1
00:00:04,702 --> 00:00:06,151
Hello, everyone.
2
00:00:06,236 --> 00:00:07,569
Frederick!
3
00:00:07,655 --> 00:00:10,155
Beatrice.
4
00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:14,459
May I present Miss Celery Savoy
and her bow-wow, Dumpling.
5
00:00:16,497 --> 00:00:18,497
And may I make
the further announcement
6
00:00:18,632 --> 00:00:22,217
that we are engaged...
7
00:00:22,336 --> 00:00:23,919
in...
8
00:00:24,004 --> 00:00:25,837
a soon-to-be-married
agreement.
9
00:00:33,597 --> 00:00:35,097
Celery fucking Savoy
10
00:00:35,182 --> 00:00:36,732
is the President
of the Clambake Club.
11
00:00:36,850 --> 00:00:39,651
It is unbelievable that a sack
of stupid like Frederick
12
00:00:39,737 --> 00:00:43,188
was able to pull
in a human diamond like Celery.
13
00:00:43,273 --> 00:00:45,574
It's like catching
a golden lobster
14
00:00:45,693 --> 00:00:47,109
with a trap made of shit.
15
00:00:47,194 --> 00:00:49,945
Welcome
to the family, Celery!
16
00:00:50,030 --> 00:00:51,697
Congratulations, Frederick.
17
00:00:51,782 --> 00:00:55,033
You've become another cog
in the great marriage industry.
18
00:00:55,119 --> 00:00:57,336
Well, that is very generous
of you to say,
19
00:00:57,421 --> 00:01:02,007
especially since you will never
know the joy of human touch.
20
00:01:02,092 --> 00:01:03,342
Pardon me, Frederick.
21
00:01:03,427 --> 00:01:05,177
I'm afraid
I may not have heard you.
22
00:01:05,262 --> 00:01:07,713
Would you mind re-describing
the nature of your relationship
23
00:01:07,798 --> 00:01:08,964
with Celery?
24
00:01:09,049 --> 00:01:10,549
Well,
it's like my Freddy said.
25
00:01:10,684 --> 00:01:12,551
We're to be married.
26
00:01:12,636 --> 00:01:14,686
Oh, yes.
That's what I thought he said.
27
00:01:14,772 --> 00:01:17,305
I was just a little distracted
by this buzzing in my head
28
00:01:17,391 --> 00:01:20,726
and hot numbness covering
my body and time slowing down.
29
00:01:20,811 --> 00:01:21,810
Frederick!
30
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Uh, uh, I...
31
00:01:24,281 --> 00:01:28,066
I have the most tremendous urge
to make water.
32
00:01:28,152 --> 00:01:29,484
- Oh.
- I-I can't--
33
00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:34,956
That's not
a toilet, Mother!
34
00:01:35,075 --> 00:01:36,875
That's my new best friend!
35
00:01:36,960 --> 00:01:41,413
I'm sure I'm pleased
to make your acquaintance.
36
00:01:41,498 --> 00:01:43,915
♪ I want the money,
I want the fame ♪
37
00:01:44,051 --> 00:01:46,251
♪ I want the whole world
to know my name ♪
38
00:01:46,387 --> 00:01:48,503
♪ This is mine,
I got to get it ♪
39
00:01:48,589 --> 00:01:51,089
♪ I got to get it,
got, got to get it ♪
40
00:01:51,225 --> 00:01:53,087
♪ Another Period ♪
41
00:01:53,088 --> 00:01:55,088
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
42
00:01:56,764 --> 00:01:58,013
Mother didn't just urinate
43
00:01:58,098 --> 00:02:00,098
on our newest and most
important family member.
44
00:02:00,234 --> 00:02:02,434
Peepers,
fetch the urine talcum.
45
00:02:02,519 --> 00:02:05,604
She also urinated on
this family's social standing.
46
00:02:05,739 --> 00:02:07,522
I need to do something
that will force Celery
47
00:02:07,608 --> 00:02:09,658
to take our family
seriously again--
48
00:02:09,777 --> 00:02:12,994
host a 17-course meal
in honor of her dog, Dumpling.
49
00:02:15,282 --> 00:02:17,666
Lady of the house present!
50
00:02:17,785 --> 00:02:19,084
Lady of the house present!
51
00:02:19,169 --> 00:02:20,419
If any of you feel a cough
coming on
52
00:02:20,504 --> 00:02:21,953
or any sort
of facial dampness
53
00:02:22,039 --> 00:02:24,172
please refrain
from breathing.
