1
00:00:03,529 --> 00:00:05,148
Miss, I'm done here.
2
00:00:05,149 --> 00:00:06,568
Oh, I've been done here for years.
3
00:00:06,569 --> 00:00:08,528
You don't see me getting a parade.
4
00:00:11,399 --> 00:00:13,778
Oh, looks like we lost electricity.
5
00:00:13,779 --> 00:00:18,448
Uh-oh, all the food in the
refrigerator will go worse.
6
00:00:18,449 --> 00:00:20,318
Is it a bad sign that
7
00:00:20,319 --> 00:00:23,738
I can actually see everything better?
8
00:00:23,739 --> 00:00:27,608
Well, we finally found lighting
that made the food look edible.
9
00:00:27,609 --> 00:00:29,318
Yeah, it's almost dark
enough for Caroline
10
00:00:29,319 --> 00:00:31,738
to agree to have sex in here.
11
00:00:31,739 --> 00:00:35,709
Max, have you ever seen balls in light?
12
00:00:36,689 --> 00:00:39,448
They're not pretty.
13
00:00:39,449 --> 00:00:42,108
Nobody panic!
14
00:00:42,109 --> 00:00:44,108
The power is out in the whole building.
15
00:00:44,109 --> 00:00:48,818
We've got less energy
than a Steely Dan concert.
16
00:00:48,819 --> 00:00:50,858
Han, you look exactly like
17
00:00:50,859 --> 00:00:53,988
a Doozer from "Fraggle Rock" right now.
18
00:00:53,989 --> 00:00:55,898
All right, we've got
to keep the diner safe
19
00:00:55,899 --> 00:00:57,818
from hooligans and looters.
20
00:00:57,819 --> 00:00:59,688
You're still on the clock!
21
00:00:59,689 --> 00:01:03,238
And you're on my foot.
22
00:01:03,239 --> 00:01:06,589
Sorry, Earl, I can't
see you in the dark....
23
00:01:08,609 --> 00:01:11,528
But not in a racist way.
24
00:01:11,529 --> 00:01:14,028
And I can't see you in the light
25
00:01:14,029 --> 00:01:16,108
in a short way.
26
00:01:16,109 --> 00:01:18,898
Han, who would loot this diner?
27
00:01:18,899 --> 00:01:22,379
Unless they're looters looking
specifically for disappointment.
28
00:01:26,859 --> 00:01:28,398
Max?
29
00:01:28,399 --> 00:01:30,688
Just taking this vodka
30
00:01:30,689 --> 00:01:32,789
and cash register to a safe place.
31
00:01:38,069 --> 00:01:43,971
Subtitle sync and corrections by
awaqeded for www.addic7ed.com.
32
00:01:51,891 --> 00:01:54,010
Our new dessert bar
is under construction
33
00:01:54,011 --> 00:01:55,300
and it's not quite there yet.
34
00:01:55,301 --> 00:01:56,680
Kind of like the credit card bill
35
00:01:56,681 --> 00:01:58,760
I lied about mailing,
36
00:01:58,761 --> 00:02:02,590
but I've chosen you two to
be the first to get a preview.
37
00:02:02,591 --> 00:02:05,180
She invited other
people. They said, "No."
38
00:02:05,181 --> 00:02:08,300
She told me there would
be some hard candy.
39
00:02:08,301 --> 00:02:11,590
Better be some hard candy.
40
00:02:11,591 --> 00:02:13,760
I have peppermints inside.
41
00:02:13,761 --> 00:02:16,071
Then we're fine.
42
00:02:19,801 --> 00:02:22,550
So it doesn't look like much now,
43
00:02:22,551 --> 00:02:25,220
but with a little
moxie and a lot of work,
44
00:02:25,221 --> 00:02:26,850
it's gonna be gorgeous.
45
00:02:26,851 --> 00:02:29,140
Like Khloé Kardashian.
46
00:02:29,141 --> 00:02:32,451
Is that the one that's a dude now?
47
00:02:35,141 --> 00:02:38,741
Okay, where's my treat?
48
00:02:39,761 --> 00:02:40,800
Impressive,
49
00:02:40,801 --> 00:02:42,720
and you've stolen almost nothing
50
00:02:42,721 --> 00:02:45,220
from the diner to do this.
51
00:02:45,221 --> 00:02:50,010
Oh, wait, I see my sport coat
is being used as a paint rag.
52
00:02:50,011 --> 00:02:52,640
That coat's yours?
53
00:02:52,641 --> 00:02:55,861
I thought it belonged
to a service Chihuahua.
54
00:02:57,301 --> 00:03:00,191
Hey, everybody.
55
00:03:02,391 --> 00:03:05,300
Oh, yeah.
56
00:03:05,301 --> 00:03:07,800
Hubba, hubba, hot stuff.
