1
00:00:01,211 --> 00:00:04,240
Dude, check this out.
2
00:00:04,266 --> 00:00:06,306
Yet another great idea for the strip club.
3
00:00:06,334 --> 00:00:08,068
Guy walks in, rents one of these,
4
00:00:08,136 --> 00:00:10,096
sees a stripper that he likes, right?
5
00:00:10,138 --> 00:00:12,506
And... boom!
6
00:00:12,574 --> 00:00:14,575
Makes it rain.
7
00:00:17,179 --> 00:00:18,712
Awesome. All I need now
8
00:00:18,780 --> 00:00:20,748
is a dollar vacuum for the strippers
9
00:00:20,816 --> 00:00:22,736
and the whole process is automated.
10
00:00:24,486 --> 00:00:25,853
And you really think this is
gonna move you up in the company?
11
00:00:25,921 --> 00:00:28,422
This is the tip of the iceberg.
Chew on this one...
12
00:00:28,490 --> 00:00:30,391
credit card swiper
13
00:00:30,458 --> 00:00:32,059
right between the stripper's boobs.
14
00:00:32,127 --> 00:00:34,228
Think about it, right? No cash, no problem.
15
00:00:35,997 --> 00:00:37,064
Beep.
16
00:00:38,433 --> 00:00:40,234
And if you get declined by the boobs,
17
00:00:40,302 --> 00:00:42,583
you can always try the butt.
18
00:00:44,873 --> 00:00:47,374
"Try the butt."
19
00:00:49,077 --> 00:00:50,945
- So, we gonna do lunch today?
- Sure.
20
00:00:51,012 --> 00:00:53,347
- Pick me up at the club?
- No problem.
21
00:00:53,415 --> 00:00:55,115
Hey, listen. Last time I was there,
22
00:00:55,183 --> 00:00:56,383
I was talkin' to one of your dancers...
23
00:00:56,451 --> 00:00:57,718
No! Not allowed.
24
00:00:57,786 --> 00:00:59,546
You don't even know what I was gonna say.
25
00:00:59,554 --> 00:01:01,255
Yeah, you wanna ask her out,
bring her back to your house,
26
00:01:01,323 --> 00:01:02,723
and have all kinds of sex with her?
27
00:01:02,791 --> 00:01:04,491
Well, not necessarily.
28
00:01:04,559 --> 00:01:07,528
Her house is always an option.
29
00:01:07,596 --> 00:01:09,263
Strippers aren't allowed
to date customers, man.
30
00:01:09,331 --> 00:01:10,698
I'm sorry. Especially not one of my friends.
31
00:01:10,765 --> 00:01:12,666
Are you kidding me?
I'd get my ass handed to me.
32
00:01:12,734 --> 00:01:16,470
Even though you invented
the blow-your-wad cannon?
33
00:01:16,538 --> 00:01:18,472
I mean they can't fire a guy
34
00:01:18,540 --> 00:01:21,709
if he wins the Nobel Prize for science.
35
00:01:21,776 --> 00:01:23,911
- Nope.
- All right. Fine, fine.
36
00:01:23,979 --> 00:01:25,846
But I gotta tell ya,
37
00:01:25,922 --> 00:01:29,163
for an inventor,
you have very little imagination.
38
00:01:33,154 --> 00:01:34,788
- Hey, Charlie.
- Hey.
39
00:01:34,856 --> 00:01:36,457
What are you doing here?
40
00:01:36,524 --> 00:01:38,125
I am picking Sean up for lunch.
41
00:01:38,193 --> 00:01:39,793
By the way, nice outfit.
42
00:01:39,861 --> 00:01:42,261
I did not know that you were a veteran.
43
00:01:43,765 --> 00:01:45,799
So... we still on for tomorrow night?
44
00:01:45,867 --> 00:01:47,701
Ah, damn, sweetie, I'd love to,
45
00:01:47,769 --> 00:01:50,089
but Sean says it's against the rules.
46
00:01:50,138 --> 00:01:52,306
Well...
47
00:01:52,679 --> 00:01:54,046
what about my rule?
48
00:01:54,113 --> 00:01:55,981
The... what... what rule is that?
49
00:01:56,049 --> 00:01:57,382
That you and I are supposed to go out
50
00:01:57,450 --> 00:01:59,151
and have crazy sex all night long.
51
00:01:59,219 --> 00:02:01,500
I... I... I didn't know that was a rule.
52
00:02:01,521 --> 00:02:04,189
We can't break that rule.
53
00:02:04,257 --> 00:02:06,091
No, we can't.
54
00:02:06,159 --> 00:02:07,593
Otherwise, we'll get in trouble.
55
00:02:07,660 --> 00:02:09,361
Well, I don't want to get in trouble.
56
00:02:09,429 --> 00:02:11,563
I'm up for Strip Club Citizen of the Year.
57
00:02:11,631 --> 00:02:15,167
I hear you get a key to
something really nice.
58
00:02:15,232 --> 00:02:19,178
sync and corrections by dreaMaker7
www.addic7ed.com
59
00:02:19,272 --> 00:02:21,240
So... Sean's talking about
60
00:02:21,307 --> 00:02:23,387
putting the credit card swiper where?
