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Previously on Californication...
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My ex-wife is looking
for a new nanny for our son.
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Any interest?
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- You like that?
- No, Charlie!
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Hey, we could watch a movie
or something.
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- Inappropriate, Charlie.
- Right, that.
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How's Becca?
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Boyfriend.
I wanna kill him, Hank.
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A young, good-looking guy,
swoops in, starts sniffing
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around your one-and-only,
and you question his motives.
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But I really like your daughter.
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- He's you.
- What are you talking about?
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The kid's a loathsome,
fucking asshole.
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I'd like to introduce you
to Richard Bates.
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Haven't touched the stuff
since Slick Willie
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was in the White House.
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- Richard.
- Baby. Come on up, honey!
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Stop it.
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Tyler switched drinks,
thought it'd be funny
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to watch him get drunk.
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Jesus, that kid really is a young me.
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Want me to go after him?
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No, I don't.
Just let him run it off.
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Hey, can I come in?
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It's Richard, you know,
he won't stop drinking.
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I think I made
a terrible mistake, you know?
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Oh, fuck!
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Oh, fuck, please tell me we didn't.
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I can't tell you that.
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- Oh, my God.
- I-I-I won't tell you that.
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- Y-y-you don't remember?
- No.
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- Anything?
- No.
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Of course we did.
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It was pretty epic stuff, too.
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It was like a goddamn sex opera.
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Your aria was beautiful, by the way.
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Oh, my God, this is so fucked up.
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Yeah...and not even
remotely true.
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- Really?
- Gimme a break, lady.
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I didn't even lay a hand on you.
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Do you really think I'd take
advantage of a married woman
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in such a sorry state?
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That's not very nice.
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Oh, God, all I remember is, like...
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having a couple of drinks
and then--
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Which, for you, is like the equivalent
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of getting totally blotto.
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I know--
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- No--
- Come on.
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Give me a little tongue
for being good!
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Thank you, thank you
for not taking advantage
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of me when I'm sure
you totally could have.
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Now you tell me.
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Whoa.
Batesy?
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What the fuck, dude?
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Hank.
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Talk to me, buddy.
Use your words.
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Quietly.
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Hank, I woke up
in a strange woman's bed.
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Oh.
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I mean, she was naked, Hank.
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Incredibly naked.
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I got it.
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I can't find my wedding ring.
I'm fucked!
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Shh!
Inside voice.
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I can't go home
and face Karen like this.
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Been there.
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Why don't we do this?
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Hey, Batesy.
Batesy, stay.
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Stay.
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Hey, did I hear someone crying?
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Oh, yeah, that's just Charlie.
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- Oh, my God--
- No, he's fine.
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He cries a lot, wouldn't you?
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Let's go to see--
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You wanna go grab some breakfast?
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Uh, no. N-n-no.
Not hungry.
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- No?
- Tummy troubles, actually.
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Too much booze and marital woe.
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Yeah, it was like watching
a very special episode
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of Real Housewives of somewhere lame.
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- I--
- Yeah...
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I think you should go, Karen.
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I think you gotta go.
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What? Wha--
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No. I-I just kind of figured
you'd wanna hang out
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- for a while--
- Oh, all right, all right.
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So I'm like some lovelorn puppy,
you throw me a bone,
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I'm supposed to roll over,
lick my balls, and fetch?
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Is that it?
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Well, maybe next time, Karen.
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Peace be with you.
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Off you go.
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Batesy!
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Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com
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Pretty grim, Batesy.
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How the fuck did you end up here?
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Ah, I just remember
drinking myself blind,
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getting into a cab.
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Told the guy to take me to
a fucking strip club,
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and after that, it's just
a blur of titties and beer.
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Oh, shit.
This way.
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Oh, God.
Oh, God.
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Hello?
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Oh, hey. Hey!
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Bates!
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You snuck out on me,
you tricky little dicky, you!
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She knows my name, Hank.
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Yes, indeed, she does...
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And she appears to have
your wedding ring, too.