57
00:03:07,801 --> 00:03:09,640
You know, if I were still single,
58
00:03:09,641 --> 00:03:12,890
I'd let you Spackle my hole.
59
00:03:12,891 --> 00:03:15,930
You heard what she said, beefcake.
60
00:03:15,931 --> 00:03:17,260
I'm not gay.
61
00:03:17,261 --> 00:03:20,090
I'm just very pro-harassment.
62
00:03:20,091 --> 00:03:22,180
I'm proud of you, girls.
63
00:03:22,181 --> 00:03:24,180
You're making your dreams come true,
64
00:03:24,181 --> 00:03:26,800
and my dreams, too,
assuming you'll allow me
65
00:03:26,801 --> 00:03:28,090
to start a tab here.
66
00:03:28,091 --> 00:03:30,890
I'll never pay.
67
00:03:30,891 --> 00:03:33,470
Does this mean you're not
paying your tab at the diner?
68
00:03:33,471 --> 00:03:36,180
Uh-huh.
69
00:03:36,181 --> 00:03:37,470
Earl?
70
00:03:37,471 --> 00:03:39,611
He walks fast when he wants to.
71
00:03:41,011 --> 00:03:42,680
I gotta get going too.
72
00:03:42,681 --> 00:03:44,424
You know, we just came
from the baby doctor,
73
00:03:44,425 --> 00:03:46,220
and he put me on bed rest.
74
00:03:46,221 --> 00:03:50,010
At first I thought the
doctor said, "Bed arrest, '
75
00:03:50,011 --> 00:03:52,970
which is one of my favorite games.
76
00:03:52,971 --> 00:03:55,300
Sophie, what's wrong? Are you okay?
77
00:03:55,301 --> 00:03:57,720
Well, I'm five months along,
78
00:03:57,721 --> 00:03:59,890
and the baby already weighs 15 pounds,
79
00:03:59,891 --> 00:04:02,720
so the doctor's just a little worried.
80
00:04:02,721 --> 00:04:04,760
He's afraid it'll fall out
81
00:04:04,761 --> 00:04:08,031
like a watermelon through
a plastic grocery bag.
82
00:04:09,261 --> 00:04:10,970
Come on, baby, let's get you in bed
83
00:04:10,971 --> 00:04:12,590
and get your legs up.
84
00:04:12,591 --> 00:04:14,494
I can't believe none of
this has to do with sex.
85
00:04:14,495 --> 00:04:15,925
Yeah.
86
00:04:17,091 --> 00:04:18,390
Knock, knock. It's Randy.
87
00:04:18,391 --> 00:04:19,901
I got a six-pack...
88
00:04:21,141 --> 00:04:23,890
And I brought some beers.
89
00:04:23,891 --> 00:04:26,470
Who wants some warm, wet, deli beer?
90
00:04:26,471 --> 00:04:28,850
This is why you're the
best boyfriend ever.
91
00:04:28,851 --> 00:04:30,760
Warm, wet deli beer
is the official drink
92
00:04:30,761 --> 00:04:33,590
of my personality.
93
00:04:33,591 --> 00:04:35,260
So, Randy, look.
94
00:04:35,261 --> 00:04:37,760
What do you think of the new bar space?
95
00:04:37,761 --> 00:04:39,590
I've got a bar-related question.
96
00:04:39,591 --> 00:04:41,510
How you gonna fit in the bar?
97
00:04:41,511 --> 00:04:44,050
It's all right here
on the blueprints, see?
98
00:04:44,051 --> 00:04:46,260
The bar goes here, so
that leaves ten feet
99
00:04:46,261 --> 00:04:48,350
for the cafe tables and
the front door entrance.
100
00:04:48,351 --> 00:04:50,890
Uh, you see this number ten right here?
101
00:04:50,891 --> 00:04:55,361
You see the two dashes after
it? Those are inches, not feet.
102
00:04:56,721 --> 00:04:59,720
You got 10 inches.
103
00:04:59,721 --> 00:05:03,571
First time I've ever been
disappointed with 10 inches.
104
00:05:05,681 --> 00:05:08,140
Well, that's the last
time I get an architect
105
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:11,850
from the "casual encounters"
section of Craigslist.
106
00:05:11,851 --> 00:05:13,590
Ugh.
107
00:05:13,591 --> 00:05:16,590
The lady from the pizza place
next door is banging back again.
108
00:05:16,591 --> 00:05:19,050
Yeah, they should pay less
attention to our business
109
00:05:19,051 --> 00:05:20,760
and more attention to their own.
110
00:05:20,761 --> 00:05:22,760
There's so much oil on their pizza,
111
00:05:22,761 --> 00:05:24,590
the U.S. might invade it.