61
00:02:24,711 --> 00:02:26,545
- Here.
- Hmm.
62
00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:28,447
Ah, didn't read.
63
00:02:28,514 --> 00:02:30,582
Would you mind pushing those together?
64
00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,684
( chuckles )
65
00:02:32,752 --> 00:02:35,487
You know, Sean has some pretty
good ideas for the club,
66
00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:38,724
but honestly,
I think I'd be a better manager.
67
00:02:38,791 --> 00:02:41,560
Well, to your credit, you're really focused.
68
00:02:41,628 --> 00:02:43,795
You don't quit until the job is finished.
69
00:02:43,863 --> 00:02:47,666
- And your customer service is impeccable.
- ( Chuckles )
70
00:02:47,734 --> 00:02:50,435
And I'm innovative.
71
00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:52,404
What if we put the credit card swiper...
72
00:02:52,472 --> 00:02:54,306
here?
73
00:02:54,374 --> 00:02:56,141
You know what the best part about this is?
74
00:02:56,209 --> 00:02:57,643
I'm gettin' airline miles.
75
00:02:57,710 --> 00:02:59,611
Mm.
76
00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:01,880
( sighs ) Charlie's not coming.
77
00:03:03,483 --> 00:03:05,083
I say we should go ahead and eat.
78
00:03:05,151 --> 00:03:06,985
Wait, maybe this is a test.
79
00:03:07,053 --> 00:03:09,054
Maybe he's watchin' us on a hidden camera
80
00:03:09,122 --> 00:03:11,082
to see if we're talkin' about him.
81
00:03:13,393 --> 00:03:16,161
( loudly ) Charlie is
the best therapist ever.
82
00:03:16,229 --> 00:03:19,031
And he would be the best,
best therapist ever
83
00:03:19,098 --> 00:03:21,099
if he took us to Magic Mountain.
84
00:03:23,236 --> 00:03:24,970
By the way, uh,
85
00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,638
thanks for pitching in for the food...
86
00:03:26,706 --> 00:03:28,507
everyone who isn't Lacey.
87
00:03:28,574 --> 00:03:30,442
Hey! I haven't worked in months.
88
00:03:30,510 --> 00:03:33,245
People are too intimidated
to hire a beautiful woman
89
00:03:33,313 --> 00:03:35,314
who won't work before noon or after 3:00.
90
00:03:35,381 --> 00:03:37,582
Or on any of my blackout dates.
91
00:03:37,650 --> 00:03:40,986
Those are the days after I
party too hard and black out.
92
00:03:43,656 --> 00:03:45,524
Have you even been looking for a job?
93
00:03:45,591 --> 00:03:47,859
Of course! I am always on the Internet
94
00:03:47,927 --> 00:03:49,967
looking for the right opportunity.
95
00:03:50,029 --> 00:03:51,496
( Lacey gasps ) Ooh! Here's one.
96
00:03:51,564 --> 00:03:55,400
"Millionaire bachelor spotted
at Malibu AA meeting."
97
00:03:55,468 --> 00:03:59,504
Ooh! It's Vance Brandon and he looks adorbs.
98
00:03:59,572 --> 00:04:02,674
So, instead of trying to
make something of yourself,
99
00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:05,711
you're just trying to trap some
rich fool into marrying you
100
00:04:05,778 --> 00:04:08,613
so you'll never have to work
another day in your life.
101
00:04:08,681 --> 00:04:11,683
Oh! I didn't realize you
were making a toast.
102
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,318
Yes, to that!
103
00:04:15,788 --> 00:04:18,557
(sighs) Give me a beer and a Tequila Back.
104
00:04:18,624 --> 00:04:20,359
And by "Tequila Back,"
I mean a bottle of tequila
105
00:04:20,426 --> 00:04:22,794
and stand back because I'm
about to get crazy drunk.
106
00:04:24,797 --> 00:04:26,898
Well, I've only got scotch.
107
00:04:26,966 --> 00:04:28,900
Rough day at the office, dear?
108
00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:30,602
I got fired.
109
00:04:30,670 --> 00:04:32,437
Today. Fired. My life is over.
110
00:04:32,505 --> 00:04:34,506
If I'm not a strip club manager...
111
00:04:34,574 --> 00:04:36,454
I don't know who I am.
112
00:04:36,476 --> 00:04:39,177
Dude, that sucks.
113
00:04:39,245 --> 00:04:40,846
You were born to do this.
114
00:04:40,913 --> 00:04:43,515
I bet while all the other kids
were trying to play tetherball,
115
00:04:43,583 --> 00:04:45,463
you were teaching the
girls how to work the pole.
116
00:04:48,654 --> 00:04:51,423
You'll never guess who
they made the new manager.
117
00:04:51,491 --> 00:04:53,258
One of the strippers.
118
00:04:53,326 --> 00:04:55,026
Oh, was it that super hot
girl that came out wearing
119
00:04:55,094 --> 00:04:57,494
the lab coat and the glasses?
'Cause she looked really smart.
120
00:04:58,731 --> 00:05:00,972
No, that's Tiffany. It was Kayla.
