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00:00:14,248 --> 00:00:17,482
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
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00:00:17,517 --> 00:00:19,418
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:19,453 --> 00:00:21,286
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:21,321 --> 00:00:24,256
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
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00:00:24,291 --> 00:00:25,724
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:25,759 --> 00:00:28,093
♪ People spouting,
"howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:28,128 --> 00:00:30,729
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:30,764 --> 00:00:34,366
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:34,401 --> 00:00:38,137
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:41,840
♪♪
11
00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:43,341
[ Thunder crashes ]
12
00:00:43,376 --> 00:00:45,177
CRYSTAL:
[ Screams ]
13
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:46,812
Mommy!
14
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Mommy!
15
00:00:50,250 --> 00:00:52,551
He's gonna get me!
16
00:00:52,586 --> 00:00:54,319
Honey, honey,
who's gonna get you?
17
00:00:54,354 --> 00:00:56,455
The president!
I saw him!
18
00:00:56,490 --> 00:00:58,190
He's gonna get me!
19
00:00:58,225 --> 00:01:01,126
Crystal, the president
isn't going to get you.
20
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But I saw him!
21
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See what I told you?
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It's that liberal school
she's going to,
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00:01:05,365 --> 00:01:07,632
filling her head
with all kinds of garbage.
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Sweetie, the president is doing
the best job he can.
25
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Your liberal school
is just trying
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to convince you
he's dangerous.
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But -- But, Daddy,
he's gonna --
28
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Unh-unh.
No "buts."
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The president is
in the White House,
30
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not here trying
to get you, okay?
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Okay.
All right.
32
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We're having a talk with
that school in the morning.
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Goodnight, honey.
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00:01:30,557 --> 00:01:33,258
[ Thunder crashes ]
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♪♪
36
00:01:40,634 --> 00:01:43,335
Hey! How are
my approval ratings?
37
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[ Screams ]
38
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[ Thunder rumbles ]
39
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REPORTER: And the latest reports
are now saying
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that over a million Canadians
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were killed
in the nuclear blast.
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The bomb dropped
by the U.S. President
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took out the entire city
of Toronto
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and fallout is expected
to kill thousands more
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in the coming days.
46
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Ike.
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00:02:06,626 --> 00:02:08,927
Ike,
I'm sorry that I...
48
00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:12,164
'caused a nuclear bomb
to be dropped on Canada.
49
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I was just --
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00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:14,699
You know, I was just trying
51
00:02:14,734 --> 00:02:16,601
to get shows that were toxic
taken down.
52
00:02:16,636 --> 00:02:18,537
You know, those shows
can be really harmful.
53
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Oh, stop being
a victim.
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Jesus Christ!
55
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BOB: What I want to know
is what gives you the right
56
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to preach your political views
to my children?!
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Our daughter
woke up with nightmares
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that the president
was going to get her.
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00:02:38,658 --> 00:02:40,625
Just because
two liberals happen to be
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principal
and vice principal
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00:02:42,262 --> 00:02:44,663
doesn't mean
you can brainwash my kids!
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Uh, we sort of have
some bigger problems
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00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:47,933
right now, Mister, uh...
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It's White.
Bob White.
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You've probably never even
heard of our family, huh?
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Well, the Whites have been here
since the beginning!
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00:02:55,475 --> 00:02:56,741
Not that it matters.
68
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'Cause no one cares
about the Whites!
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00:02:58,545 --> 00:03:00,378
Sure, everyone else
has problems,
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00:03:00,413 --> 00:03:03,215
but does anyone ever ask
the Whites how they're doing?
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00:03:03,250 --> 00:03:05,283
Mr. White, we assure you
that we run the school
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00:03:05,318 --> 00:03:07,319
in a very...
professional manner
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00:03:07,354 --> 00:03:09,621
and don't let...
personal emotions
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00:03:09,656 --> 00:03:11,823
get in the way.
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Oh, sure you don't!
76
00:03:13,793 --> 00:03:15,260
You know how hard
I had to fight
77
00:03:15,295 --> 00:03:16,795
to even get
this meeting with you?
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"Oh, who wants
to talk to the administration?"
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00:03:19,032 --> 00:03:20,665
"Oh, it's just the Whites?"
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"Aw, who cares about the Whites?
They're fine."
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Well, we've just about
had it you...
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00:03:25,972 --> 00:03:30,642
♪ If loving you is wrong,
I don't wanna be right ♪
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00:03:30,677 --> 00:03:32,544
♪ I don't wanna be right ♪
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...and, damn it,
we won't be ignored!
85
00:03:36,516 --> 00:03:38,250
I'm sorry. Is anyone else
hearing
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00:03:38,285 --> 00:03:41,786
"(If Loving You is Wrong)
I Don't Want to Be Right"
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Uh, no.