54
00:02:24,291 --> 00:02:27,292
The puppies
for your perusal, Madam.
55
00:02:27,428 --> 00:02:29,961
Aw, they're all so cute!
56
00:02:30,047 --> 00:02:32,297
Uh, I'll take that one.
57
00:02:32,382 --> 00:02:34,516
Oh, no, no,
um, that one.
58
00:02:34,635 --> 00:02:36,218
Oh, I can't decide!
59
00:02:36,303 --> 00:02:37,803
I'll take them all.
60
00:02:37,888 --> 00:02:40,305
You'll be perfect
for my cape!
61
00:02:44,144 --> 00:02:46,445
Stop trying to escape.
62
00:02:50,317 --> 00:02:53,485
Was that as bad
as I believe it was?
63
00:02:53,570 --> 00:02:57,656
No. Everyone mistakes an heiress
for a water closet
64
00:02:57,741 --> 00:03:00,408
from time to time,
don't they?
65
00:03:00,494 --> 00:03:02,327
I'm sure Celery
counts herself lucky
66
00:03:02,463 --> 00:03:05,130
to be peed on
by the great Dodo Bellacourt.
67
00:03:05,215 --> 00:03:09,468
Oh, heavens,
why must my body fail me so?
68
00:03:09,553 --> 00:03:11,386
In some Asiatic cultures,
relieving oneself
69
00:03:11,505 --> 00:03:15,257
on the guest is considered
a sign of respect.
70
00:03:15,342 --> 00:03:17,092
Would the Madam
like a syringe of the dog?
71
00:03:17,177 --> 00:03:21,346
No. This drug use
simply will not do!
72
00:03:21,431 --> 00:03:25,100
- No more!
- A little won't hurt.
73
00:03:25,185 --> 00:03:27,352
She said, "No more!"
74
00:03:29,740 --> 00:03:32,858
The lady said,
"No more."
75
00:03:32,993 --> 00:03:36,745
You know I had no choice in the
matter of my upcoming marriage.
76
00:03:36,864 --> 00:03:39,748
I'm a senator now,
so I must get engaged.
77
00:03:39,867 --> 00:03:41,533
But I thought that meant
you were going to change the law
78
00:03:41,618 --> 00:03:43,535
so we could marry?
79
00:03:43,620 --> 00:03:47,339
My sweet, shivering tower
of aspic.
80
00:03:47,424 --> 00:03:49,090
Senators
don't make the laws.
81
00:03:49,209 --> 00:03:51,593
They just accept bribes
from corporations.
82
00:03:51,712 --> 00:03:53,879
And until there's a corporation
that cares about siblings
83
00:03:54,014 --> 00:03:56,214
being allowed to marry,
there's nothing we can do.
84
00:03:56,350 --> 00:03:58,266
I hate corporations!
85
00:03:58,385 --> 00:04:01,353
And I hate Celery.
86
00:04:01,438 --> 00:04:03,772
If it makes you feel
any better, I hate her too.
87
00:04:03,891 --> 00:04:06,975
She's smart, well traveled.
She laughs at all my jokes.
88
00:04:07,060 --> 00:04:08,393
It's awkward.
89
00:04:10,113 --> 00:04:11,313
Well, it's fine.
90
00:04:11,398 --> 00:04:12,480
We're just gonna
have to be more careful
91
00:04:12,566 --> 00:04:14,232
when we sneak out
for our lovemaking.
92
00:04:14,368 --> 00:04:18,236
Oh, my sweet, shivering tower
of aspic,
93
00:04:18,372 --> 00:04:20,739
Father said that now
that I'm a senator,
94
00:04:20,874 --> 00:04:22,824
we must stop
our fornicating.
95
00:04:22,910 --> 00:04:24,576
What?
96
00:04:24,711 --> 00:04:26,044
But I love you!
97
00:04:26,129 --> 00:04:28,330
Beatrice.
98
00:04:28,415 --> 00:04:29,748
Beatrice, please--
99
00:04:29,833 --> 00:04:32,751
Please don't do this, Frederick.
I love you.
100
00:04:34,588 --> 00:04:36,087
- Please, please don't do this.
- Baby. Bea.
101
00:04:36,173 --> 00:04:37,756
Please, Frederick,
don't do this.
102
00:04:37,891 --> 00:04:40,642
You're acting like a baby...
103
00:04:40,761 --> 00:04:43,762
like the baby
I first made love to.
104
00:04:46,099 --> 00:04:48,099
But we-- we can't.