121
00:05:02,535 --> 00:05:05,203
Kayla? Did they mention why
122
00:05:05,271 --> 00:05:06,505
they wanted to make her the new manager?
123
00:05:06,572 --> 00:05:09,074
Yeah, apparently she went to the owner
124
00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:12,644
with some "Brilliant Ideas"
about how to improve the club.
125
00:05:12,712 --> 00:05:16,014
Did they mention what
any of those ideas were?
126
00:05:16,082 --> 00:05:19,317
No. They couldn't have been
any better than mine, right?
127
00:05:19,385 --> 00:05:21,987
No! No, no. Absolutely not.
128
00:05:22,054 --> 00:05:25,690
At best, they'd...
they'd be about exactly the same.
129
00:05:30,348 --> 00:05:31,482
( knocks on door )
130
00:05:31,549 --> 00:05:34,084
- ( TV mutes )
- Coming.
131
00:05:36,588 --> 00:05:38,756
- Hi!
- Hey.
132
00:05:38,823 --> 00:05:41,358
- Mm.
- Thanks for stopping by.
133
00:05:41,426 --> 00:05:45,095
Listen, I'm sorry about your
friend losing his job to me,
134
00:05:45,163 --> 00:05:47,865
but I've gotta tell you,
I've had an incredible day.
135
00:05:47,932 --> 00:05:50,434
You mean the kind where
you buy everybody drinks,
136
00:05:50,502 --> 00:05:53,782
then pay for it by swiping your
card through somebody's ass crack?
137
00:05:54,706 --> 00:05:56,842
Did you steal Sean's ideas?
138
00:05:56,868 --> 00:05:59,703
Well, I may have used one
or two as a launching pad.
139
00:05:59,771 --> 00:06:01,372
A launching pad to what?
140
00:06:01,439 --> 00:06:04,908
To the rest of his ideas.
141
00:06:04,976 --> 00:06:06,610
Kayla, this is not how
you want to get ahead.
142
00:06:06,678 --> 00:06:08,512
It's not dignified.
143
00:06:08,580 --> 00:06:09,780
I am 29 years old.
144
00:06:09,848 --> 00:06:11,582
How much longer do you
think I can be a dancer?
145
00:06:11,650 --> 00:06:14,084
Well, if you've ever been to
your club on a Tuesday night,
146
00:06:14,152 --> 00:06:16,220
I'd say 30 more years.
147
00:06:16,287 --> 00:06:18,489
Ahem, listen, I've got an hour
148
00:06:18,556 --> 00:06:20,224
before I have to go home
and get ready for work.
149
00:06:20,291 --> 00:06:22,126
We can spend it with
you bitching and moaning
150
00:06:22,193 --> 00:06:24,428
or just moaning.
151
00:06:25,046 --> 00:06:27,297
No, no. What you did was wrong.
152
00:06:27,365 --> 00:06:29,667
So, if you don't tell your boss,
I'm going to.
153
00:06:29,734 --> 00:06:32,269
You come anywhere near my club
154
00:06:32,337 --> 00:06:33,771
and I'll have the bouncers all over you.
155
00:06:33,838 --> 00:06:35,773
Oh, please.
I've known those bouncers for years
156
00:06:35,840 --> 00:06:37,041
and they're all my friends.
157
00:06:37,108 --> 00:06:40,310
Especially... Big Guy,
158
00:06:40,378 --> 00:06:43,747
Really Big Guy, and Freakishly Huge Guy.
159
00:06:43,815 --> 00:06:45,983
Oh, I got rid of them.
160
00:06:46,051 --> 00:06:48,285
Now it's Enormous Guy, More Enormous Guy,
161
00:06:48,353 --> 00:06:50,354
and Guy So Big He Ate the Guys You Knew.
162
00:06:52,791 --> 00:06:54,358
Come on, man,
163
00:06:54,426 --> 00:06:56,360
there's tons of other opportunities.
164
00:06:56,428 --> 00:06:58,062
Look at this. There's managing jobs
165
00:06:58,129 --> 00:07:00,249
available at a bunch of strip clubs.
166
00:07:00,665 --> 00:07:03,634
I mean they're kinda low-end.
167
00:07:03,702 --> 00:07:05,903
"Perfect Sixes,"
168
00:07:05,970 --> 00:07:08,672
"Strippers-For-Less,"
169
00:07:08,740 --> 00:07:10,774
"Plain But Nude."
170
00:07:12,477 --> 00:07:14,117
See, the guy that I worked for had a chain.
171
00:07:14,145 --> 00:07:15,846
He could afford to pay me decent money.
172
00:07:15,914 --> 00:07:17,481
Why are you even doing this for me?
173
00:07:17,549 --> 00:07:20,484
Because I'm your friend and I'll
do anything to help a friend.
174
00:07:20,552 --> 00:07:23,454
( laughs ) Would you?
175
00:07:23,521 --> 00:07:25,322
What are you implying, Sean?
176
00:07:25,390 --> 00:07:27,324
That every time I do something nice for you,
177
00:07:27,392 --> 00:07:28,792
I'm making up for something I've done wrong?
178
00:07:28,860 --> 00:07:30,127
Yes.
179
00:07:30,195 --> 00:07:32,476
Well, that's not the case this time.