Mr. and Mrs. White,
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00:03:43,590 --> 00:03:46,324
we promise that we will not
let anything happen
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00:03:46,359 --> 00:03:50,962
that might bring the integrity
of this school into question.
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00:03:50,997 --> 00:03:53,799
Guess that's all the Whites
can hope for these days.
91
00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,374
[ Thunder crashes ]
92
00:04:15,522 --> 00:04:16,321
Hey!
93
00:04:16,356 --> 00:04:17,689
[ Screams ]
94
00:04:17,724 --> 00:04:18,957
How are
my approval ratings?
95
00:04:18,992 --> 00:04:21,426
It's the president!
[ Screams ]
96
00:04:21,461 --> 00:04:24,829
Wait, come back!
What's wrong?!
97
00:04:24,864 --> 00:04:27,332
Still no word
from the president
98
00:04:27,367 --> 00:04:29,434
as his 'Splatty Tomato'
approval rating
99
00:04:29,469 --> 00:04:32,704
drops to
an unprecedented 3%.
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00:04:32,739 --> 00:04:34,673
This puts the president
four points below
101
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:37,542
"Nut Job 2: Nutty by Nature."
102
00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:39,544
Meanwhile,
the Canadian Prime Minister,
103
00:04:39,579 --> 00:04:42,647
Justin Trudeau, called upon
Canadians to stand strong.
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Make no mistake, America.
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00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:48,553
If you do not hand over
your president,
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there will be war the likes
of which you have never seen.
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00:04:51,091 --> 00:04:54,059
Canadians
will rise together.
108
00:04:54,094 --> 00:04:56,861
I call on all Canadians
here and abroad
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00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:59,397
to stand
with their country.
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00:04:59,432 --> 00:05:02,067
The U.S. President
must answer for his crime.
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00:05:02,102 --> 00:05:05,503
And only Canada
can bring him to justice.
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00:05:05,538 --> 00:05:11,076
♪♪
113
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[ Shudders,
whimpers ]
114
00:05:13,747 --> 00:05:16,481
There, there, Tweek.
Everything is gonna be okay.
115
00:05:16,516 --> 00:05:19,551
I saw what I saw, Craig!
You have to believe me!
116
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What's going on?
117
00:05:21,521 --> 00:05:23,421
Tweek's having
a panic attack.
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It was real!
He tried to get me!
119
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Who did?
120
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The president!
121
00:05:29,529 --> 00:05:32,597
It's just your
imagination, Tweek.
122
00:05:32,632 --> 00:05:34,866
It's not his imagination.
123
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I saw him, too.
124
00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,737
You saw the president?
125
00:05:38,772 --> 00:05:40,939
Out by the quarry,
but I didn't believe it.
126
00:05:40,974 --> 00:05:42,774
I said, "How could
this be --"
127
00:05:42,809 --> 00:05:45,110
The president?
I saw him, too.
128
00:05:45,145 --> 00:05:47,579
He had a blue suit
and an orange face.
129
00:05:47,614 --> 00:05:49,581
He kept asking me,
"How are my --"
130
00:05:49,616 --> 00:05:52,150
TOKEN: "How are
my approval ratings?"
131
00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:54,819
I saw him, too.
132
00:05:54,854 --> 00:05:56,855
Dude, isn't this all
really familiar?
133
00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:58,156
I saw something
just like this
134
00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:00,592
on that show called
"Stranger --"
135
00:06:00,627 --> 00:06:03,461
"Stranger Things."
136
00:06:03,496 --> 00:06:07,098
"Stranger Things" is the show.
I saw it, too.
137
00:06:07,133 --> 00:06:09,901
But wait, isn't
"Stranger Things" just
like that movie --
138
00:06:09,936 --> 00:06:11,603
Just like that movie "It."
139
00:06:11,638 --> 00:06:13,505
You saw it, too?
140
00:06:13,540 --> 00:06:15,607
Yeah, I saw it
in the theater.
141
00:06:15,642 --> 00:06:18,410
I saw "Stranger Things"
and "It."
142
00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:22,080
Jesus.
143
00:06:22,115 --> 00:06:24,649
I don't think anyone's
imagining anything.
144
00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:26,551
I think the president
is here.
145
00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:27,986
You kids
get inside somewhere.
146
00:06:28,021 --> 00:06:31,489
I have to warn the town.
147
00:06:31,524 --> 00:06:32,957
Ugh!
148
00:06:32,992 --> 00:06:36,494
[ Indistinct chatter,
shouting ]
149
00:06:36,529 --> 00:06:38,029
All right, people.
People, please.
150
00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:40,565
We need everyone
to try and stay calm.
151
00:06:40,600 --> 00:06:42,133
How can we stay calm
when the president's
152
00:06:42,168 --> 00:06:43,835
out there
scaring our children?!
153
00:06:43,870 --> 00:06:46,471
Look, we all want
the president out of here.
154
00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:48,206
It's just a matter
of how we do it.
