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So, tomorrow is Thanksgiving.
2
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Why don't we all talk about
what we're thankful for?
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Who wants to start?
4
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Okay, I'll start.
5
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I'm thankful that I found
a job that I love.
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Then, after baseball, I found this job,
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which is okay.
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Anybody else?
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I'm thankful I'm not
celebrating Thanksgiving
10
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- with my family this year.
- That bad, huh?
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Every year we'd start fighting
from the minute we started dinner
12
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until the food poisoning kicked in.
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The only good thing is is that
it would thin out the herd...
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one old relative at a time.
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Thanksgiving sucks for me, too.
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All the clubs are closed.
17
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So you'd rather be at a bar
18
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on Thanksgiving than with your family?
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Because I get it. I would, too.
20
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Nobody in my family
can stand each other.
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And also everyone's extra depressed
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because of, like,
how we Indians were treated.
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- Uh, Lacey?
- Yeah?
24
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When you were in grade school and
they talked about the Pilgrims...
25
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The what?
26
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How about you, Nolan?
How are your Thanksgivings?
27
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Well, we usually go
to Denny's for Thanksgiving.
28
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Well, that's just sad.
29
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Well, at least y'all have families.
30
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This will be the second Thanksgiving
31
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since I've separated from my wife.
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I don't know what the hell I
did to her to deserve this.
33
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Well, I think it's because when
you thought you won the lottery,
34
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you told her you were
leaving and she could...
35
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uh, where is it, where is it?
36
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Oh, here it is.
37
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"Rot in hell, you miserable old..."
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"bat."
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Well, I keep trying to apologize,
40
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but she won't even see me.
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You know what, guys?
42
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Instead of suffering through
another Thanksgiving
43
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with our screwed-up families,
44
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we all come here and have a
calm and peaceful one together.
45
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That's a great idea.
Oh, let's make it a potluck.
46
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We can each bring our favorite dish.
47
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Fine, but Nolan has to
promise to behave himself.
48
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Last time we celebrated a holiday
together, he tried to kiss me.
49
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But we were standing
under the mistletoe.
50
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It was Martin Lawrence King day!
51
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Okay, Lacey,
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you really need to start
watching the History Channel.
53
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Or BET.
54
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Or both.
55
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Anger Management 2x81
Charlie & The Terrible, Horrible,
No Good Very Bad Thanksgiving
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- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Happy Thanksgiving.
57
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I made maple-glazed sweet potatoes.
58
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My friend Sarah described
them as "yumazing."
59
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Well, they look great.
60
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Hey, guys. I brought yams.
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I made the yams. You were
supposed to bring the corn.
62
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Oh, I thought that was an expression.
63
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Like "raise the roof." "Bring the corn!"
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It is an expression, but it
actually means bring the corn.
65
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Well, don't worry, I brought
something completely different...
66
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sweet potatoes.
67
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Sweet potatoes and yams
are, like, the same thing.
68
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This Thanksgiving is a yam-tastrophe.
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( Doorbell rings )
70
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Oh, come on, everybody, relax.
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We're gonna have fun. "Bring the corn!"
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Coming!
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Hey, I didn't know what to
bring, so I made sweet potatoes.
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Oh, good, good. I was
scared we might run out.
75
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Is Sean here yet?
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No, but everybody else is except Ed.
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I got a big surprise for him.
Guess who I invited?
78
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Oh, I don't want to play this game,
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so I'm just gonna say Bill Murray.
80
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Bill Murray? No, Ed's wife.
81
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I went over there and I
talked to her for hours
82
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and I convinced her
that Ed's a changed man
83
00:04:01,828 --> 00:04:03,929
and she's agreed to give
him a second chance.
84
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( Scoffs )
Men don't change.
85
00:04:05,998 --> 00:04:08,733
Hey, hey, Ed has come a long way.
86
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Just yesterday he said that he would
vote for a woman as president...
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of the PTA, but it's a start.
88
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( Sighs )
Sean's cheating on me.