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You know, I'm going to be, uh, sick.
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Uh, may I--
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Oh, you know where the bathroom is.
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Down the hall and to the left.
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That's where I shot you up last night!
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I'm just kidding.
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- Hank.
- Oh, Holly.
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Holly. Okay.
So, uh...
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What's it gonna take if the man
needs his wedding ring back?
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Oh, well, I mean, I understand,
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and I'm totally sympathetic,
but he did pay me with it.
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The guy went to town in the VIP room.
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Dance after dance after dance.
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I shook my moneymaker to an
entire album for him.
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Guns n' Roses.
Appetite.
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- Great album, great album.
- The best.
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Lost my cherry to it.
Front and back.
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Hmm.
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How much...
Is it gonna--
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Come on.
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- These are 20s.
- I know. Come on.
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Okay.
That's it.
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Not a dollar more.
That's what I'm owed.
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Mm-hmm.
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Can I ask you a question?
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Sure thing, Hank.
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Did you guys, uh,
you know--
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- Fuck?
- Yeah.
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What do you think, I'm a slut?
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You think just because
I dance naked for money,
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- that I'm an easy lay?
- No.
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Oh, really?
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Well, no, actually.
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We came back here,
we brewed some mint tea,
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curled up on the sofa,
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and watched some British television.
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Return to Cranford.
Have you seen it?
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- Oh, it's a real treat.
- Hmm.
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Of course we fucked!
The guy's an animal.
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Come on.
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Did he wear a rubber?
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Oh, no glove, no love.
That's my policy.
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That's a solid policy.
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- Hi, Charlie.
- Hi, Lizzie.
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Can I come in?
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Ooh, do you think it's appropriate?
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In this case, yes.
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I just wanted
to say good-bye.
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Good-bye?
What are you talking about?
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You just said hello.
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Marcy let me go.
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Really?
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As in, fired you?
Why?
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Well, it's a long story, but...
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Basically, she thinks I was trying
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- to seduce her husband.
- Were you?
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Stu's not exactly my type, Charlie.
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He has a very big penis.
Seriously.
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It's like a pile of snakes
with an apple on top.
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That's disgusting, Charlie.
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Very.
So, what happened?
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Well, Stuart was taking a nap,
and it was so hot in the hills.
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I thought I'd go for a swim.
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They're always encouraging me
to use their pool.
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I didn't have a bathing suit.
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Continue...please.
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But no one was home.
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Mr. Beggs,
I am so sorry!
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Stuart's asleep, and I thought
I was here alone.
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No apologies, dear.
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You have a magnificent body.
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And call me Stu.
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00:09:00,446 --> 00:09:03,947
- So, you were naked.
- Completely.
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00:09:03,949 --> 00:09:06,583
And I think he must've said
something to Marcy,
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00:09:06,585 --> 00:09:08,619
and she thought it was inappropriate.
186
00:09:08,621 --> 00:09:10,354
And then suddenly,
she started screaming,
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and I was fired.
Charlie?
188
00:09:17,295 --> 00:09:19,063
You let me see what I can do.
189
00:09:19,065 --> 00:09:20,664
I'll--I'll go talk to them.
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00:09:20,666 --> 00:09:23,467
Thank you, Charlie, you're a dream.
191
00:09:23,469 --> 00:09:28,472
Now, just so I'm clear,
you were totally naked?
192
00:09:28,474 --> 00:09:29,973
- Yes, Charlie.
- Okay.
193
00:09:29,975 --> 00:09:32,075
Good.
Got it.
194
00:09:32,077 --> 00:09:35,078
Yeah. Um, do you mind terribly
if I use your shower?
195
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:37,748
It's just--I feel so dirty
and disgusting after all this.
196
00:09:37,750 --> 00:09:41,886
No problem at all!
Be my guest.
197
00:09:44,523 --> 00:09:45,890
- Um--
- Yes.
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00:09:45,892 --> 00:09:48,125
I'll be totally naked
in your shower Charlie.