180
00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:36,440
Every other time, maybe, but not this time.
181
00:07:37,912 --> 00:07:39,636
( sighs ) Before we start,
182
00:07:39,704 --> 00:07:42,064
does anybody know of a decent-paying job
183
00:07:42,073 --> 00:07:43,607
where you just kinda have to look cool
184
00:07:43,675 --> 00:07:45,976
and not be that smart?
185
00:07:46,044 --> 00:07:49,146
Good for you, Charlie,
you know your limitations.
186
00:07:49,214 --> 00:07:51,935
You're looking for a line
of work that suits ya.
187
00:07:52,851 --> 00:07:55,052
Actually, I'm asking for a friend of mine.
188
00:07:55,120 --> 00:07:56,921
Oh, is he an irresponsible jerk
189
00:07:56,955 --> 00:07:59,323
who makes dinner plans
and then doesn't show?
190
00:07:59,390 --> 00:08:00,924
No, he's very responsible...
191
00:08:00,992 --> 00:08:03,627
oh, no, dinner.
192
00:08:03,695 --> 00:08:05,529
Yeah. Dinner.
193
00:08:05,597 --> 00:08:09,366
I spent all day and night
preparing a beautiful meal.
194
00:08:09,434 --> 00:08:11,301
I am so sorry. How was it?
195
00:08:11,369 --> 00:08:13,103
It wasn't that good.
196
00:08:13,171 --> 00:08:15,472
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
197
00:08:15,540 --> 00:08:17,674
you're not the only ones
that I screwed over.
198
00:08:17,742 --> 00:08:19,510
( sighs ) I also got Sean fired.
199
00:08:19,577 --> 00:08:23,113
Why would another person's
suffering make me feel better?
200
00:08:23,181 --> 00:08:25,582
I don't know. I'm sorry.
201
00:08:25,650 --> 00:08:27,551
No, I'm asking because
I really do feel better
202
00:08:27,619 --> 00:08:30,654
and I wanna know why.
203
00:08:30,722 --> 00:08:33,390
Well, this woman that
I was dating at Sean's...
204
00:08:33,458 --> 00:08:34,558
place of employment.
205
00:08:34,626 --> 00:08:36,506
Stripper at a strip club. Go on...
206
00:08:37,829 --> 00:08:39,696
( sighs ) She stole Sean's ideas
207
00:08:39,764 --> 00:08:41,698
and then used them to take his job.
208
00:08:41,766 --> 00:08:43,367
I need to speak to the owner
209
00:08:43,434 --> 00:08:45,235
and let him know what happened,
210
00:08:45,236 --> 00:08:46,570
but she's the new manager
211
00:08:46,638 --> 00:08:48,638
and won't let me anywhere near the place.
212
00:08:48,640 --> 00:08:51,321
Stripper banned you from a strip club.
Go on.
213
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:54,645
Buddy of mine down in Texas,
214
00:08:54,712 --> 00:08:57,214
he ran a bar and they fired him.
215
00:08:57,282 --> 00:09:00,083
Brought in a replacement and
he started making changes...
216
00:09:00,151 --> 00:09:02,951
Redneck ran a honky-tonk
down in Hicksville. Go on.
217
00:09:03,688 --> 00:09:06,056
The customers complained so much
218
00:09:06,124 --> 00:09:10,460
that they rehired my buddy quicker than a...
219
00:09:10,528 --> 00:09:13,964
somethin' somethin'
on a hot somethin'-somethin'.
220
00:09:14,032 --> 00:09:15,792
I... I... ah, hell, I'm tired.
221
00:09:16,968 --> 00:09:19,203
Maybe we should do that for you.
222
00:09:19,270 --> 00:09:20,637
We could pretend to be rednecks.
223
00:09:20,705 --> 00:09:23,407
Oh, thanks, guys, but that would be an abuse
224
00:09:23,474 --> 00:09:26,777
of therapist-patient relationship.
225
00:09:26,845 --> 00:09:28,045
That being said,
226
00:09:28,112 --> 00:09:31,014
if three "Regular guys" walked into the club
227
00:09:31,082 --> 00:09:32,850
and started complaining
about how it was run,
228
00:09:32,917 --> 00:09:35,786
well, that... that I could not control.
229
00:09:35,854 --> 00:09:37,788
Yay! ( laughs )
230
00:09:37,856 --> 00:09:41,091
We're goin' to a strip club!
231
00:09:41,159 --> 00:09:43,639
You should come with us, Lacey.
232
00:09:43,661 --> 00:09:45,929
I can't go.
I'm pretending to be an alcoholic
233
00:09:45,997 --> 00:09:48,398
at some AA meeting to trap a millionaire.
234
00:09:48,466 --> 00:09:51,735
Lacey's acting like a drunk in
a room full of drunks. Go on.
235
00:09:51,803 --> 00:09:53,270
Patrick, stop it!
236
00:09:53,338 --> 00:09:55,606
I'm done.
237
00:09:59,143 --> 00:10:00,344
Um, excuse me.
238
00:10:00,411 --> 00:10:02,579
Is this the Alcoholics Anonymous meeting
239
00:10:02,647 --> 00:10:04,248
or the Sex Addicts Anonymous meeting?