155
00:06:48,241 --> 00:06:50,642
I know you all
want to get rid of him.
156
00:06:50,677 --> 00:06:52,210
That's not true.
157
00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,845
The Whites still
support the president!
158
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,114
Oh, for fuck's sake,
White, he's running around
159
00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:58,583
eating our pets
and terrorizing our kids!
160
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,518
You think Hillary
would have been any better?
161
00:07:00,553 --> 00:07:01,653
[ Shouting, booing ]
162
00:07:01,688 --> 00:07:02,887
MAN:
Just sit down, Bob!
163
00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:04,989
I'm just sayin'!
I'm just sayin'!
164
00:07:05,024 --> 00:07:07,592
Listen, everyone.
I have a team right now
165
00:07:07,627 --> 00:07:09,227
that's trying to locate
the president,
166
00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:10,962
and I'd like you to hear
from Officer Bright,
167
00:07:10,997 --> 00:07:12,864
who's leading the search.
168
00:07:13,700 --> 00:07:16,000
Hey, folks.
We know you're all concerned,
169
00:07:16,035 --> 00:07:18,570
but I want to assure you that we
are doing everything we can
170
00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:21,005
to track the president down
and have him safely removed.
171
00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:23,208
Since the president was given
a splatty tomato,
172
00:07:23,243 --> 00:07:26,044
he's become very desperate
and very dangerous.
173
00:07:26,079 --> 00:07:29,113
If you see the president,
do not approach him.
174
00:07:29,148 --> 00:07:31,483
Do not try
to reason with him.
175
00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:34,586
Most importantly, remember
that this is the president,
176
00:07:34,621 --> 00:07:36,921
so you cannot shoot him.
All right?
177
00:07:36,956 --> 00:07:39,157
You can't even talk
about shooting him.
178
00:07:39,192 --> 00:07:40,725
Don't even...
179
00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:43,662
do any coy satirical takes
on shooting him.
180
00:07:45,899 --> 00:07:47,065
Okay, good.
181
00:07:47,100 --> 00:07:48,766
What we're trying to do here
182
00:07:48,801 --> 00:07:50,802
is just get the president
to go away.
183
00:07:50,837 --> 00:07:53,104
We're gonna be handing out
padlocks like this one
184
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:54,973
so everyone can lock up
their garbage.
185
00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:57,775
If we don't feed the president,
hopefully he'll just move on.
186
00:07:57,810 --> 00:07:59,244
Are there any questions?
187
00:07:59,279 --> 00:08:01,913
Can we talk about
a friend shooting him
188
00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:04,215
if it's in a sort of
a sarcastic way?
189
00:08:04,250 --> 00:08:06,217
No, no, no.
Now, it's - it's just best
190
00:08:06,252 --> 00:08:08,586
to avoid that kind of talk
altogether.
191
00:08:08,621 --> 00:08:09,954
Remember,
they can do to you
192
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,256
what they did
to Kathy Griffin.
193
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:13,124
Made her not funny
for 30 years?
194
00:08:13,159 --> 00:08:14,792
That's right.
195
00:08:14,827 --> 00:08:16,594
So best thing is just
lock up your garbage
196
00:08:16,629 --> 00:08:19,598
and see if we can get
the president to go away.
197
00:08:23,603 --> 00:08:24,936
Jesus.
198
00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:26,271
Now kids
are going missing.
199
00:08:26,306 --> 00:08:27,972
We're all
gonna be missing soon!
200
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,542
[ Exclaims ]
201
00:08:30,577 --> 00:08:32,110
Kyle!
202
00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:35,246
It's my fault.
203
00:08:35,281 --> 00:08:37,782
Ike went to go take matters
into his own hands.
204
00:08:37,817 --> 00:08:39,050
I have to find him.
205
00:08:39,085 --> 00:08:40,985
We'll help you.
206
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,587
We'll all help you.
207
00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:44,289
Guys, this could be
really dangerous.
208
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:45,924
You're not going.
209
00:08:45,959 --> 00:08:47,692
You promised tonight
we'd have a date night.
210
00:08:47,727 --> 00:08:49,594
Darling, this is a little
more pressing than date night.
211
00:08:49,629 --> 00:08:51,796
Oh, great.
212
00:08:51,831 --> 00:08:54,032
So, Kyle's stupid brother
goes missing, and I get fucked.
213
00:08:54,067 --> 00:08:56,768
How come I'm always the one
getting shit on around here?
214
00:08:56,803 --> 00:08:58,703
I don't need anyone
to go with me.
215
00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:00,305
Oh, what's the matter,
Kyle?
216
00:09:00,340 --> 00:09:01,673
Don't want me around
because you had the hots for me
217
00:09:01,708 --> 00:09:03,675
and I shut you down?
218
00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:07,011
I would never have the hots
for the person you are now.
219
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:08,313
STAN:
Come on, you guys.