89
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Oh, God, not again.
90
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Jordan, I've told you a million times,
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Sean is not cheating on you.
92
00:04:21,747 --> 00:04:23,114
No, he's acting weird.
93
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He's usually really good
about returning texts,
94
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but now sometimes it takes him an hour.
95
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An hour?
96
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That son of a bitch, I can't
believe we trusted him.
97
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It gets worse.
98
00:04:35,995 --> 00:04:38,330
I decided to follow him,
and this morning
99
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I watched an attractive woman
let him into her house.
100
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That woman could've been anybody.
101
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Uh, his mother,
102
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a cousin, a jewelry designer...
103
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What is this?
104
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A list of cover stories on your phone?
105
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No.
106
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It's an app that provides alibis.
107
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Pretty cool for $6.99, huh?
108
00:05:00,887 --> 00:05:02,921
Look, I know you're upset, but please,
109
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please don't confront Sean tonight.
110
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I promised everyone this would
be a calm Thanksgiving.
111
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Fine, I'll just sit there
stewing in silence,
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hoping he chokes on a green bean.
113
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Well, that's a waste of time because
nobody brought green beans.
114
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Which is why I have to go to the store
115
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and pick up everything for a
Thanksgiving dinner that is not a yam.
116
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( Doorbell rings )
117
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Ah, that must be Ed.
118
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Can't wait to tell him
his wife's coming.
119
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Ed.
120
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Ellen, this is Charlie. Charlie, Ellen.
121
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- Hi.
- I just met her yesterday.
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She's my date.
123
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Your date?
124
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Fantastic.
125
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I brought yams.
126
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Perfect.
127
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I hope it's okay, but I wrote down
128
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a little blessing
to say before the meal.
129
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Great, great, 'cause I
think praying right now
130
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is a really good idea.
131
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So, is everybody here?
132
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Everybody except one person
133
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and I don't think
she'll be staying long.
134
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So, where did you guys meet and when?
135
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And why didn't you tell me?
136
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You're supposed to tell me these things.
137
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It's quite a story.
138
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We met at the post office.
139
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Wow, that story had it all...
140
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people, the post office.
141
00:06:28,719 --> 00:06:31,000
Jordan, why don't you show Ellen
142
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where we're putting
all the sweet potatoes?
143
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Well, happy holidays. Whoo.
144
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It's my medicine.
145
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It helps me keep my feelings inside.
146
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I'm sorry I didn't call
and tell you about Ellen,
147
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but I figured you wouldn't mind
148
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and I wanted some
company for the holiday.
149
00:06:52,676 --> 00:06:55,745
Ed, yesterday you sat
on this couch right there
150
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and told me how much
you missed your wife.
151
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Yeah, and then I went
to the post office.
152
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I told you that story.
153
00:07:03,554 --> 00:07:06,522
Ed, I invited your wife.
154
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Dorothy's coming here?
155
00:07:08,892 --> 00:07:11,094
Why would you do a fool thing like that?
156
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Because I thought
it would make you happy.
157
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Well, you should have said something
before I slept with Ellen.
158
00:07:16,567 --> 00:07:19,602
- You slept with her?
- Yes.
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00:07:19,670 --> 00:07:22,772
And she doesn't know I'm married.
160
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And last night, in the heat of passion,
161
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I might have said I loved her.
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Why the hell would you say that?
163
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Why does any man say that?
I wanted to get laid.
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Look, Ed, I've got to go to the store.
165
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And if you want to have
any chance with your wife,
166
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you've got to lose Ellen.
167
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How am I gonna do that?
It's Thanksgiving.
168
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( Sighs )
I don't know.
169
00:07:45,629 --> 00:07:47,910
There's families having
dinners up and down the block.
170
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She's gotta look like somebody's aunt.
171
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I just need 10 minutes at 350.
172
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That's too hot for my sweet potatoes.
I need 20 minutes at 320.
173
00:07:58,642 --> 00:08:00,109
Well, that'll burn my marshmallows.
