1
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American Dad!
"The Vacation Goo"

2
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Synchro: Superbiagi
Resync : Fogia

3
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www.forom.com

4
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Francine, the meal looks delicious.

5
00:00:35,162 --> 00:00:36,363
Thank you, Klaus.

6
00:00:36,364 --> 00:00:39,906
I'm starting a new family
tradition of Sunday night dinners.

7
00:00:39,907 --> 00:00:41,015
Wunderbar!

8
00:00:41,016 --> 00:00:44,112
Wait, only four place settings?

9
00:00:44,113 --> 00:00:45,893
Oh, no. That-that's cool.
That's cool.

10
00:00:45,896 --> 00:00:48,320
I, I'm, I'm supposed to
hang with my chick anyway.

11
00:00:48,324 --> 00:00:51,438
She's been bugging me to spend more
time with her and she...

12
00:00:51,589 --> 00:00:53,028
doesn't exist.

13
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:55,153
Franny, I need you to run lines with me.

14
00:00:55,159 --> 00:00:57,223
I'm going up for a part
on The Ghost Whisperer.

15
00:00:57,226 --> 00:00:58,740
- What?
- Oh, I didn't tell you?

16
00:00:58,747 --> 00:01:01,361
Yeah, I'm gonna become the
greatest actor of all time.

17
00:01:01,367 --> 00:01:02,702
Okay, let's do this.

18
00:01:03,765 --> 00:01:05,861
"Some say you're a ghost whisperer.

19
00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:08,401
"Well, if you truly
are a ghost whisperer,

20
00:01:08,408 --> 00:01:10,373
then you'll let me
talk to my dead wife!"

21
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Not now, Roger.

22
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Dinner's ready!

23
00:01:16,417 --> 00:01:17,692
Oh, Franny.

24
00:01:17,696 --> 00:01:20,711
It's so awful the way they treat you.

25
00:01:20,717 --> 00:01:22,792
I'm just trying to do
something nice for...

26
00:01:22,796 --> 00:01:24,802
Damn it! I still can't cry on cue.

27
00:01:24,805 --> 00:01:26,022
I'm gonna go work on it.

28
00:01:26,477 --> 00:01:27,673
What, no dinner?

29
00:01:27,677 --> 00:01:29,472
You're a terrible wife and mother.

30
00:01:32,286 --> 00:01:34,731
Everyone ran off last
week before I could explain

31
00:01:34,736 --> 00:01:38,852
the point of Sunday night dinner,
which is to reconnect as a family.

32
00:01:38,946 --> 00:01:41,671
And when your father
gets home, we'll do just that.

33
00:01:44,487 --> 00:01:48,742
Hi, I'll take a roast beef to go and
a medium Mr. Pibb, no ice. Fantastic.

34
00:01:48,755 --> 00:01:52,081
Stan, get inside right now and
have dinner with your family!

35
00:01:52,086 --> 00:01:55,553
Well, if that's your attitude, I don't know
why you people even have a drive-through.

36
00:01:56,566 --> 00:01:58,940
Didn't get Whisperer.
Casting director's a whore.

37
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She hates me, but I'm up for Medium.

38
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The writing's more complex on this one.

39
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"Some say you're a
medium.

40
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"Well, if you truly are a medium, then
you'll let me talk to my dead wife!"

41
00:02:09,697 --> 00:02:11,060
Roger, not now!

42
00:02:11,067 --> 00:02:12,242
Dream killer!

43
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Ahh!

44
00:02:13,807 --> 00:02:15,312
Why can't I cry?

45
00:02:15,876 --> 00:02:20,243
Stan! The family is trying to bond
and we would appreciate your help.

46
00:02:20,245 --> 00:02:21,461
Right, kids?

47
00:02:21,478 --> 00:02:22,453
I can't, Jeff.

48
00:02:22,458 --> 00:02:25,032
I'm having stupid dinner
with my stupid family.

49
00:02:25,037 --> 00:02:27,682
You see, Stan? Our family's drifting apart!

50
00:02:27,688 --> 00:02:31,002
All right, Francine, just relax.
I know exactly what we need.

51
00:02:31,038 --> 00:02:33,432
It's time for a Smith family vacation.

52
00:02:33,438 --> 00:02:35,813
Yeah, we always have the
best time on vacation.

53
00:02:35,817 --> 00:02:37,522
Dad, can we goto Graceland?!

54
00:02:37,527 --> 00:02:39,022
Steve, if you want to pay your respects

55
00:02:39,028 --> 00:02:42,692
to a fat man who died on the toilet,
we can visit your Aunt Mary's grave.