220
00:09:08,348 --> 00:09:10,214
Look, we all know what
we're supposed to do now.
221
00:09:10,249 --> 00:09:12,650
We all saw "It"
and "Stranger Things."
222
00:09:12,685 --> 00:09:14,752
We need to get our backpacks
and go out to woods
223
00:09:14,787 --> 00:09:17,589
and save the town from evil
to some kick-ass '80s' music!
224
00:09:17,624 --> 00:09:23,127
♪♪
225
00:09:23,162 --> 00:09:24,629
Hello, joining us
for lunch today?
226
00:09:24,664 --> 00:09:26,130
Uh, yes.
227
00:09:26,165 --> 00:09:27,865
We are here with
our student of the day
228
00:09:27,900 --> 00:09:29,233
to reward him lunch
229
00:09:29,268 --> 00:09:30,301
with the principal
and vice principal.
230
00:09:30,336 --> 00:09:32,036
We have
a reservation.
231
00:09:32,071 --> 00:09:33,805
Okay, last name?
232
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:34,839
Woman.
233
00:09:34,874 --> 00:09:36,941
First name.
234
00:09:36,976 --> 00:09:39,043
Strong.
235
00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:40,712
Oh, yes, Strong Woman,
here we are.
236
00:09:40,747 --> 00:09:42,914
We have a nice booth
set up for you.
237
00:09:45,318 --> 00:09:47,251
We can't
keep doing this.
238
00:09:47,286 --> 00:09:49,020
People are gonna
see through it.
239
00:09:49,055 --> 00:09:50,622
Is it my fault
that I found
240
00:09:50,657 --> 00:09:52,290
the most amazing, perfect,
beautiful woman...
241
00:09:52,325 --> 00:09:53,324
at work?
242
00:09:53,359 --> 00:09:55,727
Nobody
will understand.
243
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:56,995
Maybe they will.
244
00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:58,830
We're co-workers
who are in love.
245
00:09:58,865 --> 00:10:01,199
You really that's
going to bother people?
246
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:04,936
Well, should we
order now?
247
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:19,250
[ Whistles softly ]
248
00:10:19,285 --> 00:10:20,184
RANDY: What are you
doing, Bob?
249
00:10:20,219 --> 00:10:22,053
Aah!
250
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:23,988
Have you been putting food out
for the president?
251
00:10:24,023 --> 00:10:25,690
No, I was just, uh,
252
00:10:25,725 --> 00:10:27,425
taking these finger sandwiches
to the trash.
253
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:30,328
We all agreed not to feed him
so he'd go away.
254
00:10:30,363 --> 00:10:32,664
We didn't all agree!
You all agreed!
255
00:10:32,699 --> 00:10:34,732
Nobody asked the Whites
how they felt!
256
00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:36,768
Nobody cares what the Whites
have to say!
257
00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:38,369
Bob, come on.
258
00:10:38,404 --> 00:10:40,338
You have to know it's not safe
to have him here.
259
00:10:40,373 --> 00:10:42,740
In 2003,
Hillary Clinton admitted
260
00:10:42,775 --> 00:10:44,208
to taking funds
for her foundation
261
00:10:44,243 --> 00:10:46,044
from foreign diplomats!
262
00:10:46,079 --> 00:10:48,012
What's that got to do
with anything, Bob? Come on.
263
00:10:48,047 --> 00:10:49,847
It's fucking true!
264
00:10:49,882 --> 00:10:52,917
Bob, if Canada finds out
the president is hiding here,
265
00:10:52,952 --> 00:10:54,986
they are going
to nuke us.
266
00:10:55,021 --> 00:10:56,754
He needs to go.
267
00:10:56,789 --> 00:10:59,057
Hillary wouldn't have been
any better.
268
00:10:59,092 --> 00:11:02,026
Give me
the finger sandwiches.
269
00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,795
Fine!
270
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,730
Go ahead and take
the White's sandwiches!
271
00:11:05,765 --> 00:11:08,132
They've taken
everything else!
272
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:12,837
[ The Chicago Bears'
"The Super Bowl Shuffle" plays ]
273
00:11:12,872 --> 00:11:14,939
♪ We are the Bears
shufflin' through ♪
274
00:11:14,974 --> 00:11:17,108
♪ Shufflin' on down,
doin' it for you ♪
275
00:11:17,143 --> 00:11:19,243
♪ We're so bad
we know we're good ♪
276
00:11:19,278 --> 00:11:21,746
♪ Blowin' your mind
like we knew we would ♪
277
00:11:21,781 --> 00:11:24,082
♪ We're not here
to start no trouble ♪
278
00:11:24,117 --> 00:11:25,917
♪ We're just here
to do the Super Bowl shuffle ♪
279
00:11:25,952 --> 00:11:27,385
Dude, this is
'80s' music?
280
00:11:27,420 --> 00:11:29,887
Yeah. It's Pandora.