174
00:08:00,177 --> 00:08:01,411
All right, everybody, stop.
175
00:08:01,478 --> 00:08:03,846
There are too many yams to be reheated.
176
00:08:03,914 --> 00:08:07,917
Somebody's yams are getting
voted off this island.
177
00:08:07,985 --> 00:08:10,219
I'm throwing away Ellen's yams.
178
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She's off talking to Ed.
Besides, she's a stranger,
179
00:08:13,390 --> 00:08:14,924
and I don't eat strangers' yams.
180
00:08:17,494 --> 00:08:20,396
Hey, guys. Happy Thanksgiving.
I brought cranberries.
181
00:08:20,464 --> 00:08:22,784
Oh, thank God. Something different.
182
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Oh, hey, look.
183
00:08:25,402 --> 00:08:28,971
We should be okay if we
eat this before 2006.
184
00:08:29,039 --> 00:08:30,873
That's just a scam.
They put that on there
185
00:08:30,941 --> 00:08:32,621
so you have to keep buying
new cranberries.
186
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Yeah, and when a can swells like this,
187
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that just means its contents
are bursting with flavor.
188
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Hey, baby. Happy Thanksgiving.
189
00:08:41,552 --> 00:08:43,920
Yeah, I'm so happy, I can't believe
190
00:08:43,987 --> 00:08:46,856
I'm not barfing rainbows all over you.
191
00:08:46,924 --> 00:08:49,292
- That's weird.
- It's like how happy you get
192
00:08:49,359 --> 00:08:52,094
when you eat four different
kinds of cereal for breakfast,
193
00:08:52,162 --> 00:08:55,202
but you're lactose intolerant,
so you throw it all up.
194
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See? Nolan gets me.
195
00:08:59,803 --> 00:09:02,104
- I do?
- Yeah.
196
00:09:02,172 --> 00:09:05,708
I never realized how insightful
and sensitive you are.
197
00:09:05,776 --> 00:09:08,444
You should sit next to me at dinner.
198
00:09:08,512 --> 00:09:11,547
( Laughs )
Wait, and I will sit...
199
00:09:11,615 --> 00:09:14,150
I've got two sides. You
can sit on the other one.
200
00:09:14,976 --> 00:09:17,296
What the hell is she doing?
201
00:09:17,321 --> 00:09:19,856
Flirting. Well, the tequila's flirting.
202
00:09:19,923 --> 00:09:23,092
She's just kind of along for the ride.
203
00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:25,995
But in front of Sean? She
doesn't even like Nolan.
204
00:09:26,063 --> 00:09:27,563
What do you care?
205
00:09:27,631 --> 00:09:29,499
Because getting Nolan worked up
206
00:09:29,566 --> 00:09:31,534
and doing nothing about
it is how I have fun.
207
00:09:31,602 --> 00:09:34,170
I mean, I barely eat.
Why else would I be here?
208
00:09:37,508 --> 00:09:40,476
Thank God you're back. We've gotta talk.
209
00:09:40,544 --> 00:09:43,579
- Did you get rid of Ellen?
- Shh, shh, shh. She's in the john.
210
00:09:43,647 --> 00:09:45,848
Ed, your wife's
gonna be here any minute.
211
00:09:45,916 --> 00:09:48,150
Well, I tried to get rid of her,
212
00:09:48,218 --> 00:09:50,219
- but she wouldn't take the hint.
- What did you tell her?
213
00:09:50,287 --> 00:09:53,122
Well, I figured if I said
something really offensive,
214
00:09:53,190 --> 00:09:56,626
she'd run out of here
like a Mexican at a job fair.
215
00:09:56,693 --> 00:10:00,129
But I couldn't think of anything.
216
00:10:00,197 --> 00:10:02,231
Well, then, let me try.
217
00:10:02,299 --> 00:10:04,400
Oh, hey, Charlie. You're back.