56
00:02:48,755 --> 00:02:50,032
This place is amazing.

57
00:02:50,038 --> 00:02:51,830
I love you all so much.

58
00:02:51,836 --> 00:02:53,281
Family hug!

59
00:02:54,516 --> 00:02:56,042
Ah, you were right, Stan.

60
00:02:56,046 --> 00:02:59,063
This vacation is exactly what we needed.

61
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<i>Hel-lo!</i>

62
00:03:01,917 --> 00:03:03,463
Roger?!

63
00:03:06,697 --> 00:03:09,512
Wakey-wakey, eggs and bakey!

64
00:03:13,348 --> 00:03:14,830
Roger, what's going on?

65
00:03:14,835 --> 00:03:17,571
Oh, I woke you up because I
need to borrow your blue dress.

66
00:03:17,576 --> 00:03:19,801
I've decided to go out
for parts as a woman.

67
00:03:19,807 --> 00:03:21,273
It just came to me, out of nowhere,

68
00:03:21,275 --> 00:03:23,992
when I was watching
Tootsie last night on AMC.

69
00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:25,700
Then they showed Arachnophia.

70
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Not what I would call an
"American Movie Classic."

71
00:03:28,695 --> 00:03:31,551
No, Roger. Why are we in these things?.

72
00:03:31,555 --> 00:03:34,480
Oh. The goo.Yeah.

73
00:03:34,616 --> 00:03:38,783
Well, every year, Stan checks out these
artificial memory chambers from the CIA,

74
00:03:38,807 --> 00:03:42,072
plops you suckers in and
then programs a great vacancy.

75
00:03:42,408 --> 00:03:44,400
This year's Maui. Sweet.

76
00:03:44,406 --> 00:03:47,243
Did you get me one of
those"Hang Loose" T-shirts?

77
00:03:47,247 --> 00:03:48,871
See? 'Cause you didn't really go.

78
00:03:48,877 --> 00:03:52,371
But if we're in here, where's Stan?

79
00:03:52,857 --> 00:03:53,960
Come on, Georgetown!

80
00:03:53,967 --> 00:03:55,461
Hoy-as!
Hoy-as!

81
00:03:55,467 --> 00:03:58,370
Hoy-as,
Hoy-as, Hoy-as.

82
00:03:58,427 --> 00:04:00,683
Hoy-as,
Hoy-as, Hoy--

83
00:04:02,065 --> 00:04:05,153
There's an old German saying:
"Don't blame the fish."

84
00:04:05,258 --> 00:04:09,150
There are other sayings, but
they, um, mostly involve genocide.

85
00:04:12,467 --> 00:04:14,011
Let me get this straight.

86
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All our vacantions, the only thing

87
00:04:16,017 --> 00:04:20,731
that ever brought this family together
have been a big, fat, fake lie?

88
00:04:20,767 --> 00:04:21,872
Yes!

89
00:04:22,297 --> 00:04:24,150
Yes to you, and yes to the game.

90
00:04:24,256 --> 00:04:26,201
How did you get us into those vats?

91
00:04:26,206 --> 00:04:30,791
Well, uh, remember how every year I
cook our annual pre-vacation pancakes?

92
00:04:31,205 --> 00:04:35,071
Stan, aren't you excited to
go to the Galapagos Islands?

93
00:04:36,018 --> 00:04:37,112
Can't wait.

94
00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,703
Now, eat up.

95
00:04:44,898 --> 00:04:47,771
Then I gingerly carry
your bodies downstairs...

96
00:04:49,255 --> 00:04:53,911
...strip you down, put you in the goo and
program the greatest family vacation ever.

97
00:04:55,047 --> 00:04:59,323
So, that time in Mexico, when you and I went
hang gliding and you told me you loved me?

98
00:04:59,325 --> 00:05:00,903
Neither of those things ever happened.

99
00:05:00,905 --> 00:05:02,532
Why would you do this?

100
00:05:02,536 --> 00:05:04,562
Well, I wanted you all
to have good memories,

101
00:05:04,578 --> 00:05:07,802
but my idea of a vacation is a
vacation away from you people.

102
00:05:07,805 --> 00:05:09,250
That's terrible!

103
00:05:09,255 --> 00:05:13,593
Stan, we are going on a real vacation
and this family is going to bond!

104
00:05:13,596 --> 00:05:15,260
We could go skiing!

105
00:05:15,267 --> 00:05:16,700
Or, here's analternate pitch.

106
00:05:16,705 --> 00:05:18,590
Uh, stay here, watch the Duke game...

107
00:05:18,595 --> 00:05:21,401
Just hear me out... I order
boneless wings from KFC...