'80s channel.
281
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:31,789
Well, just skip
to the next song, man.
282
00:11:31,824 --> 00:11:33,057
We're trying to get psyched
to destroy evil.
283
00:11:33,092 --> 00:11:35,259
We need better
'80s' music than that.
284
00:11:35,294 --> 00:11:37,829
♪ Gloria ♪
285
00:11:37,864 --> 00:11:41,399
♪ You're always
on the run now ♪
286
00:11:41,434 --> 00:11:45,436
♪ Running after somebody ♪
287
00:11:45,471 --> 00:11:49,073
♪ You gotta get him somehow ♪
288
00:11:49,108 --> 00:11:50,775
♪I think you've got
to slow down ♪
289
00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:53,444
Heidi.
Honey, what are you doing?
290
00:11:53,479 --> 00:11:55,179
This is the place --
291
00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:59,150
This is the place where I
ended it all, remember?
292
00:11:59,185 --> 00:12:00,952
This is where
I threw my phone off the bridge
293
00:12:00,987 --> 00:12:02,954
and quit Twitter for good.
294
00:12:02,989 --> 00:12:05,256
I was so different then...
295
00:12:05,291 --> 00:12:08,793
so naive and hopeful.
296
00:12:08,828 --> 00:12:11,195
Yes, honey, now,
can we get going, please?
297
00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:13,998
I'm sorry! I'm trying to have
a moment here!
298
00:12:14,033 --> 00:12:17,301
This is where our whole
relationship started, asshole!
299
00:12:17,336 --> 00:12:19,237
Yes, it's very touching,
sweetheart.
300
00:12:19,272 --> 00:12:20,972
I love you so much.
301
00:12:21,007 --> 00:12:23,274
[ Quietly ] I'm sorry
about this, you guys.
302
00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:26,844
I remember feeling
like I had nobody.
303
00:12:26,879 --> 00:12:28,479
Skinny bitch.
304
00:12:28,514 --> 00:12:31,783
We need to
keep going, guys.
305
00:12:33,219 --> 00:12:35,920
Don't tell me you haven't gotten
the President out of here.
306
00:12:35,955 --> 00:12:37,789
We haven't gotten
the President out of here.
307
00:12:37,824 --> 00:12:39,357
And there's some worse news.
308
00:12:39,392 --> 00:12:41,292
A bunch of kids
have gone missing.
309
00:12:41,327 --> 00:12:43,528
-What?
-I think we have to assume
310
00:12:43,563 --> 00:12:45,997
that the President has...
eaten them.
311
00:12:46,032 --> 00:12:47,532
[ Cries ]
312
00:12:47,567 --> 00:12:49,333
Why are you here
talking to me
313
00:12:49,368 --> 00:12:51,335
instead of trying
to find the President?!
314
00:12:51,370 --> 00:12:54,405
Don't worry, we're close.
He's out in the woods somewhere.
315
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,041
And we've set up a fox trap.
316
00:12:57,076 --> 00:12:58,876
A fox trap?
317
00:12:58,911 --> 00:13:01,345
[ Mouse squeaking ]
318
00:13:01,380 --> 00:13:05,183
[ Insects chirping ]
319
00:13:05,218 --> 00:13:06,284
[ Mouse shrieks ]
320
00:13:06,319 --> 00:13:08,019
[ Thud in distance ]
321
00:13:16,095 --> 00:13:18,229
Oh, Fox News...
322
00:13:18,264 --> 00:13:19,931
They'll listen to me.
323
00:13:19,966 --> 00:13:21,933
They'll get my side
of the story right!
324
00:13:21,968 --> 00:13:26,571
[ Imitates bird call ]
325
00:13:26,606 --> 00:13:28,306
It's a trap!
326
00:13:28,341 --> 00:13:29,507
What?
327
00:13:29,542 --> 00:13:34,512
It's a Fox trap,
Mr. President!
328
00:13:34,547 --> 00:13:36,581
Oh, thank God
for the Whites...
329
00:13:38,918 --> 00:13:45,022
♪ Hold on to the nights ♪
Ike! Ike?!
330
00:13:45,057 --> 00:13:50,261
♪ Hold on to the memories ♪
331
00:13:50,296 --> 00:13:53,431
Dude. Come on! This is not
kick-ass '80s music!
332
00:13:53,466 --> 00:13:56,434
"Hold On to the Nights"
Richard Marx. 1988.
333
00:13:56,469 --> 00:13:58,636
Do we really need music?
334
00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,905
Yeah! Craig just has
the wrong stuff.
335
00:14:00,940 --> 00:14:02,607
Forget your Pandora.
I'm doing Spotify.
336
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:04,475
'80s music. 'Kay.
There.
337
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:07,879
♪ I've got Pac-Man fever ♪
♪ Pac-Man fever ♪
338
00:14:07,914 --> 00:14:09,247
Oh, yeah.