105
00:04:48,235 --> 00:04:50,902
We had to grow up sometime.
We can't stay babies forever.
106
00:04:50,988 --> 00:04:52,771
Yes, we can.
107
00:04:55,525 --> 00:04:58,276
I hope we can still be
brother and sister.
108
00:05:01,498 --> 00:05:04,282
We can't stay
babies forever.
109
00:05:04,418 --> 00:05:08,119
We can't stay
babies forever.
110
00:05:08,255 --> 00:05:11,089
We can't stay
babies forever.
111
00:05:11,174 --> 00:05:12,841
We can't stay
babies forever.
112
00:05:15,929 --> 00:05:18,296
Now, remember, Peepers,
113
00:05:18,432 --> 00:05:21,099
no matter how cunningly
or forcefully
114
00:05:21,184 --> 00:05:23,802
I ask you for morphine,
you are to deny me.
115
00:05:23,887 --> 00:05:24,853
Yes, Madam.
116
00:05:24,972 --> 00:05:26,021
It is an order.
117
00:05:26,139 --> 00:05:27,806
Do you understand?
118
00:05:27,891 --> 00:05:29,524
Yes, Madam.
119
00:05:29,643 --> 00:05:31,977
- So may I have some morphine?
- Yes, Madam.
120
00:05:32,062 --> 00:05:34,446
That was a test.
121
00:05:34,531 --> 00:05:36,314
You are not
to give me morphine.
122
00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:37,565
Yes, Madam.
123
00:05:37,651 --> 00:05:39,618
May I please have
some morphine?
124
00:05:39,703 --> 00:05:42,570
- Yes, Madam.
- No! It should be, "No, Madam!"
125
00:05:42,656 --> 00:05:45,790
- Yes, Madam.
- So, again...
126
00:05:45,876 --> 00:05:47,959
can I have some morphine?
127
00:05:48,045 --> 00:05:50,328
- Yes, Madam.
- No!
128
00:05:50,414 --> 00:05:52,497
Don't you understand?
129
00:05:52,633 --> 00:05:56,835
Saying yes to you
is my morphine.
130
00:05:56,970 --> 00:05:59,504
I can stay a baby forever.
131
00:05:59,589 --> 00:06:02,390
I can stay a baby forever.
132
00:06:02,509 --> 00:06:04,592
I can stay a baby forever.
133
00:06:11,351 --> 00:06:14,185
Oh, yeah.
134
00:06:14,271 --> 00:06:16,905
Yeah, yeah.
135
00:06:19,526 --> 00:06:22,861
Oh! My lady,
those are snacking beets
136
00:06:22,996 --> 00:06:25,363
not beautification beets.
137
00:06:25,499 --> 00:06:28,249
How do I look?
138
00:06:28,368 --> 00:06:30,702
Is my lady quite sure
that she wants to rub a beet
139
00:06:30,837 --> 00:06:31,586
into her face?
140
00:06:31,705 --> 00:06:33,838
Mm-hmm.
Quite sure.
141
00:06:33,924 --> 00:06:35,173
And I'm not a lady.
142
00:06:35,258 --> 00:06:36,257
I'm a baby.
143
00:06:36,376 --> 00:06:38,877
I can stay
a baby forever.
144
00:06:38,962 --> 00:06:42,464
I see, my la--
my baby.
145
00:06:42,549 --> 00:06:45,517
Well, I shall place
this here.
146
00:06:48,055 --> 00:06:50,388
Do I need more?
147
00:06:50,474 --> 00:06:53,141
No, I think that's perfect.
148
00:06:53,226 --> 00:06:57,195
Maybe just a little more.
Mm-hmm.
149
00:06:57,280 --> 00:06:59,731
This way. Oops.
150
00:06:59,866 --> 00:07:02,567
- Through, go through!
- Garfield, what are you doing?
151
00:07:02,703 --> 00:07:04,369
I'm about to forever-sleep
these puppies
152
00:07:04,454 --> 00:07:07,706
- for Miss Lillian's cape.
- Oh, fun.
153
00:07:07,791 --> 00:07:10,825
Just wondering, do you think it's
strange that one of your duties
154
00:07:10,911 --> 00:07:13,578
is to kill puppies
for a woman's fashion?
155
00:07:13,663 --> 00:07:16,915
Hmm. No, I never
thought of it that way.
156
00:07:17,050 --> 00:07:19,751
Besides, it's not a cape
of puppies for Miss Lillian.