108
00:05:21,407 --> 00:05:22,483
Hang on to that thought...

109
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I take a long bath and then, wait
for it...none of you are here.

110
00:05:26,928 --> 00:05:28,680
Or... just hear me out...

111
00:05:28,687 --> 00:05:31,291
we stay home and for the
rest of our lives together,

112
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every time you doze offI
slam a book on your testicles.

113
00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:37,470
Did someone say skiing?!

114
00:05:37,475 --> 00:05:39,471
Yes. I, I did.

115
00:05:45,415 --> 00:05:46,833
I'm so nervous.

116
00:05:46,835 --> 00:05:48,793
This is my first soap opera audition.

117
00:05:48,795 --> 00:05:50,330
Oh, my God, I didn't see you there!

118
00:05:50,338 --> 00:05:52,680
You make absolutely
no impression at all.

119
00:05:53,438 --> 00:05:55,761
Betty Bea Getty McClanahan?

120
00:05:55,766 --> 00:05:56,953
We're ready for you.

121
00:05:56,958 --> 00:05:59,262
- Good luck.
- Oh! Oh! You did it again.

122
00:05:59,288 --> 00:06:02,152
Darling, I swear, put a bell
around your neck or something.

123
00:06:03,298 --> 00:06:06,822
Yes, Mr. Shershow, I may have
left Sunrise Valley a girl,

124
00:06:06,838 --> 00:06:10,263
but I can assure you I return
a confident, sexy woman,

125
00:06:10,275 --> 00:06:13,521
who can shoe a horse
and please her man!

126
00:06:13,628 --> 00:06:16,713
Yes! We have found our Miss Fiona.

127
00:06:16,715 --> 00:06:18,582
My dream has come true.

128
00:06:18,587 --> 00:06:20,682
You humble me. I am humbled.

129
00:06:20,736 --> 00:06:21,831
Excuse me.

130
00:06:22,488 --> 00:06:25,093
Go home, bitches!
Show's over! I nailed it!

131
00:06:29,067 --> 00:06:30,343
Oh, what a day.

132
00:06:30,345 --> 00:06:32,411
Perfect powder, the slopes were empty.

133
00:06:32,418 --> 00:06:33,863
Family hug!

134
00:06:35,886 --> 00:06:39,353
Sorry, I need this outlet to plug in
the "Tempest"machine I bought on eBay.

135
00:06:39,358 --> 00:06:40,292
Stan!

136
00:06:40,295 --> 00:06:42,451
I didn't do this. Where's Steve?

137
00:06:42,458 --> 00:06:45,341
Don't get me wrong, I
like the Berenstein Bears.

138
00:06:45,346 --> 00:06:47,431
I just wouldn't want one of
them marrying my daughter.

139
00:06:47,648 --> 00:06:48,793
Hmm. Indeed.

140
00:06:48,795 --> 00:06:49,942
Steve!

141
00:06:49,956 --> 00:06:52,092
How could you put us in the goo?

142
00:06:52,098 --> 00:06:53,770
Dad had the right idea.

143
00:06:53,777 --> 00:06:55,790
I need time away from you people, too.

144
00:06:55,794 --> 00:06:57,488
Okay, enough of this.

145
00:06:57,489 --> 00:07:00,098
Clearly the men in this
house can't be trusted.

146
00:07:00,130 --> 00:07:03,413
Hayley, come on.
You and I are gonna plan a real trip.

147
00:07:04,379 --> 00:07:05,930
You undressed me?

148
00:07:05,935 --> 00:07:07,812
Huh? Oh, no. Toshi did.

149
00:07:12,787 --> 00:07:14,802
It's so hot, Brock.

150
00:07:14,805 --> 00:07:17,061
Oh, you'll get used to it, Miss Fiona.

151
00:07:17,106 --> 00:07:19,150
Well, I... I'm pregnant!

152
00:07:19,156 --> 00:07:20,300
Pregnant!

153
00:07:20,305 --> 00:07:22,842
Wah... Wah...

154
00:07:22,875 --> 00:07:24,420
<i>Cut!</i>

155
00:07:24,455 --> 00:07:25,731
What the hell, Jerry?!

156
00:07:25,736 --> 00:07:28,240
I need you to make the crying
a little more convincing.

157
00:07:28,245 --> 00:07:29,520
You think I can't cry?

158
00:07:29,528 --> 00:07:30,621
I can cry.

159
00:07:30,626 --> 00:07:32,353
I cried when I read this dreck.

160
00:07:32,358 --> 00:07:34,880
Who wrote it, an illiterate
Irishman's Polish monkey?