112
00:05:24,591 --> 00:05:25,890
You know what?
113
00:05:25,891 --> 00:05:26,970
I think we've just
114
00:05:26,971 --> 00:05:28,430
blown past "warm beers."
115
00:05:28,431 --> 00:05:29,970
I'm gonna go get us some whiskey.
116
00:05:29,971 --> 00:05:32,651
10 inches always looks a
whole lot bigger with bourbon.
117
00:05:34,851 --> 00:05:37,260
Oh, my God, Max, we need more space.
118
00:05:37,261 --> 00:05:40,350
I know; we spend way
too much time together.
119
00:05:40,351 --> 00:05:41,890
Hey!
120
00:05:41,891 --> 00:05:45,850
Enough with the noise, cupcake bitches.
121
00:05:45,851 --> 00:05:49,930
You gotta stop with this
freakin' racket already.
122
00:05:49,931 --> 00:05:52,720
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Calm down, Gina.
123
00:05:52,721 --> 00:05:54,930
What, 'cause I'm Italian,
124
00:05:54,931 --> 00:05:57,590
my name's gotta be Gina?
125
00:05:57,591 --> 00:06:01,550
It's Angie. Gina's my middle name.
126
00:06:01,551 --> 00:06:04,821
Oh, I thought your middle
name was "bangs a lot."
127
00:06:06,091 --> 00:06:08,350
Angie, we're expanding our shop,
128
00:06:08,351 --> 00:06:10,010
and we have a permit
for the construction,
129
00:06:10,011 --> 00:06:11,850
so it's above board.
130
00:06:11,851 --> 00:06:14,220
Which, yes, even I'm surprised about.
131
00:06:14,221 --> 00:06:16,930
You got a permit to destroy my business?
132
00:06:16,931 --> 00:06:19,930
Nobody wants to eat pizza
133
00:06:19,931 --> 00:06:23,430
next to this constant freaking racket.
134
00:06:23,431 --> 00:06:26,930
What's your freaking point?
135
00:06:26,931 --> 00:06:29,031
Max, I didn't know you spoke Italian.
136
00:06:30,641 --> 00:06:31,850
Follow me.
137
00:06:31,851 --> 00:06:34,260
I want yous to see
the hell you're making.
138
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:36,430
Um, that's a firm pass.
139
00:06:36,431 --> 00:06:38,031
- I'll throw in a free slice.
- Okay.
140
00:06:49,970 --> 00:06:51,429
See?
141
00:06:51,430 --> 00:06:53,249
See what you're doing to our office
142
00:06:53,250 --> 00:06:54,945
from all that banging next door?
143
00:06:54,946 --> 00:06:56,865
You're destroying it.
144
00:06:56,866 --> 00:06:58,865
Uh, look, you can't destroy a room
145
00:06:58,866 --> 00:07:02,445
that has this strong of
a "hostage basement" vibe.
146
00:07:02,446 --> 00:07:05,365
You got cracks, and falling plaster,
147
00:07:05,366 --> 00:07:06,905
and my brother and I are fed up.
148
00:07:06,906 --> 00:07:08,745
Right, Angelo?
149
00:07:08,746 --> 00:07:10,575
He says, "Right."
150
00:07:10,576 --> 00:07:12,365
He's my twin.
151
00:07:12,366 --> 00:07:15,075
We agree with our minds.
152
00:07:15,076 --> 00:07:18,155
Um, Angie, when do we
get that free slice?
153
00:07:18,156 --> 00:07:20,285
Not to be pushy, but a deal is a deal,
154
00:07:20,286 --> 00:07:22,365
and today's a carb day for me.
155
00:07:25,156 --> 00:07:26,905
What the frig?
156
00:07:26,906 --> 00:07:30,535
I just got my hair cut for
our high school reunion.
157
00:07:30,536 --> 00:07:31,945
Now it's ruined.
158
00:07:33,906 --> 00:07:37,075
It's a frickin' war zone in here!
159
00:07:37,076 --> 00:07:39,865
My father would be turning in his grave
160
00:07:39,866 --> 00:07:42,945
if we'd been able to
give him a proper burial.
161
00:07:42,946 --> 00:07:44,575
How you gonna make this right?
162
00:07:44,576 --> 00:07:46,865
Look, Angie and Angelo,
163
00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:48,905
we're sorry about the inconvenience,
164
00:07:48,906 --> 00:07:51,075
but it'll just be another
week of construction.
165
00:07:51,076 --> 00:07:53,035
We promise to keep the
noise down to a minimum.
166
00:07:53,036 --> 00:07:54,905
Right, Max?
167
00:07:54,906 --> 00:07:57,245
She's agreeing with her mind.