That's better.
339
00:14:09,282 --> 00:14:11,215
Can we go please?!
340
00:14:11,250 --> 00:14:14,085
♪ I've got Pac-Man fever ♪
♪ Pac-Man fever ♪
341
00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,387
♪ I'm going out of my mind ♪
342
00:14:16,422 --> 00:14:17,421
♪ Going out of my mind ♪
343
00:14:17,456 --> 00:14:18,890
Kyle: Here it is.
344
00:14:18,925 --> 00:14:21,225
[ Door creaks opens ]
345
00:14:21,260 --> 00:14:22,960
Ike?
346
00:14:22,995 --> 00:14:24,996
Wait a minute...
347
00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:27,164
Isn't this the place
you brought me before?
348
00:14:27,199 --> 00:14:28,399
The place you said your friends
smashed your phone
349
00:14:28,434 --> 00:14:29,634
and computer...?
350
00:14:29,669 --> 00:14:32,069
I remember
I felt so bad for you.
351
00:14:32,104 --> 00:14:34,438
We used to sit in the park
and talk for hours.
352
00:14:34,473 --> 00:14:36,374
How come we never do that
anymore?
353
00:14:36,409 --> 00:14:38,209
Oh, fuck. Here we go.
354
00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:39,577
Here we go what?!
355
00:14:39,612 --> 00:14:41,545
You used to be
so nice to me.
356
00:14:41,580 --> 00:14:43,080
You used to be nice to me!
357
00:14:43,115 --> 00:14:44,582
I tried!
358
00:14:44,617 --> 00:14:46,183
But then you started
rolling your eyes
359
00:14:46,218 --> 00:14:48,286
every time I tried
to talk to you!
Ughhh...
360
00:14:48,321 --> 00:14:49,587
He's not here either.
361
00:14:49,622 --> 00:14:51,188
Dude, maybe your brother
362
00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:52,456
Didn't even go looking
for the President.
363
00:14:52,491 --> 00:14:54,525
You don't understand
Canadians.
364
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:57,061
They're fiercely loyal
to their country.
365
00:14:57,096 --> 00:15:00,564
When Canada is attacked,
they all join in the fight.
366
00:15:00,599 --> 00:15:09,206
♪♪
367
00:15:09,241 --> 00:15:17,481
♪♪
368
00:15:17,516 --> 00:15:25,990
♪♪
369
00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:30,428
Randy! Randy!
370
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:31,662
What?
They got him!
371
00:15:31,697 --> 00:15:33,531
They found the President!
372
00:15:35,634 --> 00:15:38,169
We found his hideout.
There.
373
00:15:38,204 --> 00:15:42,006
[ Eerie whispering ]
374
00:15:42,041 --> 00:15:44,041
Someone's gotta
go flush him out.
375
00:15:44,076 --> 00:15:45,376
I'll be ready to trap him.
376
00:15:45,411 --> 00:15:46,444
I'll do it.
377
00:15:46,479 --> 00:15:47,645
Hey, hey!
378
00:15:47,680 --> 00:15:49,513
Just remember
he's been eating animals
379
00:15:49,548 --> 00:15:51,716
and living like a monster.
Just...
380
00:15:51,751 --> 00:15:54,452
prepare yourself
for what you're about to see.
381
00:15:54,487 --> 00:15:58,056
[ Insects chirping ]
382
00:16:04,730 --> 00:16:07,264
Oh, my God!
383
00:16:07,299 --> 00:16:09,567
What the -- Principal
and Vice Principal...?
384
00:16:09,602 --> 00:16:10,634
I told you
we couldn't hide.
385
00:16:10,669 --> 00:16:12,169
But...
386
00:16:12,204 --> 00:16:13,738
But you two work together --
[ Gags ]
387
00:16:13,773 --> 00:16:17,541
You two work togeth--
[ Vomits ]
388
00:16:17,576 --> 00:16:20,311
[ Vomiting continues ]
389
00:16:20,346 --> 00:16:22,546
Hey, what the hell's
going on?!
390
00:16:22,581 --> 00:16:24,048
They're together!
391
00:16:24,083 --> 00:16:25,583
Who's together?
392
00:16:25,618 --> 00:16:28,419
The Principal
and the Vice Principal!
393
00:16:28,454 --> 00:16:32,390
They can't be together!
They're co-workers!
394
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:34,225
[ Vomits ]
395
00:16:34,260 --> 00:16:37,194
Wait, wait. You mean
he's actually her superior
396
00:16:37,229 --> 00:16:39,497
and they were in there --
[ Gags ]
397
00:16:39,532 --> 00:16:43,234
[ Vomiting ]
398
00:16:45,371 --> 00:16:49,573
Who would want to put
their penis in a co-worker?!