218
00:10:04,468 --> 00:10:07,303
Hey, look, Ellen. This is awkward,
219
00:10:07,371 --> 00:10:10,940
and under normal circumstances,
I'd love to have you,
220
00:10:11,008 --> 00:10:13,376
but I've done a head count
221
00:10:13,443 --> 00:10:15,244
and it turns out if you stay...
222
00:10:16,780 --> 00:10:19,982
there aren't gonna be enough yams.
223
00:10:20,050 --> 00:10:22,418
Oh, gee, Charlie,
224
00:10:22,486 --> 00:10:23,953
can't we make this work some...
225
00:10:24,021 --> 00:10:26,689
No, no, no, I totally understand.
226
00:10:26,757 --> 00:10:30,026
You do? Well, that's great. Thank you.
227
00:10:30,093 --> 00:10:32,895
I don't have to eat anything.
228
00:10:32,963 --> 00:10:35,498
I'm just happy being with good people
229
00:10:35,566 --> 00:10:37,266
who care about each other.
230
00:10:39,136 --> 00:10:42,238
Oh, Ellen, that lovely sentiment
231
00:10:42,306 --> 00:10:44,507
is gonna make this next part
so much harder.
232
00:10:46,476 --> 00:10:49,045
Ed's wife is coming. I invited her,
233
00:10:49,112 --> 00:10:51,981
and when she gets here,
you can't be here.
234
00:10:53,517 --> 00:10:56,352
You have a wife?
235
00:10:56,420 --> 00:10:59,288
Trust me, I'm as surprised as you are.
236
00:10:59,356 --> 00:11:02,458
When did this happen?
237
00:11:02,526 --> 00:11:04,160
Well, they're separated,
238
00:11:04,227 --> 00:11:06,267
but they had some wonderful
years together
239
00:11:06,330 --> 00:11:08,230
and now she's willing
to give it another chance.
240
00:11:08,298 --> 00:11:11,033
So I'm just being thrown out
241
00:11:11,101 --> 00:11:13,369
like yesterday's trash?
242
00:11:13,437 --> 00:11:15,271
Thank you for understanding.
243
00:11:17,023 --> 00:11:19,184
I will not be treated this way,
244
00:11:19,209 --> 00:11:21,277
and I'm not going anywhere.
245
00:11:21,345 --> 00:11:23,813
- Ellen, don't...
- And when your wife shows up,
246
00:11:23,880 --> 00:11:25,915
I'm gonna tell her everything.
247
00:11:25,983 --> 00:11:28,417
Look, Ellen,
248
00:11:28,485 --> 00:11:31,687
I meant everything I said last night!
249
00:11:31,755 --> 00:11:34,390
I just changed my mind today.
250
00:11:34,458 --> 00:11:37,593
Ellen: Go to hell, you bastard!
251
00:11:37,661 --> 00:11:39,621
My husband cheated on me for years.
252
00:11:39,630 --> 00:11:41,564
Your wife needs to know the truth.
253
00:11:41,632 --> 00:11:43,466
I've been in her shoes...
254
00:11:43,533 --> 00:11:46,335
and I think her bathrobe!
255
00:11:46,403 --> 00:11:48,804
( Doorbell rings )
256
00:11:50,731 --> 00:11:53,452
It's your wife. You want
to make a run for it?
257
00:11:53,477 --> 00:11:56,412
Too late. She's got on
her orthopedic shoes.
258
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:59,682
She moves like a cheetah
in those things.
259
00:12:03,053 --> 00:12:05,888
- Happy Thanksgiving.
- Well, thank you.
260
00:12:05,956 --> 00:12:07,690
I hear you've got an old coot
261
00:12:07,758 --> 00:12:10,826
whose bony ass fits
the divot in my couch.
262
00:12:10,894 --> 00:12:13,029
Well, since my ass is full and lush,
263
00:12:13,096 --> 00:12:14,530
I'm assuming you mean Ed.
264
00:12:16,867 --> 00:12:18,334
Happy Thanksgiving, darlin'.
265
00:12:18,402 --> 00:12:20,936
Let's go home.