161
00:07:34,885 --> 00:07:36,010
Uh, I did,

162
00:07:36,618 --> 00:07:37,541
I quit.

163
00:07:37,548 --> 00:07:40,643
If you quit, I'll see to it you
never workin this town again.

164
00:07:41,797 --> 00:07:44,803
Let me explain you something
about showbusiness, Jerry.

165
00:07:44,805 --> 00:07:48,410
It's a business and I am the
greatest actor of all time.

166
00:07:48,437 --> 00:07:50,150
- What's your name?
- Parker.

167
00:07:50,716 --> 00:07:52,512
Lunch was late today!

168
00:07:56,425 --> 00:08:01,120
Attach stabilizing rod
B to ankle constraint A.

169
00:08:01,128 --> 00:08:03,573
We should have just paid
the guy to put this together.

170
00:08:03,575 --> 00:08:04,702
<i>Hayley!</i>

171
00:08:05,306 --> 00:08:07,911
I can't believe you put us in the goo.

172
00:08:07,978 --> 00:08:11,303
What's the big deal? We planned to
go to Italy, so I sent you to Italy.

173
00:08:11,307 --> 00:08:13,142
You're missing the point!

174
00:08:13,257 --> 00:08:16,081
All I wanted was to have
dinner once in a while

175
00:08:16,098 --> 00:08:18,971
and spend some real time
together, but you know what?

176
00:08:18,978 --> 00:08:21,401
I'm done. Done!
And you know why?

177
00:08:21,407 --> 00:08:24,053
Because you are an ass family.

178
00:08:24,058 --> 00:08:26,293
If someone asked me
who lived in this house,

179
00:08:26,298 --> 00:08:28,690
I'd say "the Asses!"and I'd be right!

180
00:08:28,695 --> 00:08:30,470
I just... I don't...

181
00:08:30,768 --> 00:08:33,322
I don't know why it has to...

182
00:08:37,575 --> 00:08:40,533
Hey, Mr. S, you want to help
strap me into this thing?

183
00:08:43,565 --> 00:08:46,231
Francine, you were right.
We've been horrible.

184
00:08:46,238 --> 00:08:47,543
But we're gonna make it up to you.

185
00:08:47,548 --> 00:08:49,892
We booked a cruise and
we're leaving in an hour.

186
00:08:49,908 --> 00:08:51,892
You're just gonna put me in the goo.

187
00:08:51,895 --> 00:08:53,761
No, we're not. Honey, look.

188
00:08:53,768 --> 00:08:56,503
I'm returning the goo
chambers to the CIA.

189
00:08:56,856 --> 00:09:00,243
Ma'am! Don't get any of that goo
on you, it'll rot out your womb!

190
00:09:00,946 --> 00:09:04,631
Oh, my God, we are
going on a real vacation!

191
00:09:04,638 --> 00:09:08,880
The only goo you're gonna
see is "goo-d" times.

192
00:09:09,097 --> 00:09:11,333
It was a stretch, but I
made it work, didn't I, kids?

193
00:09:11,338 --> 00:09:13,300
- No.
- That's right.

194
00:09:21,625 --> 00:09:26,571
Remember, the winning family gets
100 cruise points, no cash value!

195
00:09:26,576 --> 00:09:30,000
I want those valueless cruise points.

196
00:09:32,038 --> 00:09:33,381
Smiths win!

197
00:09:33,388 --> 00:09:34,430
Yes!

198
00:09:34,435 --> 00:09:37,210
I'm gonna go sign us up
for face-painting class.

199
00:09:37,216 --> 00:09:39,080
Steve, you're gonna be a rabbit.

200
00:09:39,085 --> 00:09:43,482
Hayley, you're gonna be a
squirrel, and I'm gonna be a panda!

201
00:09:45,775 --> 00:09:47,910
I can't take this cruise anymore.

202
00:09:47,915 --> 00:09:50,462
I'll tell you something:
I am at my limit!

203
00:09:50,467 --> 00:09:53,360
Here is the line, and
here's face painting, 'kay?

204
00:09:53,366 --> 00:09:55,290
Yeah, yeah, try and paint my face.

205
00:09:55,295 --> 00:09:57,223
Come at me with a
brush, see what happens.

206
00:09:57,227 --> 00:09:58,610
I miss the goo.

207
00:09:58,628 --> 00:10:01,243
Kids, I know this is torture,
but we owe it to your mother

208
00:10:01,245 --> 00:10:03,301
to pretend to have a
great time as a family.

209
00:10:03,305 --> 00:10:04,501
So let's turn it up a notch.

210
00:10:04,506 --> 00:10:06,030
- Okay.
- Fine.