399
00:16:49,608 --> 00:16:51,509
[ Gags, vomits ]
400
00:16:51,544 --> 00:16:53,411
[ All vomiting ]
401
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:56,213
♪ Playing with
the Queen of Hearts ♪
402
00:16:56,248 --> 00:16:58,349
♪ Knowing
it ain't really smart ♪
403
00:16:58,384 --> 00:17:01,552
♪ The Joker
ain't the only fool ♪
404
00:17:01,587 --> 00:17:03,421
♪ Who'll do
anything for you ♪
405
00:17:03,456 --> 00:17:05,189
Oh, my God! Look!
406
00:17:05,224 --> 00:17:07,058
♪ Laying out another lie ♪
407
00:17:07,093 --> 00:17:08,559
These are Ike's
toy binoculars!
408
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:09,727
He was here!
409
00:17:09,762 --> 00:17:11,295
Ike!
410
00:17:11,330 --> 00:17:13,230
I remember
this place too...
411
00:17:13,265 --> 00:17:16,400
This is where you brought me
on Halloween. Remember?
412
00:17:16,435 --> 00:17:18,169
[ Sarcastically ] Yes, darling,
wasn't it romantic?
413
00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:19,770
No!
It wasn't romantic.
414
00:17:19,805 --> 00:17:22,440
There was a witch and you had me
dress up like Gretel and...
415
00:17:22,475 --> 00:17:24,775
[gasps] you were trying
to get me killed!
416
00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:27,178
Sweetheart, you made me late to
the pumpkin patch, remember?
417
00:17:27,213 --> 00:17:29,080
I was hurt.
-You were hurt!
418
00:17:29,115 --> 00:17:31,115
You were the victim.
419
00:17:31,150 --> 00:17:33,384
I'm glad you understand.
420
00:17:33,419 --> 00:17:36,153
Who turned you into this,
Heidi?
421
00:17:36,188 --> 00:17:38,089
Shut up!
Skinny-ass bitch!
422
00:17:38,124 --> 00:17:40,791
You don't know
anything!
423
00:17:40,826 --> 00:17:42,827
Heidi, I think spooky walk
in the woods
424
00:17:42,862 --> 00:17:44,495
is making you lose it
a little bit.
425
00:17:44,530 --> 00:17:45,496
Stan: Guys!
426
00:17:52,638 --> 00:17:56,607
I'm seriously dehydrated
and starving.
427
00:17:56,642 --> 00:17:57,808
I'm pretty sick of this shit,
428
00:17:57,843 --> 00:18:00,178
so you better-- Aah!
429
00:18:03,816 --> 00:18:06,117
Have we already done
a search of this area?
430
00:18:06,152 --> 00:18:07,818
Maybe Heidi went there
with her boyfriend!
431
00:18:07,853 --> 00:18:09,687
She would have called
by now.
432
00:18:09,722 --> 00:18:11,388
I just talked
to the McKormicks.
433
00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:13,224
They haven't seen Tweek or Craig
since yesterday.
434
00:18:15,528 --> 00:18:18,762
Randy!
435
00:18:18,797 --> 00:18:20,264
Did you find anything?
436
00:18:22,668 --> 00:18:25,269
Sharon...I-I...
437
00:18:25,304 --> 00:18:27,805
What is it?
What did you find?
438
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:30,341
The...There's...
Ugh...
439
00:18:30,376 --> 00:18:32,543
Tell me!
You have to tell me!
440
00:18:37,349 --> 00:18:39,183
Oh, God.
What did you see?!
441
00:18:39,218 --> 00:18:40,885
You don't want to know.
442
00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:43,320
You have to tell me!
I can take it!
443
00:18:43,355 --> 00:18:45,322
Did you find
our son's arm?
444
00:18:45,357 --> 00:18:49,727
Did you find him
torn apart? What?!
445
00:18:49,762 --> 00:18:54,498
The Principal and Vice Principal
are, like...together.
446
00:18:54,533 --> 00:18:57,602
[ Vomits ]
Aww!
447
00:18:59,572 --> 00:19:03,641
[ High-pitched horn blows ]
448
00:19:03,676 --> 00:19:09,480
♪♪
449
00:19:09,515 --> 00:19:15,319
♪♪
450
00:19:15,354 --> 00:19:16,954
It's the President!
451
00:19:16,989 --> 00:19:20,891
♪♪
452
00:19:20,926 --> 00:19:23,194
Ike! Kyle!
453
00:19:23,229 --> 00:19:25,196
Stan, you're okay!
454
00:19:25,231 --> 00:19:26,564
Yeah, we're okay!
455
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:29,200
We got him.
We got the son of a bitch.
456
00:19:29,235 --> 00:19:30,834
Get back!
457
00:19:30,869 --> 00:19:35,306
Everyone back! Do it now!
Get over here, family!
458
00:19:35,341 --> 00:19:38,776
Bob, for the love of Pete, our
country is about to go to war!
459
00:19:38,811 --> 00:19:40,244
You wanna know
where there's a war?!