157
00:07:19,836 --> 00:07:24,305
It's a cape
of puppies for Mayor Cutie.
158
00:07:24,424 --> 00:07:26,257
Come on, push right through, Wiggles.
159
00:07:29,555 --> 00:07:32,722
We begin with two soups--
one hot, one cold--
160
00:07:32,808 --> 00:07:35,108
followed
by pheasant under glass,
161
00:07:35,227 --> 00:07:38,562
succeeded by quails from Egypt,
fattened in Switzerland,
162
00:07:38,697 --> 00:07:42,449
their wings mutilated by
the King of Siam's personal
163
00:07:42,568 --> 00:07:44,067
- wing mutilator...
- Yum.
164
00:07:44,203 --> 00:07:45,569
After which rabbit ears,
165
00:07:45,704 --> 00:07:47,904
which have been chopped
into a salade with...
166
00:07:48,040 --> 00:07:49,789
So how did you two meet?
Was it love at first sight?
167
00:07:49,908 --> 00:07:51,575
How'd Dumpling
get the name Dumpling?
168
00:07:51,660 --> 00:07:52,959
How'd you get the name Celery?
Tell me everything.
169
00:07:53,078 --> 00:07:54,911
Well, me and Freddy
met through your mother.
170
00:07:55,047 --> 00:07:56,546
No love yet,
but here's hoping.
171
00:07:56,632 --> 00:07:58,215
Dumpling got his name
because he looks
172
00:07:58,300 --> 00:07:59,833
like he's filled with potatoes,
and I got the name Celery
173
00:07:59,918 --> 00:08:02,636
because Papa always said
I took more energy than I gave.
174
00:08:04,089 --> 00:08:06,006
Father always tells me
I'm an energy-suck as well.
175
00:08:06,091 --> 00:08:08,925
Who knew we had so much in common?
176
00:08:10,846 --> 00:08:13,647
Our next course
is a halibut from Maine,
177
00:08:13,765 --> 00:08:18,435
lovingly glazed in
an orange-cranberry mostarda.
178
00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:21,438
I have an awkward question
for you, Lillian.
179
00:08:21,523 --> 00:08:24,241
Is that halibut
actually from Maine?
180
00:08:24,326 --> 00:08:27,661
Your butler, Poopers, just said
it, but I assume he was japing.
181
00:08:27,779 --> 00:08:30,030
Poopers, is that halibut
from Maine?
182
00:08:30,115 --> 00:08:32,616
I can almost smell the bearded
fisherman who caught it.
183
00:08:32,701 --> 00:08:34,384
Get rid of that poison!
184
00:08:34,486 --> 00:08:36,119
Garfield,
remove this atrocity at once!
185
00:08:36,205 --> 00:08:38,955
I apologize
one thousand-fold.
186
00:08:47,099 --> 00:08:48,882
You're quite handsome
when you throw out food
187
00:08:48,967 --> 00:08:51,051
a dog has spit out.
188
00:08:51,136 --> 00:08:53,303
Oh, thank you, Chair.
189
00:08:53,438 --> 00:08:55,055
Do you ever wonder
what it would be like to taste
190
00:08:55,140 --> 00:08:57,023
one tiny, little bite?
191
00:08:57,142 --> 00:08:59,476
I know I do,
but I'm not as brave as you.
192
00:08:59,561 --> 00:09:02,112
Maybe you could try it
and tell me what it's like.
193
00:09:02,197 --> 00:09:03,480
No, I could never!
194
00:09:03,565 --> 00:09:04,981
It's an unpardonable offense
195
00:09:05,067 --> 00:09:07,234
to eat that which is designated
for the upstairs.
196
00:09:07,319 --> 00:09:09,236
I must throw it
in the garbage.
197
00:09:09,321 --> 00:09:12,038
I'd love to see
just one small morsel
198
00:09:12,157 --> 00:09:15,875
in your perfect
little mouth.
199
00:09:17,212 --> 00:09:19,296
Well, I...
200
00:09:19,381 --> 00:09:23,250
guess I could have
one little nibble.
201
00:09:23,335 --> 00:09:25,001
Yes.
202
00:09:27,639 --> 00:09:29,673
It's like
a flaky little cloud!
203
00:09:29,758 --> 00:09:31,341
What did you say
this was called, again?
204
00:09:31,426 --> 00:09:33,843
- Food.
- Well, if this is food,
205
00:09:33,929 --> 00:09:35,679
then I'm glad
to have tried it.