211
00:10:06,038 --> 00:10:07,592
Come on, Hayley, let's go to the bar.

212
00:10:07,598 --> 00:10:10,132
Steve, you stay here and
cool off with a charley horse.

213
00:10:10,136 --> 00:10:10,841
Huh?

214
00:10:14,076 --> 00:10:16,661
Hi, I'm Becky, cruise
activities director.

215
00:10:16,668 --> 00:10:17,730
I'm Steve.

216
00:10:17,735 --> 00:10:21,311
I have five friends on MySpace and
I'm waiting for approval from a sixth.

217
00:10:21,315 --> 00:10:22,991
- You're cute.
- Oh.

218
00:10:23,058 --> 00:10:25,331
In a harmless little
brother kind of way, right?

219
00:10:25,336 --> 00:10:29,013
No, in an "I've taken a lot of
boys' virginity" kind of way.

220
00:10:37,675 --> 00:10:39,362
What a day for our family!

221
00:10:39,506 --> 00:10:40,902
Family!

222
00:10:41,266 --> 00:10:43,821
You guys sure are having a good time.

223
00:10:43,825 --> 00:10:45,710
Of course we are!
That's what families do!

224
00:10:45,718 --> 00:10:47,841
They have good times! To family!

225
00:10:47,848 --> 00:10:49,143
Family!

226
00:10:49,147 --> 00:10:50,721
Francine, guess what tonight is?

227
00:10:50,728 --> 00:10:53,420
Sunday. We're about to finally have

228
00:10:53,428 --> 00:10:55,740
that special Sunday
night dinner you wanted.

229
00:10:55,746 --> 00:10:58,172
Hi, Steve. Want to introduce
me to your family?

230
00:10:58,248 --> 00:10:59,490
Family!

231
00:11:00,068 --> 00:11:01,502
Why didn't you guys do it that time?

232
00:11:01,507 --> 00:11:02,662
I thought we were done with it.

233
00:11:04,066 --> 00:11:05,801
Hey, everyone, this is Becky.

234
00:11:05,818 --> 00:11:07,120
She works on the boat.

235
00:11:07,127 --> 00:11:09,643
Your son is 14 going on me.

236
00:11:09,647 --> 00:11:12,020
Okay, something's not right here.

237
00:11:12,028 --> 00:11:14,901
You're all too happy,
you keep yelling "Family!"

238
00:11:15,266 --> 00:11:16,683
Family!

239
00:11:16,968 --> 00:11:18,192
How does it feel?

240
00:11:18,195 --> 00:11:19,310
Not so good, huh?

241
00:11:19,315 --> 00:11:21,913
And now a thin girl is crazy for Steve?

242
00:11:21,915 --> 00:11:23,481
Uh-uh. I don't buy it.

243
00:11:23,485 --> 00:11:25,371
You put me in the goo again.

244
00:11:25,376 --> 00:11:28,510
Francine, I swear on the lives
of our future grandchildren

245
00:11:28,517 --> 00:11:31,433
that only Steve will be able
to give us, this is real.

246
00:11:31,437 --> 00:11:35,121
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
Fantastic Cruises Dinner Theater

247
00:11:35,127 --> 00:11:38,530
proudly presents some poor soul
on the downswing of their career

248
00:11:38,535 --> 00:11:41,920
doing "A Tribute to
Olivia Newton-John!"

249
00:11:54,675 --> 00:11:56,390
Here you go, ma'am.
I talked to the chef.

250
00:11:56,398 --> 00:11:58,561
There's no cream in the
soup, just like you asked for.

251
00:12:00,258 --> 00:12:04,400
Roger's playing Olivia Newton-John
on our cruise ship?!

252
00:12:04,406 --> 00:12:07,271
Oh, this has goo written all over it!

253
00:12:07,276 --> 00:12:09,753
Honey, no! You saw them
take those machines away.

254
00:12:09,755 --> 00:12:11,131
I promise, this is real.

255
00:12:11,138 --> 00:12:14,623
Oh, yeah? Well, if it's real,
then I probably shouldn't do this.

256
00:12:17,477 --> 00:12:19,430
I'm sorry, sir.
She thinks she's in the goo.

257
00:12:19,437 --> 00:12:20,803
Francine came back here!

258
00:12:27,118 --> 00:12:28,811
Mom, get down from there!

259
00:12:28,886 --> 00:12:31,902
I'll see you all in the
living room in a minute!

260
00:12:32,626 --> 00:12:35,203
I'm in the goo!

261
00:12:37,768 --> 00:12:39,643
You're not in the goo!

262
00:12:39,795 --> 00:12:41,680
And you have the room key!