168
00:07:57,246 --> 00:08:00,655
Hey, just came by to
see if everything's okay,
169
00:08:00,656 --> 00:08:03,035
and to say I've never
seen the statue of David
170
00:08:03,036 --> 00:08:05,825
with a slice of pizza over his junk.
171
00:08:05,826 --> 00:08:08,905
Who's this hunk of gabbagoul?
172
00:08:08,906 --> 00:08:11,445
This hunk is Randy, and he's my...
173
00:08:11,446 --> 00:08:14,985
Lawyer, and I'm sure he's here
to make sure there's no problem.
174
00:08:14,986 --> 00:08:16,745
There's not problem, right, Angie?
175
00:08:16,746 --> 00:08:20,136
The only problem I see
now is that shirt on him.
176
00:08:23,156 --> 00:08:25,575
Hi, I'm Angie,
177
00:08:25,576 --> 00:08:29,865
but I'm thinking about
changing my name to yours.
178
00:08:29,866 --> 00:08:32,745
Props, that's a good line.
179
00:08:32,746 --> 00:08:35,865
So, Angie, what do you think?
180
00:08:35,866 --> 00:08:37,825
Can you stand another
week of the construction?
181
00:08:37,826 --> 00:08:40,825
All right.
182
00:08:40,826 --> 00:08:42,445
I'll give yous two another week,
183
00:08:42,446 --> 00:08:44,405
'cause of Randy here,
184
00:08:44,406 --> 00:08:46,985
but that's the last thing
I ever do for you two.
185
00:08:46,986 --> 00:08:50,615
You, I'd do whatever you want..
186
00:08:50,616 --> 00:08:54,615
Tonight and in perpetuity.
187
00:08:54,616 --> 00:08:56,195
"Perpetuity"?
188
00:08:56,196 --> 00:09:00,086
Better not be Italian for "the butt."
189
00:09:07,076 --> 00:09:09,035
Guys,
190
00:09:09,036 --> 00:09:11,966
I have a genius idea to
fix the dessert bar problem.
191
00:09:13,446 --> 00:09:15,285
What if somehow we could convince Angie
192
00:09:15,286 --> 00:09:18,636
to let us break through the wall
and rent out their back office?
193
00:09:20,906 --> 00:09:22,245
Come on!
194
00:09:22,246 --> 00:09:25,195
This is a genius idea.
195
00:09:25,196 --> 00:09:27,905
Their business is struggling,
196
00:09:27,906 --> 00:09:30,695
and we could pay them rent.
197
00:09:30,696 --> 00:09:32,195
It's either that or we have to use
198
00:09:32,196 --> 00:09:34,615
dollhouse furniture for the dessert bar.
199
00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:35,905
You know what? She's right.
200
00:09:35,906 --> 00:09:37,615
It is a good idea.
201
00:09:37,616 --> 00:09:40,075
You just gotta figure out a
way to get on Angie's good side.
202
00:09:40,076 --> 00:09:43,325
Maybe you bring her a
bouquet of cigarettes.
203
00:09:43,326 --> 00:09:46,825
Okay, Caroline, the only thing
Angie likes about us is him,
204
00:09:46,826 --> 00:09:49,535
and honestly, the only
thing I like about us is him.
205
00:09:49,536 --> 00:09:51,655
That's perfect; we should
bring Randy over there
206
00:09:51,656 --> 00:09:52,985
when we go ask her.
207
00:09:52,986 --> 00:09:55,615
Randy, this has got to work,
208
00:09:55,616 --> 00:09:56,905
so wear a tight shirt,
209
00:09:56,906 --> 00:09:59,176
and maybe put a little
Parmesan behind your ears.
210
00:10:04,286 --> 00:10:06,745
Uh.
211
00:10:06,746 --> 00:10:09,985
So, Angelo, any idea when
your sister is getting back?
212
00:10:12,906 --> 00:10:16,285
Well, it is a long commute from hell.
213
00:10:16,286 --> 00:10:18,865
Oh...
214
00:10:18,866 --> 00:10:20,485
Hi, Randy.
215
00:10:20,486 --> 00:10:23,905
I would make out with you,
but I just got a manicure,
216
00:10:23,906 --> 00:10:27,006
and I like to use my nails.
217
00:10:27,946 --> 00:10:30,615
Next time.
218
00:10:30,616 --> 00:10:32,985
So we came here with
a business proposition,
219
00:10:32,986 --> 00:10:35,195
and some delicious cupcakes.
220
00:10:35,196 --> 00:10:36,615
I'll need the plate back.
221
00:10:36,616 --> 00:10:39,075
Get those away from me!
222
00:10:39,076 --> 00:10:41,695
I'm going to my reunion
in a dress so tight
223
00:10:41,696 --> 00:10:43,905
you could see the kidney Angelo gave me
224
00:10:43,906 --> 00:10:47,796
from when I had renal failure
from drinking too much Tab.