240
00:10:04,315 --> 00:10:06,583
- Alcoholics Anonymous.
- Oh, good.
241
00:10:06,651 --> 00:10:08,652
Because if I'm going to give up something,
242
00:10:08,720 --> 00:10:12,256
it's gonna be the booze.
You know what I'm saying?
243
00:10:14,025 --> 00:10:15,692
Hi, I'm Lacey.
244
00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:19,062
Total alcoholic. Just found out today.
245
00:10:19,130 --> 00:10:22,099
I'm Vance. Nice to meet you.
246
00:10:22,166 --> 00:10:23,901
It was so shocking, really.
247
00:10:23,968 --> 00:10:26,288
I was sunbathing this morning, topless,
248
00:10:26,337 --> 00:10:28,739
when I spilled a Mai Tai all over my chest
249
00:10:28,806 --> 00:10:31,475
and it drizzled down my glistening stomach
250
00:10:31,542 --> 00:10:33,610
into my unlaced bikini bottoms
251
00:10:33,678 --> 00:10:35,512
and I thought, ( gasps )
252
00:10:35,580 --> 00:10:37,481
"I have a drinking problem."
253
00:10:37,548 --> 00:10:38,815
Wow.
254
00:10:38,883 --> 00:10:41,551
Maybe we should get a coffee sometime.
255
00:10:41,619 --> 00:10:42,886
- Let's talk after the meeting.
- Lacey: Okay.
256
00:10:42,954 --> 00:10:45,622
- Lacey?
- Jordan?
257
00:10:45,690 --> 00:10:47,991
Oh, my God. You're an alcoholic, too?
258
00:10:48,059 --> 00:10:50,694
I knew you were a wreck
from the moment I met you.
259
00:10:51,930 --> 00:10:53,730
Thanks!
260
00:10:53,798 --> 00:10:55,365
Oh! Let's sit together.
261
00:10:55,433 --> 00:10:57,768
We can be "Sobriety Sisters."
262
00:10:57,835 --> 00:11:00,470
Actually, I'm going to go sit next to Vance.
263
00:11:00,538 --> 00:11:01,972
He's a drunken millionaire
264
00:11:02,040 --> 00:11:04,841
and I don't want him to sit alone. Ever.
265
00:11:04,909 --> 00:11:06,743
Oh.
266
00:11:06,811 --> 00:11:08,512
I know what you're doing.
267
00:11:08,579 --> 00:11:10,147
We can both sit next to Vance.
268
00:11:10,214 --> 00:11:11,915
You can't date another person in the group
269
00:11:11,983 --> 00:11:13,350
until after you've had a year of sobriety.
270
00:11:13,418 --> 00:11:16,320
Oh, I'm probably only
going to need a day or two.
271
00:11:16,387 --> 00:11:18,288
I'm only a little bit of an alcoholic.
272
00:11:18,356 --> 00:11:20,590
Just mixed drinks and mimosas.
273
00:11:22,093 --> 00:11:23,894
So, you made all your money in oil.
274
00:11:23,962 --> 00:11:25,562
Yes, ma'am. I've got oil wells
275
00:11:25,630 --> 00:11:28,165
all the way from Houston up to Amarill-a.
276
00:11:28,232 --> 00:11:30,334
What about you?
Are you in the oil business, too?
277
00:11:30,401 --> 00:11:33,370
Fer sure. Interesting story...
278
00:11:33,438 --> 00:11:35,539
I was in my back yard shootin' at some food,
279
00:11:35,606 --> 00:11:37,741
and my bullet went into the ground
280
00:11:37,809 --> 00:11:40,077
and all this bubblin' crude came up.
281
00:11:40,144 --> 00:11:43,313
There's a couple more
verses of how I got rich,
282
00:11:43,381 --> 00:11:44,815
but I can't remember 'em right now.
283
00:11:44,882 --> 00:11:46,717
( chuckling )
284
00:11:46,784 --> 00:11:48,485
Hey, guys,
I just talked to one of the bouncers.
285
00:11:48,553 --> 00:11:50,320
The owner's not gonna be
here for another hour.
286
00:11:50,388 --> 00:11:52,756
Oh, well, I guess we're
going to have to sit here
287
00:11:52,824 --> 00:11:55,292
and entertain these beautiful young fillies
288
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:57,394
with the stories about how we amassed
289
00:11:57,462 --> 00:12:00,497
our vast fortunes in the oil game.
290
00:12:00,565 --> 00:12:02,466
If I stay here,
it's gonna cost you a hundred dollars.
291
00:12:02,533 --> 00:12:05,669
A hundred dollars?
Honey, I'm not in the market for a bride.
292
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,142
- What are you guys doing here?
- We're here to help you get your job back.
293
00:12:12,210 --> 00:12:15,130
Yeah, Charlie felt really
bad about what he did.
294
00:12:15,446 --> 00:12:17,547
We're trying to make it right.
295
00:12:17,615 --> 00:12:20,150
Oh, yeah.
296
00:12:20,218 --> 00:12:22,586
What he did was really bad.
297
00:12:22,653 --> 00:12:25,689
Just out of curiosity,
how did he describe it to you guys?