199
00:09:48,127 --> 00:09:49,060
Excellent!
200
00:09:54,767 --> 00:09:57,102
Fuck it, I gotta know.
Did she say what happened?
201
00:09:57,104 --> 00:09:58,302
Who?
202
00:09:58,304 --> 00:10:00,505
- The stripper, goddamn it!
- Ah, yeah.
203
00:10:00,507 --> 00:10:02,140
Right, the stripper.
You really wanna know?
204
00:10:02,142 --> 00:10:05,210
No! But I gotta know what
I'm dealing with here.
205
00:10:05,212 --> 00:10:07,980
Like, if I cheated
on this woman, this...
206
00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:11,049
incredible fucking goddess
of a woman, my queen--
207
00:10:11,051 --> 00:10:13,818
I gotta come clean, Hank.
208
00:10:13,820 --> 00:10:15,820
She's been through too much.
209
00:10:15,822 --> 00:10:17,121
No offense.
210
00:10:17,123 --> 00:10:20,691
Some taken.
211
00:10:20,693 --> 00:10:24,427
All right, well this
is what she told me.
212
00:10:24,429 --> 00:10:27,396
She said she brought you home,
and she was down for anything.
213
00:10:27,398 --> 00:10:29,932
And you were tempted,
but you fought her off.
214
00:10:30,936 --> 00:10:32,002
Said you were in love with your wife.
215
00:10:32,004 --> 00:10:33,003
You couldn't do it.
216
00:10:33,005 --> 00:10:35,505
You couldn't even get it up!
217
00:10:35,507 --> 00:10:37,973
Jesus.
218
00:10:37,975 --> 00:10:40,042
I'm relieved, but ashamed.
219
00:10:40,044 --> 00:10:41,310
The drinking does that to a man.
220
00:10:41,312 --> 00:10:43,645
Well, it happens to the best of us.
221
00:10:43,647 --> 00:10:45,515
- Jesus.
- Not really.
222
00:10:45,517 --> 00:10:47,217
I'm so relieved.
223
00:10:47,219 --> 00:10:51,554
Thank you.
224
00:10:51,556 --> 00:10:54,256
- Why? Why?
- Ex-exactly!
225
00:10:54,258 --> 00:10:56,225
- Yeah, why?
- Why? You tell me why.
226
00:10:56,227 --> 00:10:59,594
Why must two men be confined
to handshakes and hugs?
227
00:10:59,596 --> 00:11:01,429
What happens when that's not enough?
228
00:11:01,431 --> 00:11:02,863
You come out of the closet!
229
00:11:02,865 --> 00:11:04,832
What?
230
00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:07,100
For such a fine man,
you're so damn limited.
231
00:11:07,102 --> 00:11:09,235
It's a burden, but I cope.
232
00:11:09,237 --> 00:11:11,204
How 'bout a breath mint, dude?
233
00:11:11,206 --> 00:11:12,205
You know, you been throwing up
all morning.
234
00:11:12,207 --> 00:11:15,208
Yeah, what's your excuse?
235
00:11:15,210 --> 00:11:17,511
So you just fire her just like that?
236
00:11:17,513 --> 00:11:19,780
No second chance, no--
237
00:11:19,782 --> 00:11:21,782
Yeah, well, she's a dirty little slut!
238
00:11:21,784 --> 00:11:23,750
Hey!
Lizzie is many things.
239
00:11:23,752 --> 00:11:26,086
"Dirty little slut"
certainly isn't one of them.
240
00:11:26,088 --> 00:11:29,123
Who swims naked in a pool when
the man of the house is home?
241
00:11:29,125 --> 00:11:30,925
She was hot!
242
00:11:30,927 --> 00:11:32,693
She thought she was alone!
243
00:11:32,695 --> 00:11:34,461
Why are you defending her so much?
244
00:11:34,463 --> 00:11:36,496
Because she's great with our son!
245
00:11:36,498 --> 00:11:38,832
Yo! I'm done.
246
00:11:38,834 --> 00:11:41,868
Did my best.