225
00:10:49,246 --> 00:10:52,535
First of all, Angie,
Max and I are so glad
226
00:10:52,536 --> 00:10:55,615
to hear that you pulled
through from the renal failure,
227
00:10:55,616 --> 00:10:58,245
but the real reason we're here is...
228
00:10:58,246 --> 00:11:00,865
did you see Randy?
229
00:11:00,866 --> 00:11:02,245
Look, let's move this along.
230
00:11:02,246 --> 00:11:03,615
We want to bust through this wall
231
00:11:03,616 --> 00:11:05,075
and rent your little pizza hut here.
232
00:11:05,076 --> 00:11:06,365
Well, I'm in charge,
233
00:11:06,366 --> 00:11:07,945
and I'm not renting to yous two.
234
00:11:07,946 --> 00:11:09,535
I don't have time for this.
235
00:11:09,536 --> 00:11:11,905
I still don't have a date
for my reunion tomorrow,
236
00:11:11,906 --> 00:11:13,745
and this stress is bad for my face.
237
00:11:13,746 --> 00:11:17,046
I already have more filler
than a two-hour "Dateline."
238
00:11:19,746 --> 00:11:21,985
Angie, how does a woman like you
239
00:11:21,986 --> 00:11:24,325
not have a date for your reunion?
240
00:11:24,326 --> 00:11:26,325
I mean, not to be too forward,
241
00:11:26,326 --> 00:11:28,695
but hot magenta really
brings out your eyes.
242
00:11:28,696 --> 00:11:31,825
Well, you're not wrong.
243
00:11:31,826 --> 00:11:34,365
You know what would be wrong?
244
00:11:34,366 --> 00:11:36,865
If Randy didn't take you
245
00:11:36,866 --> 00:11:39,985
to your reunion tomorrow night.
246
00:11:39,986 --> 00:11:43,035
Do you want to be punched in
the face with my ring hand?
247
00:11:43,036 --> 00:11:44,485
You know what?
248
00:11:44,486 --> 00:11:46,195
That...
249
00:11:46,196 --> 00:11:49,075
is a great idea.
250
00:11:49,076 --> 00:11:52,365
Angie, I would be honored
to take your to your reunion.
251
00:11:52,366 --> 00:11:53,905
Oh, my God!
252
00:11:53,906 --> 00:11:56,615
Really?
253
00:11:56,616 --> 00:11:59,365
What about Angelo?
What's he supposed to do?
254
00:11:59,366 --> 00:12:04,075
Angelo, do you want to bring
one of these two to the reunion?
255
00:12:04,076 --> 00:12:06,865
They're not my type.
256
00:12:06,866 --> 00:12:09,296
Two fives make a ten, right?
257
00:12:18,583 --> 00:12:20,702
Oleg!
258
00:12:20,703 --> 00:12:22,952
I know we don't really
have standards here,
259
00:12:22,953 --> 00:12:27,013
but the customer said that
her steak shouldn't do this.
260
00:12:29,083 --> 00:12:33,702
Well, tell her not to turn
the plate upside down then.
261
00:12:33,703 --> 00:12:35,292
I'm FaceTiming with Sophie.
262
00:12:35,293 --> 00:12:36,582
She's lonely.
263
00:12:36,583 --> 00:12:39,412
Say "hi" to Caroline.
264
00:12:39,413 --> 00:12:42,502
I'm not that lonely.
265
00:12:42,503 --> 00:12:45,742
Ugh, I just scrubbed a table.
266
00:12:45,743 --> 00:12:47,292
That is how upset I am.
267
00:12:47,293 --> 00:12:49,792
I should have never let
Randy go to that reunion.
268
00:12:49,793 --> 00:12:51,912
And I should have never
269
00:12:51,913 --> 00:12:55,162
let Buddy Holly get on that plane,
270
00:12:55,163 --> 00:12:56,702
but what're you gonna do?
271
00:12:56,703 --> 00:13:00,002
Other than play it over and over again
272
00:13:00,003 --> 00:13:02,582
in your mind for 60 years.
273
00:13:02,583 --> 00:13:04,702
Max, it'll all be worth it
274
00:13:04,703 --> 00:13:06,792
when we get that extra
space for our dessert bar.
275
00:13:06,793 --> 00:13:09,202
Why would God make Randy look like that
276
00:13:09,203 --> 00:13:11,622
if not to help us get stuff?
277
00:13:11,623 --> 00:13:13,292
I'm worried about Randy.
278
00:13:13,293 --> 00:13:15,042
He is strong, but she has the strength
279
00:13:15,043 --> 00:13:17,002
of ten horny women.
280
00:13:17,003 --> 00:13:19,412
Somebody talk to me.