263
00:12:45,308 --> 00:12:47,362
Becky, thanks for
getting us this lifeboat.

264
00:12:47,366 --> 00:12:48,782
I mean, life boobs.

265
00:12:48,786 --> 00:12:50,511
Wait...no, no, I was right.

266
00:12:52,367 --> 00:12:53,960
<i>Stan!</i>

267
00:12:56,267 --> 00:12:59,112
Oh, Francine! Thank God you're okay.

268
00:12:59,116 --> 00:13:03,432
You know, while I was out
there, I made a promise to God.

269
00:13:03,436 --> 00:13:07,040
I said, if He saved me,
I'd dedicate my life to Him.

270
00:13:07,767 --> 00:13:09,972
Obviously, I'm not going to do that.

271
00:13:09,977 --> 00:13:12,180
I'm starved. Did you bring any food?

272
00:13:12,185 --> 00:13:14,232
Didn't need to. The
ship's got plenty of food.

273
00:13:14,246 --> 00:13:16,940
Oh, so you told the
ship to come back for us?

274
00:13:17,826 --> 00:13:20,391
Yeah... that would've been the call.

275
00:13:20,397 --> 00:13:22,313
I'm sure Roger will
get them to come back.

276
00:13:24,396 --> 00:13:26,690
How dare you treat a lady like this!

277
00:13:26,697 --> 00:13:28,492
We caught you stealing silverware.

278
00:13:28,495 --> 00:13:30,442
I did nothing of the kind!

279
00:13:32,127 --> 00:13:34,343
Okay, okay, I took your silverware.

280
00:13:34,346 --> 00:13:38,733
But, in all fairness, you ran out of the
mango shrimp salad two brunches in a row.

281
00:13:38,738 --> 00:13:40,181
So who's the real thief here?

282
00:13:40,188 --> 00:13:41,781
Both. Both of us.

283
00:13:44,995 --> 00:13:47,193
You seem to be in distress.

284
00:13:47,195 --> 00:13:49,320
I just can't catch a break.

285
00:13:49,346 --> 00:13:51,471
And I don't have any money to get home.

286
00:13:51,477 --> 00:13:54,912
You know, I'm an actress,
and I'm amazing.

287
00:13:54,968 --> 00:13:58,323
Really? My cousin runs a
small performance space.

288
00:13:58,345 --> 00:13:59,480
Perhaps he could use you.

289
00:13:59,486 --> 00:14:02,210
Ooh, the theater!
That's where I cut my teeth.

290
00:14:02,235 --> 00:14:04,632
Trottin' the boards with Phil...

291
00:14:04,736 --> 00:14:06,582
Seymour Hoffman.

292
00:14:07,417 --> 00:14:09,381
Oh, "shantay."

293
00:14:16,057 --> 00:14:17,681
Oh, Equus!

294
00:14:24,867 --> 00:14:26,982
We haven't eaten in four days.

295
00:14:27,006 --> 00:14:29,840
Damn it, Mom, why couldn't you
jump off the boat after dinner?

296
00:14:29,847 --> 00:14:30,972
This isn't my fault.

297
00:14:30,976 --> 00:14:33,472
I just wanted us to
spend sometime together!

298
00:14:33,837 --> 00:14:35,471
Steve's hiding food!

299
00:14:35,487 --> 00:14:38,221
No! It's just a picture
I took with some grapes.

300
00:14:38,226 --> 00:14:40,552
- Give it to me!
- Share it! You have to share it!

301
00:14:42,256 --> 00:14:43,551
No!

302
00:14:43,605 --> 00:14:46,072
What are we going to do
for pictures of food now?!

303
00:14:46,078 --> 00:14:47,093
Look!

304
00:14:50,335 --> 00:14:51,463
A house.

305
00:14:51,487 --> 00:14:52,763
We're saved!

306
00:14:52,867 --> 00:14:54,570
I'm going to go check out the situation.

307
00:14:54,578 --> 00:14:57,101
And you guys can check
out my ass as I walk away.

308
00:14:57,207 --> 00:14:58,210
I think you'll be pleased.

309
00:15:01,177 --> 00:15:02,790
Hi. We landed on your beach.

310
00:15:02,797 --> 00:15:04,751
They better have food up there.

311
00:15:04,897 --> 00:15:08,070
If they have any chocolate sauce,
I'll let you lick it off me.

312
00:15:08,096 --> 00:15:09,233
Oh, no, thanks.

313
00:15:09,238 --> 00:15:10,993
My mom doesn't like me to eat chocolate.

314
00:15:10,998 --> 00:15:13,990
But maybe some nice carob
paste or some hummus?