You're up, Marcy.
247
00:11:41,870 --> 00:11:44,803
I fucking hate not having a nanny!
248
00:11:48,341 --> 00:11:50,842
What about you,
big-time movie producer?
249
00:11:50,844 --> 00:11:52,811
You have no say in this?
250
00:11:52,813 --> 00:11:57,784
Charlie, I've produced movies.
Big, small.
251
00:11:57,786 --> 00:12:00,654
I've run two studios.
I have managed the egos
252
00:12:00,656 --> 00:12:03,424
of some of the greatest movie
stars in the world,
253
00:12:03,426 --> 00:12:06,060
but I cannot boss this woman around.
254
00:12:06,062 --> 00:12:07,295
She rules the roost.
255
00:12:07,297 --> 00:12:09,196
Which is just a fancy way of saying
256
00:12:09,198 --> 00:12:11,099
you're fucking
pussy-whipped.
257
00:12:11,101 --> 00:12:13,935
Precisely.
258
00:12:13,937 --> 00:12:16,704
Besides, there was
something weird about it.
259
00:12:16,706 --> 00:12:17,838
What?
260
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:20,074
The thing with Lizzie.
261
00:12:20,076 --> 00:12:21,141
What do you mean?
262
00:12:21,143 --> 00:12:25,111
I mean, there was a strange vibe.
263
00:12:46,367 --> 00:12:48,435
I'm so sorry,
Mr. Beggs.
264
00:12:48,437 --> 00:12:50,471
Stuart's asleep.
I thought that no one was home.
265
00:12:50,473 --> 00:12:53,942
No need to apologize, and call me Stu!
266
00:12:56,446 --> 00:12:57,978
You have a magnificent body!
267
00:12:57,980 --> 00:12:59,213
Thank you!
268
00:12:59,215 --> 00:13:01,615
Do you think I have what
it takes to be an actress?
269
00:13:01,617 --> 00:13:04,385
Yes.
270
00:13:04,387 --> 00:13:07,955
I don't see Lizzie as
the kind of girl to just...
271
00:13:07,957 --> 00:13:10,992
throw herself at some
creepy old married guy.
272
00:13:10,994 --> 00:13:14,997
Runkle...
273
00:13:14,999 --> 00:13:17,567
I know I am not a handsome man,
274
00:13:17,569 --> 00:13:19,736
but I am a very successful man.
275
00:13:19,738 --> 00:13:22,439
I know what it's like to be
hit on by pretty young things
276
00:13:22,441 --> 00:13:24,375
who want something from me.
277
00:13:24,377 --> 00:13:28,947
Must be nice.
Wish I did.
278
00:13:33,185 --> 00:13:38,222
Whew! Do not go in there
for at least 24 hours.
279
00:13:38,224 --> 00:13:39,490
Okay.
280
00:13:39,492 --> 00:13:40,858
Hey, look at that.
That's neat.
281
00:13:40,860 --> 00:13:41,859
- Thank you.
- Can I play with it?
282
00:13:41,861 --> 00:13:42,893
No! Please don't touch--
283
00:13:42,895 --> 00:13:43,994
- Do you have matchbox cars?
- No!
284
00:13:43,996 --> 00:13:46,196
I have a pitch to a client tomorrow.
285
00:13:46,198 --> 00:13:48,064
How's Batesy?
286
00:13:48,066 --> 00:13:51,233
He's asleep, you know,
sleeping it off upstairs.
287
00:13:51,235 --> 00:13:52,769
How are you?
288
00:13:52,771 --> 00:13:54,103
Well, what can I do?
289
00:13:54,105 --> 00:13:56,039
I mean, he's going through
a crisis, you know?
290
00:13:56,041 --> 00:13:58,943
If I--if I throw him out,
if I leave,
291
00:13:58,945 --> 00:14:00,678
then it's just gonna get worse, right?
292
00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:03,414
So that's it? You're just
gonna stand by your man?
293
00:14:03,416 --> 00:14:07,185
That's what I do.