281
00:13:19,413 --> 00:13:21,872
I'm dying here.
282
00:13:21,873 --> 00:13:24,952
I just watched all eight
seasons of "Perfect Strangers."
283
00:13:24,953 --> 00:13:28,263
I'm... I'm just...
I'm... I'm Balki'd out.
284
00:13:29,583 --> 00:13:32,412
I just felt a shift in the force.
285
00:13:32,413 --> 00:13:35,002
Did somebody clean a table over there?
286
00:13:35,003 --> 00:13:36,412
Is everything okay?
287
00:13:36,413 --> 00:13:38,412
She's upset because Angie
288
00:13:38,413 --> 00:13:40,582
from the pizza parlor
next door needed a date
289
00:13:40,583 --> 00:13:42,912
to her high school
reunion, and Randy took her.
290
00:13:42,913 --> 00:13:44,792
Well, that's hurtful.
291
00:13:44,793 --> 00:13:46,872
I've asked Angie out twice.
292
00:13:46,873 --> 00:13:49,872
They're not on a real date, Han.
293
00:13:49,873 --> 00:13:51,912
He's just trying to convince her
294
00:13:51,913 --> 00:13:53,372
to let us rent their back office.
295
00:13:53,373 --> 00:13:55,452
Randy's wasting his time.
296
00:13:55,453 --> 00:13:57,872
It's actually Angie's
delightful brother Angelo
297
00:13:57,873 --> 00:13:59,372
who controls the lease.
298
00:13:59,373 --> 00:14:02,002
Angelo's in charge?
299
00:14:02,003 --> 00:14:04,582
Angelo's "delightful"?
300
00:14:04,583 --> 00:14:07,912
Ugh, I am so bored
301
00:14:07,913 --> 00:14:12,053
that I just got a degree
from DeVry University.
302
00:14:13,243 --> 00:14:16,662
So she tricked Randy
303
00:14:16,663 --> 00:14:18,122
into going to that reunion with her?
304
00:14:18,123 --> 00:14:20,242
I am going to the high school
305
00:14:20,243 --> 00:14:21,832
to get my man back... oh, my God,
306
00:14:21,833 --> 00:14:23,832
I sound just like my mother.
307
00:14:23,833 --> 00:14:26,332
We should go there
and sweet-talk Angelo
308
00:14:26,333 --> 00:14:27,872
into giving us the space.
309
00:14:27,873 --> 00:14:30,292
Oh, but we're "not his type,"
310
00:14:30,293 --> 00:14:32,242
which is a shame, because
I really wanted some of
311
00:14:32,243 --> 00:14:35,372
that 50-year-old
video-game-addict money.
312
00:14:35,373 --> 00:14:37,702
Well, where are we
gonna get tacky dresses
313
00:14:37,703 --> 00:14:39,452
and hair from 1986?
314
00:14:40,953 --> 00:14:43,292
I can make you look like it's 1986
315
00:14:43,293 --> 00:14:47,223
'cause I lived in Poland in 2003!
316
00:14:59,953 --> 00:15:02,002
How you doin'?
317
00:15:02,003 --> 00:15:05,792
How you doin'?
318
00:15:05,793 --> 00:15:08,412
How you doin'?
319
00:15:08,413 --> 00:15:10,662
Oh, Jimmy Vecchio!
320
00:15:10,663 --> 00:15:13,792
It's Max... Blackilini.
321
00:15:13,793 --> 00:15:16,002
Doesn't ring a bell.
322
00:15:16,003 --> 00:15:17,332
What about me?
323
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:18,622
It's Caroline...
324
00:15:18,623 --> 00:15:21,582
uh, Cacciatore!
325
00:15:21,583 --> 00:15:25,412
Didn't we take math together
with Mr. Bag-a-two-shoes?
326
00:15:25,413 --> 00:15:27,002
Never heard of him.
327
00:15:27,003 --> 00:15:29,973
- Eh!
- Forget about it.
328
00:15:31,623 --> 00:15:32,952
Oh, there's Angelo
329
00:15:32,953 --> 00:15:34,242
dancing by himself.
330
00:15:34,243 --> 00:15:36,452
No surprise there.
331
00:15:36,453 --> 00:15:39,643
Wow, I've never seen a sweat-suit tux.
332
00:15:40,833 --> 00:15:41,912
Angelo.
333
00:15:41,913 --> 00:15:43,952
It's Max and Caroline
334
00:15:43,953 --> 00:15:45,202
from next door.
335
00:15:45,203 --> 00:15:46,832
Um, you probably don't recognize us.
336
00:15:46,833 --> 00:15:49,002
I'm hoping no one does.
337
00:15:49,003 --> 00:15:50,792
What? I can't hear you
338
00:15:50,793 --> 00:15:52,832
with the babe alarm going off.