315
00:15:14,365 --> 00:15:15,522
Okay, here's the deal:

316
00:15:15,527 --> 00:15:17,331
- they're going to hunt us.
- What?

317
00:15:17,338 --> 00:15:19,463
The guy said we had a
20-minute head start,

318
00:15:19,467 --> 00:15:21,470
and then they're going to
hunt us down like animals.

319
00:15:21,476 --> 00:15:22,823
That doesn't sound right.

320
00:15:22,835 --> 00:15:26,351
Yeah, now that I said it out loud,
it does sound a little strange.

321
00:15:26,358 --> 00:15:28,372
I'm going to go see what's going on.

322
00:15:31,297 --> 00:15:33,330
Hi. I'm Francine.

323
00:15:33,357 --> 00:15:39,133
My husband seems to think that you
are going to hunt us down like animals.

324
00:15:39,157 --> 00:15:40,221
Yep.

325
00:15:46,038 --> 00:15:47,432
Okay, then.

326
00:15:48,045 --> 00:15:51,392
Look, that cloud there looks like
one of those old-fashioned phones.

327
00:15:51,395 --> 00:15:55,501
Yeah, and that string of clouds
next to it looks like the cord.

328
00:15:55,505 --> 00:15:58,380
Yes, that's a good addition.
That does look like a cord.

329
00:15:58,386 --> 00:16:00,823
It's real! It's real! Get out of my way!

330
00:16:39,428 --> 00:16:41,872
- I'm exhausted.
- I'm starving.

331
00:16:41,875 --> 00:16:43,502
- Steve has a charley horse.
- Huh?

332
00:16:45,207 --> 00:16:47,173
We should all spend
the night here and rest.

333
00:16:47,855 --> 00:16:49,453
Mr. Smith, you light a fire,

334
00:16:49,455 --> 00:16:52,601
and I'll... I'll catch rain water
with one of these plant leaves.

335
00:16:55,205 --> 00:16:56,171
Becky!

336
00:17:00,756 --> 00:17:02,671
- She's gone.
- No!

337
00:17:02,676 --> 00:17:04,762
- We're trapped!
- I'll get us out.

338
00:17:06,586 --> 00:17:08,842
Oh! I'm too weak from hunger.

339
00:17:08,858 --> 00:17:11,900
I used my last bit of energy
giving Steve that charley horse.

340
00:17:12,177 --> 00:17:13,063
Worth it.

341
00:17:13,066 --> 00:17:14,490
We are going to die in here!

342
00:17:14,498 --> 00:17:17,720
I can't believe starving to
death is how I'm going out.

343
00:17:17,788 --> 00:17:20,151
I thought for sure I'd
shoot myself in my study.

344
00:17:20,155 --> 00:17:22,603
Stop it! No one is going to die.

345
00:17:22,607 --> 00:17:26,010
But, mom, there's no way out, and
there's nothing in this cave we can eat.

346
00:17:26,086 --> 00:17:29,090
Actually, there is one thing.

347
00:17:29,615 --> 00:17:31,093
Good Lord, Francine!

348
00:17:31,097 --> 00:17:33,900
Oh, my God, Mom, that's disgusting!

349
00:17:33,916 --> 00:17:35,143
Of course it is.

350
00:17:35,148 --> 00:17:38,602
But I'm not going to stand
by and watch my family perish!

351
00:17:38,665 --> 00:17:41,890
This is the first real vacation 
we've taken together,

352
00:17:41,896 --> 00:17:44,602
and it sure as hell is
not going to be the last!

353
00:17:44,605 --> 00:17:45,842
Now, who's with me?

354
00:17:45,846 --> 00:17:47,783
Francine, you've clearly gone insane.

355
00:17:47,797 --> 00:17:49,710
I'm not even going to
entertain that idea.

356
00:17:49,916 --> 00:17:52,362
Kids, you want to play "20
Questions" until we die?

357
00:17:52,376 --> 00:17:53,502
I'm thinking of a person.

358
00:17:53,505 --> 00:17:54,873
- Ronald Reagan?
- Damn!

359
00:17:59,888 --> 00:18:01,152
Is this a nickel?

360
00:18:01,158 --> 00:18:02,671
Someone threw a nickel!

361
00:18:02,726 --> 00:18:04,062
Oh! Oh! Cold!

362
00:18:05,065 --> 00:18:06,703
Eddie, what's become of me?

363
00:18:06,707 --> 00:18:09,231
I was going to be the
greatest actor of all time,

364
00:18:09,235 --> 00:18:11,341
but instead, I've hit rock bottom.

365
00:18:11,348 --> 00:18:14,201
Actually, this is the bottom.