294
00:14:07,187 --> 00:14:09,454
Thanks for bringing him home,
by the way.
295
00:14:09,456 --> 00:14:10,856
It's my pleasure,
296
00:14:10,858 --> 00:14:13,793
and I--and I wanna apologize for
that weirdness this morning.
297
00:14:13,795 --> 00:14:17,330
You know I love spending any
amount of time with you,
298
00:14:17,332 --> 00:14:20,200
however chaste.
299
00:14:20,202 --> 00:14:22,136
Could you get it?
It's probably just Tyler.
300
00:14:22,138 --> 00:14:24,072
Oh, fabulous.
301
00:14:24,074 --> 00:14:26,875
Stop it.
C-could you say sorry?
302
00:14:26,877 --> 00:14:29,645
- I did!
- No, again, like you mean it.
303
00:14:33,216 --> 00:14:35,951
- Oh!
- What the fuck, stripper?
304
00:14:35,953 --> 00:14:37,519
I found this on the bedroom floor,
305
00:14:37,521 --> 00:14:39,088
and I thought that maybe
he'd want it back!
306
00:14:39,090 --> 00:14:40,890
Have you no shame?
He's a married man!
307
00:14:40,892 --> 00:14:42,892
Oh, so what? I didn't come
here to tell his wife
308
00:14:42,894 --> 00:14:44,093
that he bangs strippers on the side.
309
00:14:44,095 --> 00:14:45,494
He doesn't bang strippers on the side.
310
00:14:45,496 --> 00:14:47,196
He's got a drinking problem
is all--a little one.
311
00:14:47,198 --> 00:14:49,665
Oh, I'll say.
Guy's a fuckin' lunatic.
312
00:14:49,667 --> 00:14:50,766
He wanted me to shove
a dildo up his ass
313
00:14:50,768 --> 00:14:51,801
and jerk him off at the same time.
314
00:14:51,803 --> 00:14:52,902
Oh!
Come on!
315
00:14:52,904 --> 00:14:54,504
- What is that called again?
- Painful?
316
00:14:54,506 --> 00:14:56,273
- No, the digging to China?
- Against God?
317
00:14:56,275 --> 00:14:57,340
The fi--th-th-the fire hose.
318
00:14:57,342 --> 00:14:59,810
- N-n-n-no. The bazooka.
- Wow.
319
00:14:59,812 --> 00:15:01,278
No, no, no, the shotgun.
That's what--
320
00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:02,846
Okay. Yeah, okay, okay.
321
00:15:02,848 --> 00:15:04,014
Oh, God.
I'm sorry.
322
00:15:04,016 --> 00:15:05,849
I got so much crazy shit
goin' on up here.
323
00:15:05,851 --> 00:15:07,784
I'll say.
324
00:15:07,786 --> 00:15:10,020
Well, so, I'm here with his wallet.
325
00:15:10,022 --> 00:15:11,120
- Cool.
- Yeah.
326
00:15:11,122 --> 00:15:12,588
Hand it over, stripper.
Be on your way.
327
00:15:12,590 --> 00:15:15,358
No finder's fee?
328
00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:20,729
What, is everything tip-based
with you people?
329
00:15:20,731 --> 00:15:25,066
There you go.
330
00:15:25,068 --> 00:15:26,635
Not much room there.
331
00:15:26,637 --> 00:15:29,003
Mm-hmm. It's been a pleasure
doing business with you, Hank.
332
00:15:29,005 --> 00:15:31,172
How do I know you didn't take
anything out of his wallet?
333
00:15:31,174 --> 00:15:34,342
Well, I'm not a fuckin' thief,
you asshole. Jesus.
334
00:15:34,344 --> 00:15:36,612
You know, no good deed
goes unpunished in this town.
335
00:15:36,614 --> 00:15:37,913
Yes, that's right.
336
00:15:37,915 --> 00:15:40,148
You're a regular girl scout,
aren't ya?
337
00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:41,416
- What's your part in all this?
- What do you mean?