298
00:12:25,757 --> 00:12:28,425
Well, why don't you tell us what he did?
299
00:12:28,493 --> 00:12:30,761
And then we will tell you
300
00:12:30,828 --> 00:12:32,596
if that's what he told us
301
00:12:32,663 --> 00:12:34,331
what he did.
302
00:12:35,967 --> 00:12:37,667
Or you can just tell me
and then I'll confirm it.
303
00:12:37,735 --> 00:12:39,936
Okay. He told, uh, your idea
304
00:12:40,004 --> 00:12:41,571
to some stripper he was screwing,
305
00:12:41,639 --> 00:12:43,240
then she took your job.
306
00:12:44,609 --> 00:12:46,743
( chuckles )
307
00:12:46,811 --> 00:12:49,780
I cannot wait to kill that son of a bitch.
308
00:12:51,582 --> 00:12:53,250
What'd he tell you?!
309
00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:58,101
Hey, Vance!
310
00:12:58,137 --> 00:13:00,239
Oh, no. I'm totally excited about our date.
311
00:13:00,306 --> 00:13:02,808
Just a quick question...
I know you don't drink,
312
00:13:02,876 --> 00:13:04,756
but you still do hard drugs, right?
313
00:13:07,313 --> 00:13:09,248
Oh, good!
314
00:13:09,315 --> 00:13:10,816
No, me neither. ( chuckles )
315
00:13:10,884 --> 00:13:12,284
See you in a bit.
316
00:13:16,489 --> 00:13:18,824
- Jordan?!
- Hey, Sobriety Sister!
317
00:13:18,892 --> 00:13:21,527
Oh, hey, girl! So good to see you.
318
00:13:21,594 --> 00:13:22,961
You know what? I'll talk to you later.
319
00:13:23,029 --> 00:13:24,863
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
320
00:13:24,931 --> 00:13:26,431
I thought I'd come stay for a couple days
321
00:13:26,499 --> 00:13:28,967
and make sure you don't
get into any trouble.
322
00:13:29,035 --> 00:13:31,637
Where ya goin' all dressed up like that?
323
00:13:31,704 --> 00:13:34,406
I'm going to a special AA meeting downtown.
324
00:13:34,474 --> 00:13:36,308
It's for super cool people.
325
00:13:36,376 --> 00:13:38,877
I'd love to take you, but obviously...
326
00:13:40,313 --> 00:13:42,447
Hold on.
327
00:13:42,515 --> 00:13:44,182
You're going to see Vance, aren't you?
328
00:13:44,250 --> 00:13:46,051
I told you, alcoholics have to be sober
329
00:13:46,119 --> 00:13:47,653
for a year before they can date each other,
330
00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:49,081
you horny little drunk.
331
00:13:50,957 --> 00:13:53,692
Okay, look.
The truth is, I'm not an alcoholic.
332
00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:56,795
The only reason I joined AA
was to meet that millionaire.
333
00:13:56,863 --> 00:13:58,530
And the only reason I joined is because
334
00:13:58,598 --> 00:13:59,965
I woke up alone in a Pittsburgh hotel room
335
00:14:00,033 --> 00:14:01,433
with no clothes and the word "Slut"
336
00:14:01,501 --> 00:14:04,501
written on the bathroom
mirror in my own handwriting.
337
00:14:04,871 --> 00:14:08,006
Now, how many open bottles of booze
338
00:14:08,074 --> 00:14:10,671
do you have in this apartment?
339
00:14:10,697 --> 00:14:12,817
I'm not an alcoholic.
340
00:14:12,843 --> 00:14:15,013
You have got to stop saying that!
341
00:14:15,081 --> 00:14:16,315
If anybody believes that
the only reason you're there
342
00:14:16,382 --> 00:14:18,617
is to hook up with Vance,
they will kick you out.
343
00:14:18,685 --> 00:14:20,085
( gasps ) I can't get kicked out!
344
00:14:20,153 --> 00:14:21,853
Because...
345
00:14:21,921 --> 00:14:23,322
you're right!
346
00:14:23,389 --> 00:14:26,858
I'm a disgusting drunk
who needs help. ( sobs )
347
00:14:28,628 --> 00:14:30,662
That's better.
348
00:14:32,532 --> 00:14:34,299
Hey, Charlie.
349
00:14:34,327 --> 00:14:37,718
Hey! You guys are early.
Make it by the strip club last night?
350
00:14:37,744 --> 00:14:39,938
Uh, yes, and...
351
00:14:40,006 --> 00:14:41,673
one of us... I won't say which one...
352
00:14:41,741 --> 00:14:42,774
Nolan.
353
00:14:44,310 --> 00:14:46,111
Kind of spilled the beans
354
00:14:46,179 --> 00:14:47,779
when we ran into Sean
cleaning out his office.
355
00:14:47,847 --> 00:14:51,350
Okay, let's end the mystery right now.
356
00:14:51,417 --> 00:14:54,119
It was me.
357
00:14:54,187 --> 00:14:57,089
What? He's gonna kill me!
358
00:14:57,156 --> 00:14:59,358
Next time I tell you
guys not to do something,
359
00:14:59,425 --> 00:15:01,026
do it right.