206
00:09:35,764 --> 00:09:38,732
It makes working for gruel
that much more rewarding,
207
00:09:38,850 --> 00:09:42,686
knowing that real food is going
to its rightful place, upstairs.
208
00:09:42,771 --> 00:09:45,655
Well, I surely enjoyed
watching you do it.
209
00:09:45,741 --> 00:09:49,526
Well, then I am glad
to have danced with the fire.
210
00:09:59,421 --> 00:10:01,538
Product of a rape.
211
00:10:01,673 --> 00:10:03,173
Product of a rape.
212
00:10:03,258 --> 00:10:06,710
A double product of a rape.
213
00:10:06,795 --> 00:10:11,131
Now, you listen to me, girls,
especially you, Frederick!
214
00:10:11,216 --> 00:10:15,385
I've never told you this before,
but I love you.
215
00:10:37,376 --> 00:10:41,077
Bananas flambé.
216
00:10:49,304 --> 00:10:52,472
They don't like it.
Throw it away. Throw it away.
217
00:11:00,098 --> 00:11:03,066
I'm so sorry.
218
00:11:03,151 --> 00:11:05,568
Celery, I would like
to take this moment, if I may,
219
00:11:05,654 --> 00:11:08,238
to present a gift
to our most esteemed guest.
220
00:11:08,323 --> 00:11:11,408
Oh, Lillian, you didn't have
to get me anything.
221
00:11:11,493 --> 00:11:14,861
No, it's for Dumpling.
222
00:11:14,946 --> 00:11:17,113
Dumpling...
223
00:11:17,249 --> 00:11:18,832
please accept this gift
224
00:11:18,950 --> 00:11:23,370
on behalf of the entire
Bellacourt family.
225
00:11:23,455 --> 00:11:24,621
Oh, what a heavenly necklace.
226
00:11:24,756 --> 00:11:27,173
If only Dumpling
liked wearing emeralds.
227
00:11:27,292 --> 00:11:29,759
He's finicky,
but he really knows himself.
228
00:11:29,845 --> 00:11:31,795
I admire that about him.
229
00:11:34,466 --> 00:11:35,799
She's been acting this way
230
00:11:35,934 --> 00:11:37,967
ever since Frederick
announced his engagement.
231
00:11:38,053 --> 00:11:39,803
Has she done this kind of thing before?
232
00:11:39,888 --> 00:11:43,440
Once. Frederick invited a
young duchess to the cotillion,
233
00:11:43,525 --> 00:11:47,110
and Beatrice buried herself
alive in the radish garden.
234
00:11:47,195 --> 00:11:49,312
But this time
it seems serious.
235
00:11:49,398 --> 00:11:52,482
Oh, it's kielbasa time.
236
00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:54,984
I must be going.
I will leave this to you.
237
00:12:01,076 --> 00:12:04,825
Well, I see Miss Beatrice
is dressed like a little girl.
238
00:12:05,115 --> 00:12:07,354
Baby Bea, if you please.
239
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:09,200
How long have
you been a baby?
240
00:12:09,285 --> 00:12:10,618
Mm-mm-mm.
241
00:12:10,737 --> 00:12:13,904
Was it since
someone hurt you?
242
00:12:13,990 --> 00:12:17,208
And was that person
your brother, Freddy?
243
00:12:22,048 --> 00:12:23,247
Morphine!
244
00:12:27,503 --> 00:12:28,919
Control yourself, Madam!
245
00:12:29,055 --> 00:12:33,257
Damn it, man!
I need my sweet cherry dreams!
246
00:12:33,393 --> 00:12:35,509
I need to waltz
with the White Widow!
247
00:12:35,595 --> 00:12:37,228
Don't you remember?
248
00:12:37,313 --> 00:12:41,932
Don't you know the depths that
your addiction has taken you to?
249
00:12:42,018 --> 00:12:44,485
You sucked my dick, Madam!
250
00:12:46,739 --> 00:12:49,407
Madam, I cannot allow
such a proposition.
251
00:12:49,492 --> 00:12:52,777
Unbutton!
252
00:12:52,862 --> 00:12:54,278
Oh!
253
00:12:54,364 --> 00:12:55,863
You sucked my dick.
254
00:12:55,948 --> 00:12:56,947
I--
255
00:13:01,788 --> 00:13:03,287
Mayor Cutie
used to hate champagne,
256
00:13:03,423 --> 00:13:05,289
but then I just didn't give
her water for two weeks,
257
00:13:05,375 --> 00:13:06,424
and now she loves it.