339
00:15:52,833 --> 00:15:55,792
Whee-ooh, whee-ooh.
340
00:15:55,793 --> 00:15:59,792
Oh, well, same to you.
341
00:15:59,793 --> 00:16:02,242
What is that, terry cloth?
342
00:16:02,243 --> 00:16:04,832
Actually, we came here to talk to you
343
00:16:04,833 --> 00:16:06,042
because we wanted to ask you
344
00:16:06,043 --> 00:16:07,742
about renting out your back office.
345
00:16:07,743 --> 00:16:09,452
We know you're the big cheese.
346
00:16:09,453 --> 00:16:11,502
You know, since you're here,
347
00:16:11,503 --> 00:16:13,202
maybe we, uh, cut a rug?
348
00:16:13,203 --> 00:16:17,343
She hasn't cut her rug in
about four months, so...
349
00:16:20,043 --> 00:16:22,702
We could, uh, start
off on the dance floor,
350
00:16:22,703 --> 00:16:24,742
and if we happen to end up
351
00:16:24,743 --> 00:16:27,742
in the back of an '86 Cutlass Supreme,
352
00:16:27,743 --> 00:16:30,242
so be it.
353
00:16:30,243 --> 00:16:33,242
So be it. Forget about it.
354
00:16:33,243 --> 00:16:34,662
Excuse us.
355
00:16:34,663 --> 00:16:37,292
Max, I am not a whore.
356
00:16:37,293 --> 00:16:40,872
That's not what your hair,
dress, and makeup say.
357
00:16:40,873 --> 00:16:43,872
Look, you pimped Randy
out for that extra space,
358
00:16:43,873 --> 00:16:45,082
and now it's your turn.
359
00:16:45,083 --> 00:16:47,292
You want that back room, make it happen.
360
00:16:47,293 --> 00:16:49,872
On the count of three,
361
00:16:49,873 --> 00:16:51,973
say "sex."
362
00:16:53,203 --> 00:16:55,042
You handle Angelo.
363
00:16:55,043 --> 00:16:56,872
I've been wanting to kill someone
364
00:16:56,873 --> 00:16:59,452
for using a selfie stick,
and she is the lucky one.
365
00:16:59,453 --> 00:17:02,702
Angie, God rest your soul,
366
00:17:02,703 --> 00:17:05,202
get your hands off my boyfriend.
367
00:17:05,203 --> 00:17:07,412
Max, what're you doing here?
368
00:17:07,413 --> 00:17:09,952
Please tell me that's a wig.
369
00:17:09,953 --> 00:17:11,792
She tricked you into coming here.
370
00:17:11,793 --> 00:17:14,122
She is not in charge of the pizza place.
371
00:17:14,123 --> 00:17:18,002
Her brother is. This is my hair.
372
00:17:18,003 --> 00:17:19,912
Angie, is that true?
373
00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:21,952
Did I do the Electric Slide for nothing?
374
00:17:21,953 --> 00:17:23,542
Well, not for nothing.
375
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:26,912
We came in second in
the dance competition.
376
00:17:26,913 --> 00:17:28,952
Okay, fine, it's true.
377
00:17:28,953 --> 00:17:31,292
Angelo's in charge.
378
00:17:31,293 --> 00:17:33,202
My father thought he was the smarter one
379
00:17:33,203 --> 00:17:35,832
because he wore glasses as a kid.
380
00:17:35,833 --> 00:17:38,742
Randy, are you okay?
381
00:17:38,743 --> 00:17:42,202
Did the bad lady touch you
in any of the good places?
382
00:17:42,203 --> 00:17:44,832
Look, I'm sorry I lied,
383
00:17:44,833 --> 00:17:47,162
but for what it's worth, I'm
having the night of my life.
384
00:17:47,163 --> 00:17:50,542
Believe it or not, I wasn't
popular in high school.
385
00:17:50,543 --> 00:17:52,292
I didn't date a football player
386
00:17:52,293 --> 00:17:55,122
or get pregnant.
387
00:17:55,123 --> 00:17:57,622
For once, I just wanted
to show up a winner.
388
00:17:57,623 --> 00:18:00,332
- Hey, Ange!
- Oh, no.
389
00:18:00,333 --> 00:18:01,792
Here comes Michelle Pascucci.
390
00:18:01,793 --> 00:18:03,973
Please, don't ruin this for me.
391
00:18:05,293 --> 00:18:06,912
Who's this, Ange?
392
00:18:06,913 --> 00:18:09,042
What's she doing holding
on to your fiancé
393
00:18:09,043 --> 00:18:12,263
like he's the last cannoli at a wake?
394
00:18:13,913 --> 00:18:17,002
Forgot to tell you, I got engaged.