366
00:18:16,655 --> 00:18:18,163
Meet Seņor Hidalgo.

367
00:18:18,176 --> 00:18:21,122
You will be having unpleasant
sex with him tonight.

368
00:18:21,128 --> 00:18:22,843
What? Oh, my God!

369
00:18:22,848 --> 00:18:25,440
This can't be happening.
What am I doing here?

370
00:18:25,458 --> 00:18:27,852
I... I miss my house. I miss my family.

371
00:18:27,858 --> 00:18:29,303
I just want to go home.

372
00:18:29,316 --> 00:18:32,920
I just want to close my eyes and,
when I open them, I'll be home, okay?

373
00:18:33,856 --> 00:18:37,122
Seņorita, no, no. Do not cry.

374
00:18:37,315 --> 00:18:40,112
Never before have I been so moved.

375
00:18:40,116 --> 00:18:41,892
Here. Take this money.

376
00:18:41,927 --> 00:18:45,071
Go... Go start a new life for yourself,

377
00:18:45,137 --> 00:18:48,663
far away from this place
and my indiscriminate boner.

378
00:18:48,935 --> 00:18:50,871
Oh, thank you.Thank you, sir!

379
00:18:50,877 --> 00:18:52,700
Bless you! Bless you!

380
00:18:54,347 --> 00:18:57,623
I did it. I can finally cry on cue.

381
00:18:57,676 --> 00:19:00,543
I truly am the greatest
actor of all time!

382
00:19:00,548 --> 00:19:02,691
Oh, thank God I'm out of that jam.

383
00:19:03,015 --> 00:19:03,761
Whew!

384
00:19:03,768 --> 00:19:05,550
Gonna be a long trip home.

385
00:19:05,656 --> 00:19:07,933
Maybe I'll just stop in
here for a little drink.

386
00:19:17,525 --> 00:19:19,843
Okay, that's it.
Let's do it. Let's eat her.

387
00:19:19,858 --> 00:19:20,771
Steve!

388
00:19:20,777 --> 00:19:24,053
Stan, he's choosing life.
There's no shame in that.

389
00:19:24,426 --> 00:19:25,333
Hayley!

390
00:19:25,337 --> 00:19:27,923
I've eaten macrobiotic
burritos. I can eat this.

391
00:19:27,928 --> 00:19:31,282
Stan, we either do this
as a family or not at all.

392
00:19:31,288 --> 00:19:34,250
No! Don't you get it?
She's a human being!

393
00:19:34,288 --> 00:19:36,370
A human being with a name!

394
00:19:36,376 --> 00:19:38,353
Becky Arangino. She's from Seattle.

395
00:19:38,356 --> 00:19:40,213
She's five-foot-four.
She's...

396
00:19:40,715 --> 00:19:42,481
an organ donor.

397
00:19:47,377 --> 00:19:48,872
Okay, I'll say it.

398
00:19:48,878 --> 00:19:50,923
I'll say what we're all thinking.

399
00:19:51,317 --> 00:19:53,843
We ate a person. We did.

400
00:19:54,017 --> 00:19:55,492
But I'll say another thing.

401
00:19:55,867 --> 00:20:00,313
It's Sunday night, and we
finally had a family dinner.

402
00:20:00,318 --> 00:20:01,520
And you know what?

403
00:20:01,526 --> 00:20:02,902
It was nice.

404
00:20:02,906 --> 00:20:03,772
<i>Ready?</i>

405
00:20:23,356 --> 00:20:24,800
It's paint.

406
00:20:26,118 --> 00:20:27,542
All right! Yeah!

407
00:20:27,688 --> 00:20:29,223
Red team wins!

408
00:20:29,226 --> 00:20:30,300
We're not dead.

409
00:20:30,306 --> 00:20:33,663
Of course not. No one
dies here at Jimmy Buffet's

410
00:20:33,666 --> 00:20:36,030
Most Dangerous Game Family Retreat.

411
00:20:40,007 --> 00:20:42,082
Man, it took us two days to find you.

412
00:20:42,096 --> 00:20:43,733
You must be starving!

413
00:20:43,735 --> 00:20:45,140
Hey, weren't there five of you?

414
00:20:46,276 --> 00:20:47,221
Well...

415
00:20:47,378 --> 00:20:52,251
Nothing bonds a family
like a dark, horrible secret.

416
00:20:52,258 --> 00:20:55,453
So where do you guys
want to go next year?

417
00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:00,953
To the goo!

418
00:21:01,077 --> 00:21:02,470
To the goo!

419
00:21:08,208 --> 00:21:09,432
Synchro: Superbiagi
Resync : Fogia
www.forom.com



0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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