360
00:15:01,094 --> 00:15:04,129
Sean's here. I bet he's mad!
361
00:15:04,197 --> 00:15:07,541
I mean, I know I would be
if I found out that way.
362
00:15:07,567 --> 00:15:08,900
Good luck!
363
00:15:13,044 --> 00:15:14,439
( softly ) Hey, Charlie.
364
00:15:14,465 --> 00:15:17,000
Hey, Sean.
365
00:15:17,877 --> 00:15:20,078
Look, about what happened...
366
00:15:21,481 --> 00:15:23,215
( stammering ) I just wanna apologize.
367
00:15:23,282 --> 00:15:25,484
Hey, you had no idea she'd do that.
368
00:15:27,253 --> 00:15:28,587
It's a compliment, really.
369
00:15:28,655 --> 00:15:30,055
You thought my ideas were so great,
370
00:15:30,123 --> 00:15:32,190
you were bragging about it. I get it.
371
00:15:32,258 --> 00:15:34,092
Are you sure?
372
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:35,827
Absolutely.
373
00:15:37,230 --> 00:15:40,165
I just mixed up a fresh pitcher of lemonade.
374
00:15:40,233 --> 00:15:43,435
Would you care for some?
375
00:15:46,305 --> 00:15:47,673
Lemonade, you say?
376
00:15:50,243 --> 00:15:52,283
That doesn't look like lemonade.
377
00:15:53,279 --> 00:15:54,813
Oh, it is.
378
00:15:57,817 --> 00:15:59,518
( stammers ) I... I'd love some,
379
00:15:59,585 --> 00:16:01,353
but my doctor says I've been drinking
380
00:16:01,421 --> 00:16:03,321
too much lemonade.
381
00:16:06,225 --> 00:16:08,185
Why don't you have some?
382
00:16:10,830 --> 00:16:12,731
I'd love to.
383
00:16:17,870 --> 00:16:20,472
Ah!
384
00:16:20,540 --> 00:16:23,842
That is very good lemonade.
385
00:16:25,111 --> 00:16:26,945
I better... I better get to group.
386
00:16:27,013 --> 00:16:29,247
Of course.
387
00:16:29,315 --> 00:16:30,916
Before you go...
388
00:16:32,385 --> 00:16:33,885
cigar?
389
00:16:39,358 --> 00:16:41,026
Let me guess,
390
00:16:41,094 --> 00:16:43,295
Acme brand?
391
00:16:43,362 --> 00:16:45,464
Don't be silly.
392
00:16:45,531 --> 00:16:47,899
Shall I light it for you?
393
00:16:57,844 --> 00:16:59,211
Maybe later.
394
00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:03,081
Of course. Later.
395
00:17:04,684 --> 00:17:07,185
Enjoy your group.
396
00:17:18,631 --> 00:17:20,465
Who are these people?
397
00:17:20,533 --> 00:17:22,734
Someone just dropped them off.
398
00:17:22,802 --> 00:17:24,669
They saw an ad at the free clinic
399
00:17:24,737 --> 00:17:27,773
for free anger therapy and free snacks.
400
00:17:27,840 --> 00:17:31,293
Apparently, poor people like free stuff.
401
00:17:32,945 --> 00:17:35,747
Sean. This is his payback.
402
00:17:35,815 --> 00:17:37,775
I'm sorry, guys.
I gotta get down to the club
403
00:17:37,817 --> 00:17:39,751
and find a way to talk to the owner.
404
00:17:39,819 --> 00:17:41,620
Patrick, would you please
make sure these people get
405
00:17:41,687 --> 00:17:43,655
something to eat,
then send them on their way?
406
00:17:43,723 --> 00:17:45,363
Same deal for the homeless guys.
407
00:17:49,538 --> 00:17:51,888
Hey. Where the hell you goin'?
408
00:17:51,914 --> 00:17:53,154
I really need to see the owner.
409
00:17:53,182 --> 00:17:56,751
- Not gonna happen.
- Okay. No problem.
410
00:17:56,819 --> 00:17:58,419
You guys are just doing your job.
411
00:17:58,487 --> 00:18:01,556
It's like hitting a wall here.
412
00:18:01,623 --> 00:18:03,324
You guys are big.
Who do you think would win in a fight?
413
00:18:03,392 --> 00:18:04,552
I would.
414
00:18:04,560 --> 00:18:06,828
Whoa, whoa. You believe this guy,
415
00:18:06,895 --> 00:18:08,496
challenging your masculinity like that?
416
00:18:08,564 --> 00:18:10,665
He's right. He hits the gym more than I do.
417
00:18:10,732 --> 00:18:12,733
You know, if you really
want to lose some weight,
418
00:18:12,801 --> 00:18:16,103
you get the best results
using the buddy system.
419
00:18:16,171 --> 00:18:17,738
Would you do a thing like that with me?
420
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:18,873
Of course I would!
421
00:18:18,941 --> 00:18:21,275
Working out by yourself is hard!
422
00:18:21,343 --> 00:18:22,877
You know, I say we start tomorrow...
423
00:18:22,945 --> 00:18:25,847
Hey, we said you're not
allowed to go back there.