266
00:12:21,004 --> 00:12:22,938
- Ellen: Is that her?
- No.
267
00:12:23,006 --> 00:12:25,374
Who's that?
268
00:12:25,442 --> 00:12:28,411
Uh, that was, um, my chiropractor.
269
00:12:28,478 --> 00:12:31,414
She's here to see my sports announcer.
270
00:12:31,481 --> 00:12:33,949
I mean, cousin. Don't worry about it.
Just go.
271
00:12:34,017 --> 00:12:36,686
I'm not going anywhere.
272
00:12:36,753 --> 00:12:39,221
Besides, I gotta use
the little girls' room.
273
00:12:39,289 --> 00:12:41,857
I've had a long drive, and Ed knows
274
00:12:41,925 --> 00:12:44,193
I've got a bladder like a lima bean.
275
00:12:44,261 --> 00:12:46,629
( Laughs )
Okay, okay, then use the bathroom upstairs.
276
00:12:46,697 --> 00:12:48,731
The one down here has one
of those Japanese toilets
277
00:12:48,799 --> 00:12:50,533
that does everything for you.
278
00:12:50,600 --> 00:12:52,101
If you don't know how to use
it, you could really get hurt.
279
00:12:52,169 --> 00:12:53,536
Ooh.
280
00:12:56,773 --> 00:12:59,575
Ellen, honey, please come out.
281
00:13:03,380 --> 00:13:05,614
You know, I've been in there
282
00:13:05,682 --> 00:13:07,917
listening to you talk to your wife
283
00:13:07,984 --> 00:13:10,464
and I've been wondering whether
I want to be the kind of person
284
00:13:10,487 --> 00:13:12,655
that ruins your holiday.
285
00:13:12,723 --> 00:13:15,624
- Well, that's very healthy.
- Thank you.
286
00:13:15,692 --> 00:13:17,626
Turns out I am that kind of person,
287
00:13:17,694 --> 00:13:19,228
you two-timing jackass.
288
00:13:21,098 --> 00:13:22,832
We got a runner.
289
00:13:32,020 --> 00:13:34,202
Oh, if you need it, it's free.
290
00:13:34,270 --> 00:13:35,704
I'm Dorothy, Ed's wife.
291
00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:38,607
I know. I'm Ellen, Ed's girlfriend.
292
00:13:38,674 --> 00:13:39,795
( Footsteps approaching )
293
00:13:41,010 --> 00:13:43,512
You have a girlfriend?
294
00:13:43,579 --> 00:13:46,114
( Chuckles )
Not anymore, he doesn't.
295
00:13:46,182 --> 00:13:48,550
But he did last night.
296
00:13:48,618 --> 00:13:51,953
Okay, look, Dorothy, Ellen.
297
00:13:52,021 --> 00:13:54,789
I know you're both very angry,
which is my area of expertise.
298
00:13:54,857 --> 00:13:57,926
Now, everybody take a deep breath.
299
00:13:57,994 --> 00:14:00,262
I only have one lung.
300
00:14:02,732 --> 00:14:05,767
Then take a series of shallow breaths.
301
00:14:05,835 --> 00:14:08,303
You should know
302
00:14:08,371 --> 00:14:11,206
your husband told me he was single
303
00:14:11,274 --> 00:14:13,842
and we had sex last night.
304
00:14:15,878 --> 00:14:18,079
Good-bye, Ed.
305
00:14:18,147 --> 00:14:20,282
Don't call or fax me.
306
00:14:22,850 --> 00:14:25,730
That's all I needed to hear. I'm leaving.
307
00:14:25,755 --> 00:14:26,988
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
308
00:14:27,056 --> 00:14:30,158
Dorothy, don't throw away 50 good years.
309
00:14:30,226 --> 00:14:32,260
This is all my fault.
310
00:14:32,328 --> 00:14:33,662
Ed thought you were gone forever
311
00:14:33,729 --> 00:14:35,730
and he reached out to someone else.
312
00:14:35,798 --> 00:14:37,766
He didn't know that I invited you.