258
00:13:06,509 --> 00:13:08,175
I remember when Mother
did that to me.
259
00:13:08,294 --> 00:13:12,296
Speaking of mothers, I'd like
to apologize for our mother.
260
00:13:12,382 --> 00:13:13,798
You mean
when she urinated on me?
261
00:13:13,883 --> 00:13:16,133
Think nothing of it.
These sorts of things happen.
262
00:13:16,219 --> 00:13:18,185
Well, I just want to make sure
that you understand
263
00:13:18,304 --> 00:13:20,688
that the Bellacourts, except for
Hortense, are a wonderful family
264
00:13:20,807 --> 00:13:24,275
with high ethics
and Christian values.
265
00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:26,360
- Hi, Frederick.
- Aah!
266
00:13:26,479 --> 00:13:28,696
Beatrice.
267
00:13:28,815 --> 00:13:32,283
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow, bow-wow ♪
268
00:13:32,368 --> 00:13:36,070
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow, bow-wow ♪
269
00:13:36,155 --> 00:13:38,205
♪ I've got a little cat-- ♪
270
00:13:38,324 --> 00:13:40,991
♪ and I'm very fond of that-- ♪
271
00:13:41,077 --> 00:13:44,578
♪ but I'd rather
have a bow-wow-wow ♪
272
00:13:44,664 --> 00:13:48,382
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow ♪
273
00:13:48,501 --> 00:13:51,719
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow ♪
274
00:13:51,838 --> 00:13:53,637
- Beatrice.
- Remember this song?
275
00:13:53,723 --> 00:13:55,389
Remember this song?
This was our song.
276
00:13:55,508 --> 00:13:58,976
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow ♪
277
00:14:01,564 --> 00:14:02,980
Okay, that is quite enough
of that.
278
00:14:03,065 --> 00:14:05,232
This is inappropriate
and highly erotic.
279
00:14:05,351 --> 00:14:06,650
I am an engaged man.
280
00:14:06,736 --> 00:14:08,486
Also,
she is your sister.
281
00:14:08,571 --> 00:14:11,355
Yes, there is that
as well.
282
00:14:11,491 --> 00:14:13,691
Fine!
283
00:14:24,838 --> 00:14:26,588
I hope that my sister
straddling my lap
284
00:14:26,723 --> 00:14:28,256
was not the worst thing
you have ever seen.
285
00:14:28,391 --> 00:14:30,642
I assure you, it is not.
286
00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:31,976
The worst thing I ever saw
287
00:14:32,095 --> 00:14:34,229
was an elephant
being hanged for no other reason
288
00:14:34,314 --> 00:14:37,148
than to amuse a large crowd
on a hot summer afternoon.
289
00:14:37,267 --> 00:14:40,134
Oh, summer really
is the best time for a hanging.
290
00:14:40,237 --> 00:14:42,320
Well, the beast
291
00:14:42,439 --> 00:14:45,740
was given large quantities
of ether prior to the execution.
292
00:14:45,825 --> 00:14:47,775
Chains were placed
around its neck
293
00:14:47,861 --> 00:14:50,328
to draw upon his windpipe
and choke him to death.
294
00:14:50,447 --> 00:14:51,613
Well, as the derrick rose,
295
00:14:51,748 --> 00:14:53,281
the beast
let out a terrific scream
296
00:14:53,366 --> 00:14:56,701
from paralysis of the spinal cord
and was dead within minutes.
297
00:14:56,786 --> 00:15:00,505
There was blood
everywhere.
298
00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:09,514
Oh, well, I hope
you brought a picnic.
299
00:15:09,633 --> 00:15:11,099
Tell me,
how much blood do you suppose
300
00:15:11,184 --> 00:15:13,134
could be drained
from an elephant?
301
00:15:13,270 --> 00:15:14,969
I believe enough
for a canoe ride.
302
00:15:15,055 --> 00:15:19,607
Can you imagine canoeing
on a lake of elephant blood?
303
00:15:19,693 --> 00:15:22,310
I believe
it would be magical.
304
00:15:23,730 --> 00:15:25,813
I believe it would be magical
as well.
305
00:15:25,949 --> 00:15:27,398
Lillian, once upon a time,
306
00:15:27,484 --> 00:15:30,485
I thought you were
a useless, unlovable, vile,
307
00:15:30,570 --> 00:15:31,786
tacky little thing.
308
00:15:31,871 --> 00:15:33,821
But now I see
you are quite amusing.