460
00:19:40,279 --> 00:19:41,845
There's a war on
Christmas!
461
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,480
Nobody cares about that!
462
00:19:43,515 --> 00:19:44,882
'Cause guess who
loves Christmas.
463
00:19:44,917 --> 00:19:46,617
The Whites!
464
00:19:46,652 --> 00:19:48,619
At least this man's
trying to save Christmas!
465
00:19:48,654 --> 00:19:50,287
[ Muffled ] That's true!
466
00:19:50,322 --> 00:19:52,389
He's not
saving Christmas, Bob.
467
00:19:52,424 --> 00:19:53,557
He's running around,
scaring your kids,
468
00:19:53,592 --> 00:19:55,392
and shitting in the woods.
469
00:19:55,427 --> 00:19:58,495
[ Sighs, sobs ]
Come on, Bob.
470
00:19:58,530 --> 00:20:00,431
What's best for your daughter?
I mean, really?
471
00:20:01,767 --> 00:20:05,703
HEIDI: You piece of shit!
This was all your fault!
472
00:20:05,738 --> 00:20:07,905
You controlled me
and manipulated me
473
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:09,807
and turned me into this!
474
00:20:09,842 --> 00:20:12,343
Baby, put down the gun,
sweetheart, okay?
475
00:20:12,378 --> 00:20:15,412
I used to be kind.
I used to be caring.
476
00:20:15,447 --> 00:20:20,718
But then you -- you...
477
00:20:20,753 --> 00:20:23,721
No.
Not you.
478
00:20:23,756 --> 00:20:26,724
Me.
I did this.
479
00:20:26,759 --> 00:20:30,894
I let being a victim
become a way of life.
480
00:20:30,929 --> 00:20:34,331
If you always
make yourself the victim,
481
00:20:34,366 --> 00:20:36,934
you can justify
being awful.
482
00:20:36,969 --> 00:20:38,736
Eric...
483
00:20:38,771 --> 00:20:40,337
I'm sorry.
484
00:20:40,372 --> 00:20:42,339
I'm breaking up with you.
485
00:20:42,374 --> 00:20:44,642
Honey, don't be
ridiculous.
486
00:20:44,677 --> 00:20:46,777
I've been ridiculous.
487
00:20:46,812 --> 00:20:49,580
I have to learn to stop
feeling sorry for myself.
488
00:20:49,615 --> 00:20:51,949
Heidi, you are not
breaking up with me.
489
00:20:51,984 --> 00:20:54,818
Yes, I am.
It's over.
490
00:20:54,853 --> 00:20:57,021
I'm afraid I can't let you
do that, sweetheart!
491
00:20:57,056 --> 00:20:59,556
Step back!
I'll do it! I swear to God!
492
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:01,292
It's not gonna work
this time, Eric.
493
00:21:01,327 --> 00:21:03,327
You break up with me,
I will kill myself!
494
00:21:03,362 --> 00:21:04,595
The choice
is yours, Heidi!
495
00:21:04,630 --> 00:21:05,829
Come on, everybody!
496
00:21:05,864 --> 00:21:07,831
"Eric,
we don't want you to die."
497
00:21:07,866 --> 00:21:09,533
I'm sorry.
498
00:21:09,568 --> 00:21:10,801
You can be the victim.
499
00:21:10,836 --> 00:21:11,835
I can't.
500
00:21:11,870 --> 00:21:13,671
Heidi!
501
00:21:13,706 --> 00:21:15,806
Heidi, I'm gonna do it!
Here we go!
502
00:21:15,841 --> 00:21:17,675
Heidi?!
Are you seriously --
503
00:21:17,710 --> 00:21:21,011
[ Screams ]
504
00:21:21,046 --> 00:21:22,946
MAN:
He broke free.
505
00:21:22,981 --> 00:21:25,949
The president
is on the loose again.
506
00:21:25,984 --> 00:21:28,485
He'll be
even more desperate now.
507
00:21:28,520 --> 00:21:30,454
It's going to get worse.
508
00:21:30,489 --> 00:21:32,823
We can't destroy him,
can we?
509
00:21:32,858 --> 00:21:35,392
I don't know.
510
00:21:35,427 --> 00:21:37,328
I guess...
511
00:21:37,363 --> 00:21:38,729
it's up to the Whites.
512
00:21:41,700 --> 00:21:48,038
♪♪
513
00:21:48,073 --> 00:21:54,679
♪♪
514
00:21:55,714 --> 00:21:57,548
[ Gags ]
515
00:21:57,583 --> 00:22:01,085
[ Vomiting ]
516
00:22:02,421 --> 00:22:06,824
Who would want to put
their penis in a co-worker?!
517
00:22:06,859 --> 00:22:08,125
[ Gags, vomits ]
518
00:22:08,160 --> 00:22:09,660
[ All vomiting ]