313
00:14:37,833 --> 00:14:40,035
It's true, Dottie.
She means nothing to me
314
00:14:40,102 --> 00:14:43,171
and I'll send her a fax
saying so right now.
315
00:14:43,239 --> 00:14:45,674
Too little, too late.
316
00:14:45,741 --> 00:14:48,210
- Please let me explain.
- No.
317
00:14:48,277 --> 00:14:49,544
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Okay, all right.
318
00:14:49,612 --> 00:14:51,546
Just give me one second
319
00:14:51,614 --> 00:14:54,416
and I'll show you something
that'll clear all this up.
320
00:15:00,406 --> 00:15:02,166
Charlie, what the hell are you doing?
321
00:15:02,191 --> 00:15:04,292
I'm locking you both in there!
322
00:15:04,360 --> 00:15:06,428
You've spent the last
two years not communicating
323
00:15:06,495 --> 00:15:07,762
with each other and it's
time to sort it out.
324
00:15:07,830 --> 00:15:09,898
I am a guest in your home!
325
00:15:09,966 --> 00:15:11,966
And that's why I'll stop by periodically
326
00:15:11,968 --> 00:15:14,269
and check on you and slide
yams under the door.
327
00:15:14,337 --> 00:15:16,938
Oh.
328
00:15:17,006 --> 00:15:19,274
All right, everyone,
I have taken the liberty
329
00:15:19,342 --> 00:15:21,343
of making seat assignments.
330
00:15:21,410 --> 00:15:23,078
I put a lot of thought into this,
331
00:15:23,145 --> 00:15:25,347
so I don't want anyone
questioning my decisions.
332
00:15:25,414 --> 00:15:27,449
Why do you get to sit
at the head of the table?
333
00:15:27,516 --> 00:15:29,551
Lacey, that's a question,
which is why you will now
334
00:15:29,619 --> 00:15:32,687
be seated with your back to the room.
335
00:15:32,755 --> 00:15:34,456
Oh, good.
336
00:15:34,523 --> 00:15:36,791
You put Nolan next to me.
337
00:15:36,859 --> 00:15:39,761
It's just so nice to sit next to a man
338
00:15:39,829 --> 00:15:42,130
who's cute and decent.
339
00:15:42,198 --> 00:15:44,499
I'm sorry, what's that supposed to mean?
340
00:15:44,567 --> 00:15:47,569
Yeah, and if you call Nolan
cute or a man one more time,
341
00:15:47,637 --> 00:15:50,005
you're gonna be picking corn
bread out of your extensions.
342
00:15:50,072 --> 00:15:52,240
Don't worry, Nolan.
343
00:15:52,308 --> 00:15:55,076
Everything else on me
is completely real.
344
00:15:55,144 --> 00:15:56,778
Okay, all right, you know what?
345
00:15:56,846 --> 00:15:59,314
- You and I need to talk.
- I'm not going anywhere.
346
00:15:59,382 --> 00:16:02,984
Okay, guys, I just locked a
couple of old people upstairs,
347
00:16:03,052 --> 00:16:05,020
so you might hear
some yelling and crashing
348
00:16:05,087 --> 00:16:08,223
and hillbilly slang we don't understand,
349
00:16:08,291 --> 00:16:11,760
but outside of that, we're gonna
have a great Thanksgiving.
350
00:16:11,827 --> 00:16:14,362
I don't think that's an option anymore
because Jordan has gone crazy.
351
00:16:14,430 --> 00:16:16,064
- I've gone crazy?
- Yeah.
352
00:16:16,132 --> 00:16:17,732
I caught you cheating this morning.
353
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:19,467
Don't deny it. I followed you.
354
00:16:19,535 --> 00:16:21,136
And the only reason
I didn't say anything
355
00:16:21,203 --> 00:16:23,004
is because Charlie told me
not to bring it up.
356
00:16:23,989 --> 00:16:26,150
Wait a second, you knew that
she thought I was cheating
357
00:16:26,175 --> 00:16:27,242
and you didn't say anything to me?