309
00:15:33,957 --> 00:15:37,542
Oh, Celery, I've been wanting
to be your friend for 30 years,
310
00:15:37,661 --> 00:15:40,328
and I'm only 27.
311
00:15:40,413 --> 00:15:42,880
Today means the world to me.
312
00:15:44,551 --> 00:15:46,634
I wanted to ask you
a little question.
313
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:49,003
Oh, Garfieldella,
if it's a girl.
314
00:15:49,089 --> 00:15:52,173
And, of course, Peepers Junior,
were we to have a son.
315
00:15:52,258 --> 00:15:55,009
Not my question,
but I'm glad to know it.
316
00:15:55,095 --> 00:15:56,894
I was wondering
if you had an extra key
317
00:15:57,013 --> 00:15:58,513
to Dodo's morphine cabinet.
318
00:15:58,598 --> 00:16:01,149
I wanted to impress you and show
you how clean I can make it.
319
00:16:01,234 --> 00:16:03,685
Why yes, of-- of course,
as underbutler,
320
00:16:03,770 --> 00:16:05,353
it is my privilege
to carry that key.
321
00:16:05,488 --> 00:16:07,572
Can I borrow it?
It will only take an hour.
322
00:16:07,691 --> 00:16:08,856
I'll make it shine.
323
00:16:08,942 --> 00:16:10,441
Oh, I'm sorry, Chair,
324
00:16:10,527 --> 00:16:12,744
but it would be breaking one of
the cardinal rules of the house,
325
00:16:12,862 --> 00:16:14,862
letting a woman hold a key.
326
00:16:14,998 --> 00:16:16,864
I know you can break
the rules.
327
00:16:16,950 --> 00:16:18,449
I saw you try
the halibut.
328
00:16:18,535 --> 00:16:21,419
Halibut is one thing,
but heroin is quite another.
329
00:16:21,538 --> 00:16:23,871
Now, I don't expect you
to understand the difference,
330
00:16:23,957 --> 00:16:27,508
but one is a drug,
and the other is fish.
331
00:16:27,594 --> 00:16:29,127
Please?
332
00:16:29,212 --> 00:16:34,182
You're such a big,
strong underbutler.
333
00:16:41,191 --> 00:16:44,859
Romantic fraternization
between the staff
334
00:16:44,944 --> 00:16:47,528
is the ultimate
rule violation.
335
00:16:47,614 --> 00:16:48,896
This is a terrible thing
to say
336
00:16:49,032 --> 00:16:51,315
to the hopeful future mother
of my children,
337
00:16:51,401 --> 00:16:54,235
but I am going to have
to report you.
338
00:16:54,371 --> 00:16:57,121
I will never, ever forget
this moment.
339
00:17:02,996 --> 00:17:05,463
Neither will I.
340
00:17:05,582 --> 00:17:07,248
Sorry?
341
00:17:07,333 --> 00:17:09,751
- No, nothing.
- Oh.
342
00:17:09,836 --> 00:17:12,420
I thought I heard
you say, "Neither will I."
343
00:17:12,555 --> 00:17:13,755
No.
344
00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:17,558
Right.
Well, off to report you.
345
00:17:17,644 --> 00:17:20,261
Thank you
very much, again.
346
00:17:22,599 --> 00:17:24,599
You've had quite an adventure
tonight, Madam.
347
00:17:24,684 --> 00:17:27,902
All that exercise
is bad for the uterus.
348
00:17:31,858 --> 00:17:33,608
- Sir?
- What is it, Chair?
349
00:17:33,693 --> 00:17:36,744
I'm afraid I have a terribly
important issue to discuss.
350
00:17:36,830 --> 00:17:38,613
What is it?
351
00:17:38,748 --> 00:17:40,948
Have you counted
the towels recently?
352
00:17:41,034 --> 00:17:43,167
I believe one is missing.
353
00:17:43,286 --> 00:17:45,203
Madam, please excuse me
for a moment
354
00:17:45,288 --> 00:17:46,754
while I tend to our guests.
355
00:17:46,840 --> 00:17:50,708
It seems Dumpling is not pleased
with our digestif selection.
356
00:17:50,794 --> 00:17:54,178
Chair will continue
mopping your junkie sweats.
357
00:17:59,969 --> 00:18:03,888
My lady, if you are in need of
just a touch of your morphine,
358
00:18:03,973 --> 00:18:06,891
you need only ask.
359
00:18:06,976 --> 00:18:08,643
Do you miss it?