424
00:18:25,914 --> 00:18:28,015
The trick is to keep a "Food Journal."
425
00:18:28,083 --> 00:18:29,951
- I heard that.
- Yeah.
426
00:18:30,018 --> 00:18:31,319
I really need to see the owner.
427
00:18:31,386 --> 00:18:34,622
I'm the owner. What's the problem?
428
00:18:34,690 --> 00:18:37,725
It's about your new manager, Kayla.
429
00:18:37,793 --> 00:18:39,894
Those weren't her ideas.
Those were Sean's and she stole them.
430
00:18:39,962 --> 00:18:41,729
Makes sense.
431
00:18:41,797 --> 00:18:43,865
She never had ideas like that before.
432
00:18:43,932 --> 00:18:47,034
Exactly! So you fired Sean because
you thought Kayla was brilliant.
433
00:18:47,102 --> 00:18:48,970
No, I fired Sean because I found out
434
00:18:49,037 --> 00:18:50,571
he was bangin' half the girls.
435
00:18:50,639 --> 00:18:53,074
Don't I feel foolish?
436
00:18:55,177 --> 00:18:56,811
I don't think I've ever
seen you this nervous.
437
00:18:56,879 --> 00:18:58,312
Who's this guy you're waitin' for?
438
00:18:58,380 --> 00:19:01,349
- A millionaire.
- That's what they all say.
439
00:19:01,416 --> 00:19:04,118
Then they get in their
18-wheelers and drive off.
440
00:19:05,621 --> 00:19:08,623
Put the drink down! You have a problem!
441
00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:09,924
Yeah, I have a problem.
442
00:19:09,992 --> 00:19:12,760
I'm getting smothered by
"Sober Companion Barbie."
443
00:19:12,828 --> 00:19:13,995
What's goin' on?!
444
00:19:14,062 --> 00:19:16,163
I'm trying to get her to stop drinking.
445
00:19:16,231 --> 00:19:18,332
Put the drink down, Jordan.
446
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,701
One day at a time. AA.
447
00:19:22,905 --> 00:19:24,739
She was the one that was drinking.
448
00:19:24,806 --> 00:19:26,774
The accusations, the anger,
449
00:19:26,842 --> 00:19:28,643
it's such textbook behavior.
450
00:19:28,644 --> 00:19:32,346
Don't worry. I'm going to be
there for you every second.
451
00:19:32,414 --> 00:19:34,655
So, do you want to go back to your place?
452
00:19:35,884 --> 00:19:37,785
Time! Time out!
453
00:19:37,853 --> 00:19:40,288
This doesn't lead to anything good.
454
00:19:40,355 --> 00:19:43,424
Thanks for sharin'.
455
00:19:43,492 --> 00:19:46,394
You know, maybe someday
you'll do what I've done.
456
00:19:46,461 --> 00:19:49,797
- What's that?
- I've given all my money to the program.
457
00:19:49,865 --> 00:19:52,433
You mean you've promised all your money
458
00:19:52,501 --> 00:19:54,001
to AA after you die.
459
00:19:54,069 --> 00:19:57,104
No, I gave it all away last month.
460
00:19:57,172 --> 00:19:59,453
That's why I live in a
studio apartment in Encino.
461
00:20:01,009 --> 00:20:02,677
You deceived me.
462
00:20:02,744 --> 00:20:06,180
I can't be in a relationship
with someone who lies to me...
463
00:20:06,248 --> 00:20:09,369
unless they have a lot of money. Goodbye.
464
00:20:17,092 --> 00:20:18,926
Hey.
465
00:20:18,994 --> 00:20:21,562
I just got back from the strip club.
466
00:20:21,630 --> 00:20:23,364
Turns out I didn't get you fired.
467
00:20:23,432 --> 00:20:24,952
What are you talking about?
468
00:20:24,967 --> 00:20:26,968
You got fired for bangin' the strippers.
469
00:20:27,035 --> 00:20:29,337
Huh.
470
00:20:29,404 --> 00:20:31,606
That makes sense.
471
00:20:34,977 --> 00:20:37,378
Yeah, I can see how someone could twist that
472
00:20:37,446 --> 00:20:40,047
into a fireable offense.
473
00:20:40,115 --> 00:20:42,917
So, you thought it was okay
to have sex with the girls?
474
00:20:42,985 --> 00:20:46,587
You don't fire the guy at Baskin-Robbins
for tasting the ice cream.
475
00:20:46,655 --> 00:20:49,023
Dude, you had your sample spoon
476
00:20:49,091 --> 00:20:50,157
in every flavor in the place.
477
00:20:50,225 --> 00:20:53,561
Chocolate, vanilla, half-Asian.
478
00:20:55,430 --> 00:20:56,764
Ah, Charlie. ( sighs )
479
00:20:56,832 --> 00:20:59,867
Why did God make strippers so hot?
480
00:20:59,935 --> 00:21:01,969
I don't know. I don't know.
481
00:21:02,037 --> 00:21:04,397
Greater minds than ours
have pondered that question.
482
00:21:15,334 --> 00:21:17,483
It's a big pony.
483
00:21:17,509 --> 00:21:21,207
sync and corrections by dreaMaker7
www.addic7ed.com