358
00:16:27,310 --> 00:16:29,878
Oh, hey.
359
00:16:29,945 --> 00:16:32,947
Who made these place cards?
360
00:16:33,015 --> 00:16:35,283
I just love them.
361
00:16:35,351 --> 00:16:38,286
And by the way, I'm sitting
at the head of the table.
362
00:16:38,354 --> 00:16:41,354
So if you're not cheating, then who's
the whore I saw you with this morning?
363
00:16:41,390 --> 00:16:43,792
- She's a therapist.
- I'm a therapist.
364
00:16:43,859 --> 00:16:45,393
How many do you need to sleep with?
365
00:16:45,461 --> 00:16:47,421
What do you have, some kind of fetish?
366
00:16:47,463 --> 00:16:50,732
I am not sleeping with her.
She's my therapist.
367
00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:53,435
Okay? I'm trying to work
through my fear of commitment
368
00:16:53,502 --> 00:16:56,703
because I think I want to spend
the rest of my life with you.
369
00:16:58,941 --> 00:17:00,875
( Halfhearted )
Yay.
370
00:17:02,311 --> 00:17:04,145
You want to marry me?
371
00:17:04,213 --> 00:17:06,681
Yes.
372
00:17:06,749 --> 00:17:08,450
I don't see a ring.
373
00:17:10,653 --> 00:17:12,721
Shut up.
374
00:17:14,156 --> 00:17:16,524
No. I've got to go.
375
00:17:23,766 --> 00:17:27,166
Well, the good news is we're
not with our families.
376
00:17:34,171 --> 00:17:35,938
( Exhaling )
377
00:17:36,006 --> 00:17:37,573
Hey, what are you doing?
378
00:17:37,641 --> 00:17:39,275
I want to go home.
I'm using my Breathalyzer
379
00:17:39,342 --> 00:17:41,644
to see if I'm too drunk to drive.
380
00:17:41,711 --> 00:17:43,546
You don't need a Breathalyzer.
You could just ask,
381
00:17:43,613 --> 00:17:45,681
for example, anyone
who's seen you today.
382
00:17:45,749 --> 00:17:47,283
Can I look at that?
383
00:17:50,987 --> 00:17:54,423
( Exhales )
384
00:17:54,491 --> 00:17:57,726
Huh, .04 and I haven't had
a drink since Sunday.
385
00:17:59,225 --> 00:18:01,506
Will you drive me home?
I don't want to talk to Sean.
386
00:18:01,531 --> 00:18:04,212
It's okay. I asked him
not to come out here.
387
00:18:06,736 --> 00:18:10,539
Wow, for a little woman,
you eat a lot of junk.
388
00:18:14,811 --> 00:18:17,713
I... I feel terrible.
389
00:18:17,781 --> 00:18:19,221
I don't know why this is happening.
390
00:18:19,249 --> 00:18:20,983
Sean and I are so good together.
391
00:18:21,051 --> 00:18:23,686
Well, sure, you are. You're
following him all over town
392
00:18:23,753 --> 00:18:24,987
trying to catch him cheating.
393
00:18:25,055 --> 00:18:28,057
It's like a fairy tale.
394
00:18:28,124 --> 00:18:29,792
Look, Sean is not cheating on you.
395
00:18:29,860 --> 00:18:31,293
I know.
396
00:18:31,361 --> 00:18:33,496
I just can't trust him.
397
00:18:33,563 --> 00:18:36,098
I can't seem to trust any guy.
398
00:18:36,166 --> 00:18:39,268
Maybe this has something to
do with your first marriage.
399
00:18:39,336 --> 00:18:42,577
Why, because my ex-husband
cheated on me with my sister?
400
00:18:42,639 --> 00:18:44,173
I dealt with that a long time ago...
401
00:18:44,241 --> 00:18:47,810
( Crying )
and I am so over it.
402
00:18:49,446 --> 00:18:53,148
Well, that much is clear.