395
00:18:17,003 --> 00:18:18,292
Wait.
396
00:18:18,293 --> 00:18:21,042
Unless that's not really your boyfriend.
397
00:18:21,043 --> 00:18:24,872
'Cause, uh, you're known to lie.
398
00:18:24,873 --> 00:18:26,952
Well...
399
00:18:26,953 --> 00:18:29,242
she's not lying.
400
00:18:29,243 --> 00:18:32,502
He's been cheating on
me with her for years.
401
00:18:32,503 --> 00:18:35,893
I, uh, caught 'em at the Olive Garden.
402
00:18:37,873 --> 00:18:40,452
I smell a catfight,
403
00:18:40,453 --> 00:18:43,162
and Drakkar Noir.
404
00:18:43,163 --> 00:18:45,412
Catfight!
405
00:18:45,413 --> 00:18:48,662
- Oh, come here, bitch.
- Oh!
406
00:18:48,663 --> 00:18:51,162
- Just follow my lead.
- Okay, careful.
407
00:18:51,163 --> 00:18:53,202
I spent $65 on my hair.
408
00:18:53,203 --> 00:18:56,002
I was hoping not to
touch it till next week.
409
00:18:56,003 --> 00:18:59,912
- Don't touch my arm, bitch!
- Oh!
410
00:18:59,913 --> 00:19:02,702
Oh, I shouldn't touch your arm?
411
00:19:02,703 --> 00:19:06,002
Maybe you shouldn't touch my guy.
412
00:19:07,953 --> 00:19:10,912
Finally, this party's getting good.
413
00:19:10,913 --> 00:19:12,952
Push me back.
414
00:19:12,953 --> 00:19:14,872
Oh!
415
00:19:14,873 --> 00:19:16,792
Did you just push me?
416
00:19:16,793 --> 00:19:19,702
Yeah, I pushed you,
417
00:19:19,703 --> 00:19:22,832
but not as hard as your boyfriend
418
00:19:22,833 --> 00:19:25,832
was pushing me in the back of the car.
419
00:19:25,833 --> 00:19:28,952
Oh, hell no, bitch!
420
00:19:28,953 --> 00:19:31,242
- Now...
- OH!
421
00:19:31,243 --> 00:19:35,162
I told you not to touch my hair!
422
00:19:35,163 --> 00:19:37,542
- Oh!
- Oh, my God!
423
00:19:37,543 --> 00:19:40,242
She's got a freakin' knife!
424
00:19:40,243 --> 00:19:42,332
All right, I'm out,
425
00:19:42,333 --> 00:19:44,582
but only because...
426
00:19:44,583 --> 00:19:46,452
I'm on parole
427
00:19:46,453 --> 00:19:50,242
for pulling out a woman's
bangs on the F Train.
428
00:19:50,243 --> 00:19:52,452
Let's get out of here, Ange.
429
00:19:52,453 --> 00:19:54,162
Is my hair dented?
430
00:19:54,163 --> 00:19:57,683
I'll fix it, Hun. I got
a chopstick in my purse.
431
00:20:01,243 --> 00:20:03,162
Get over here, you sloppy second.
432
00:20:03,163 --> 00:20:04,582
Wow.
433
00:20:04,583 --> 00:20:07,242
I kind of like having
a knight in shining...
434
00:20:07,243 --> 00:20:09,832
what is this, aluminum foil?
435
00:20:09,833 --> 00:20:12,542
Well, it is warming up the
ravioli I put in my bra.
436
00:20:14,083 --> 00:20:16,242
Max, can I have this dance?
437
00:20:21,663 --> 00:20:24,162
So you think you and I would
have dated in high school?
438
00:20:24,163 --> 00:20:27,082
Well, when I was in high
school, you were in your 30s,
439
00:20:27,083 --> 00:20:28,372
so...
440
00:20:28,373 --> 00:20:30,582
yeah, that sounds right.
441
00:20:30,583 --> 00:20:34,122
I just convinced Angelo to
let us rent the back office.
442
00:20:34,123 --> 00:20:36,662
I mean, I may have to be
his date to the Auto Show.
443
00:20:36,663 --> 00:20:38,582
Wear something nice.
444
00:20:38,583 --> 00:20:40,582
Like a silk blouse
445
00:20:40,583 --> 00:20:42,452
or a bikini.
446
00:20:43,743 --> 00:20:46,162
He wants to show me off.
447
00:20:46,163 --> 00:20:49,952
I never went to anything like this.
448
00:20:49,953 --> 00:20:51,502
A reunion or a prom
449
00:20:51,503 --> 00:20:53,372
or a class.
450
00:20:53,373 --> 00:20:54,832
What do you do at these things?
451
00:21:06,992 --> 00:21:13,992
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