360
00:18:08,728 --> 00:18:09,811
What I miss
are the days
361
00:18:09,896 --> 00:18:11,896
when if a servant
asked you a question,
362
00:18:11,981 --> 00:18:14,649
you could have
their tongue cut out.
363
00:18:14,734 --> 00:18:19,403
797, 798, 799.
364
00:18:19,489 --> 00:18:21,906
I have counted these towels
13 times,
365
00:18:21,991 --> 00:18:25,293
and each time
the number is 799.
366
00:18:25,378 --> 00:18:27,962
Bellacourt Manor
is an 800-towel estate.
367
00:18:28,047 --> 00:18:29,797
Whomever stole the towel,
please step forward.
368
00:18:29,883 --> 00:18:33,050
You'll be fired immediately,
no questions asked.
369
00:18:36,973 --> 00:18:38,923
- Garfield.
- Hmm?
370
00:18:39,008 --> 00:18:41,058
Garfield,
empty your breast.
371
00:18:45,265 --> 00:18:47,398
Is that a towel I see?
372
00:18:47,517 --> 00:18:49,517
Who?
373
00:18:49,652 --> 00:18:50,852
This is Towel?
374
00:18:50,937 --> 00:18:53,437
Chair gave her to me.
375
00:18:53,523 --> 00:18:54,655
And she kissed me.
376
00:18:56,242 --> 00:18:58,743
Enough!
It is stolen property!
377
00:18:58,862 --> 00:19:00,695
Garfield Leopold McGillicutty,
378
00:19:00,830 --> 00:19:03,915
you are hereby stripped of all
duties befitting an underbutler.
379
00:19:04,033 --> 00:19:05,416
Please remove your uniform
380
00:19:05,535 --> 00:19:07,785
and vacate the premises
immediately.
381
00:19:07,871 --> 00:19:10,454
You may pick up the clothes
you wore when you arrived.
382
00:19:10,540 --> 00:19:13,341
But when I came here,
I was six years old.
383
00:19:13,426 --> 00:19:16,043
Yes, back
when I saw something in you,
384
00:19:16,179 --> 00:19:21,015
something
that reminded me of...
385
00:19:21,100 --> 00:19:24,602
Servants, turn away.
386
00:19:26,272 --> 00:19:30,057
Nicholas, bang the pot.
387
00:19:31,144 --> 00:19:33,611
Dead man walking.
388
00:19:34,814 --> 00:19:37,064
Slower, Nick, slower.
389
00:19:48,077 --> 00:19:50,578
Go, boy.
390
00:19:50,713 --> 00:19:54,582
Go and find your way
in this wicked world.
391
00:20:01,438 --> 00:20:04,690
Well, I'm off to meet
and impress Celery's family.
392
00:20:04,775 --> 00:20:06,441
Thank you
for your hospitality, Lillian.
393
00:20:06,577 --> 00:20:08,076
Oh, if you're ever in need
of a plus-one
394
00:20:08,162 --> 00:20:09,828
to an elephant hanging,
you know who to call.
395
00:20:09,947 --> 00:20:11,530
I won't hesitate!
396
00:20:11,615 --> 00:20:13,782
You know,
you may have strange sisters,
397
00:20:13,918 --> 00:20:15,367
and your mother
is quite awful,
398
00:20:15,452 --> 00:20:17,035
and your brother seems to have
an erotic relationship
399
00:20:17,121 --> 00:20:20,088
to elephant death
and his own sister, but you...
400
00:20:20,174 --> 00:20:23,208
I like you, Lillian.
You throw one hell of a party.
401
00:20:23,294 --> 00:20:26,295
Let's grab tea
or an aperitif this week.
402
00:20:31,468 --> 00:20:32,601
Okay!
403
00:20:32,686 --> 00:20:34,219
Well, the party
had some slight hiccups,
404
00:20:34,305 --> 00:20:37,376
what with Beatrice's
nervous-breakdown incest-treptease.
405
00:20:37,377 --> 00:20:40,174
But, in the end,
Celery seems to be really impressed.
406
00:20:40,175 --> 00:20:41,630
What can I say?
407
00:20:41,631 --> 00:20:43,169
I throw one hell
of a party.
408
00:20:46,140 --> 00:20:49,418
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow ♪
409
00:20:49,419 --> 00:20:53,183
♪ daddy wouldn't buy me
a bow-wow ♪
410
00:20:53,222 --> 00:20:56,397
♪ I've got a little cat-- ♪
411
00:20:57,309 --> 00:20:59,800
Sync and corrections by n17t01
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