403
00:18:53,216 --> 00:18:56,218
Maybe since this is your first
serious relationship since that,
404
00:18:56,286 --> 00:18:58,921
you've got a little more work to do.
405
00:18:58,989 --> 00:19:01,457
Do you think so?
406
00:19:01,525 --> 00:19:04,627
Okay, this may be whatever
I drank on Sunday talking,
407
00:19:04,694 --> 00:19:06,695
but, yes.
408
00:19:07,874 --> 00:19:10,075
I don't think I can be with Sean anymore
409
00:19:10,100 --> 00:19:11,734
until I figure this out.
410
00:19:11,801 --> 00:19:15,170
Well, that's... that's very mature.
411
00:19:18,308 --> 00:19:22,311
Are you listening to audiobooks
of "Twilight" on CD?
412
00:19:22,379 --> 00:19:25,540
Don't judge me. Somebody
wants to marry this.
413
00:19:27,584 --> 00:19:30,384
- Don't you ever do that again.
- What'd I do?
414
00:19:30,387 --> 00:19:33,289
Jordan was flirting with
you, that's what you did.
415
00:19:33,356 --> 00:19:35,858
I'm sorry.
416
00:19:35,926 --> 00:19:38,627
No, wait a minute. No, I'm not.
417
00:19:38,695 --> 00:19:40,729
Anyone can flirt with me,
418
00:19:40,797 --> 00:19:43,065
even if they're drunk
and have hair extensions.
419
00:19:45,035 --> 00:19:46,402
I don't belong to you.
420
00:19:46,469 --> 00:19:49,672
Oh, really?
421
00:19:53,243 --> 00:19:55,978
Thanksgiving can kiss
my full and lush ass.
422
00:20:11,094 --> 00:20:14,330
Nolan, you realize
Lacey's just overreacting
423
00:20:14,397 --> 00:20:15,965
because she felt threatened by Jordan.
424
00:20:16,032 --> 00:20:17,900
I don't care.
425
00:20:20,453 --> 00:20:22,614
Okay, well, I'm your therapist.
426
00:20:22,639 --> 00:20:25,207
It's my job to make you aware.
427
00:20:25,275 --> 00:20:26,542
Thanks.
428
00:20:29,879 --> 00:20:31,981
Hey, Patrick, you seen Sean?
429
00:20:32,048 --> 00:20:33,549
Oh, he went home.
430
00:20:33,617 --> 00:20:35,250
Well, I guess this Thanksgiving
431
00:20:35,318 --> 00:20:36,885
didn't turn out the way we all wanted.
432
00:20:36,953 --> 00:20:39,021
Yeah, look at me
433
00:20:39,089 --> 00:20:41,223
eating poorly seasoned turkey alone
434
00:20:41,291 --> 00:20:43,092
at a pool table at my therapist's house
435
00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:45,127
while drinking warm Two Buck Chuck.
436
00:20:45,195 --> 00:20:47,630
Yeah, sorry, man.
437
00:20:47,697 --> 00:20:50,099
Actually, as far as Thanksgivings go,
438
00:20:50,166 --> 00:20:52,468
this one's in my top three.
439
00:20:57,273 --> 00:20:59,274
( Knocks )
Ed?
440
00:20:59,342 --> 00:21:01,176
Everybody's gone.
441
00:21:01,244 --> 00:21:02,745
It's been a couple hours.
442
00:21:02,812 --> 00:21:04,613
How you guys doing in there?
443
00:21:04,681 --> 00:21:06,115
Ed?
444
00:21:11,221 --> 00:21:12,955
Hey, Charlie.
445
00:21:13,023 --> 00:21:14,923
Thanks for locking us in your bedroom.
446
00:21:14,991 --> 00:21:18,627
We worked everything out... twice.
447
00:21:18,695 --> 00:21:20,529
Well, congratulations.
448
00:21:20,597 --> 00:21:23,517
Way to "bring the corn."
449
00:21:23,611 --> 00:21:28,611
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