338
00:15:41,418 --> 00:15:42,818
Well, he's married.
339
00:15:42,820 --> 00:15:44,853
He lives in the big house
behind the white picket fence,
340
00:15:44,855 --> 00:15:47,322
so who the fuck are you?
His gay lover?
341
00:15:49,226 --> 00:15:54,462
If you must know,
his wife is my baby mama.
342
00:15:54,464 --> 00:15:56,665
Come here.
343
00:15:56,667 --> 00:15:57,666
Who's that?
344
00:15:57,668 --> 00:15:59,201
My girlfriend.
345
00:15:59,203 --> 00:16:00,302
- Holly.
- Holly.
346
00:16:00,304 --> 00:16:01,303
- Holly!
- Yeah.
347
00:16:01,305 --> 00:16:02,404
- Karen.
- Karen.
348
00:16:02,406 --> 00:16:04,706
It's so nice to meet you, Holly.
349
00:16:04,708 --> 00:16:07,743
Um, well, you guys
wanna come in, or--
350
00:16:07,745 --> 00:16:09,011
No, no, she's just meeting me here.
351
00:16:09,013 --> 00:16:11,146
We're going hiking.
352
00:16:11,148 --> 00:16:12,315
You hike?
353
00:16:12,317 --> 00:16:13,383
Oh, yeah!
Of course I do.
354
00:16:13,385 --> 00:16:15,518
I love it.
Love it.
355
00:16:15,520 --> 00:16:17,320
Where?
356
00:16:17,322 --> 00:16:19,423
Um, gonna go up,
357
00:16:19,425 --> 00:16:23,527
uh, Mander...Hoff Canyon.
358
00:16:23,529 --> 00:16:25,396
- I haven't heard of that.
- Me neither!
359
00:16:25,398 --> 00:16:27,332
Well, th-that's why I like it!
It's less crowded.
360
00:16:27,334 --> 00:16:29,000
Road less traveled and whatnot.
361
00:16:29,002 --> 00:16:32,003
You gotta watch out
for the snakes, though.
362
00:16:32,005 --> 00:16:34,372
You know what, Karen?
I would love to come inside.
363
00:16:34,374 --> 00:16:36,708
- No, no.
- You have a beautiful home.
364
00:16:36,710 --> 00:16:39,378
Thank you, Holly.
Please come in.
365
00:16:39,380 --> 00:16:43,983
Welcome.
366
00:16:43,985 --> 00:16:45,251
Is she a stripper?
367
00:16:45,253 --> 00:16:47,254
No, she's just workin'
her way through school.
368
00:16:47,256 --> 00:16:49,622
Don't be so fuckin' judgmental,
Karen. God.
369
00:16:59,899 --> 00:17:01,900
- Jesus!
- Charlie!
370
00:17:01,902 --> 00:17:04,202
That was a long fucking shower!
371
00:17:04,204 --> 00:17:05,703
I'm so sorry.
I dozed off.
372
00:17:05,705 --> 00:17:07,271
I was upset, and I sat
on the couch for a second,
373
00:17:07,273 --> 00:17:09,273
and before I knew it,
two hours had gone by.
374
00:17:09,275 --> 00:17:12,642
It's okay. I just--
I-I got scared.
375
00:17:12,644 --> 00:17:14,878
Now, I'm delighted.
376
00:17:14,880 --> 00:17:16,981
I'm just really out of sorts.
377
00:17:16,983 --> 00:17:18,282
I've just lost another job,
378
00:17:18,284 --> 00:17:20,851
and I spent all this money
on acting classes.
379
00:17:20,853 --> 00:17:22,519
Acting classes?
380
00:17:22,521 --> 00:17:24,054
What happened to writing
children's books?
381
00:17:24,056 --> 00:17:26,489
Wh-wh-what happened to going
to cooking school?
382
00:17:26,491 --> 00:17:29,158
I told you.
I change my mind all the time.
383
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:31,561
I haven't found myself yet.
384
00:17:31,563 --> 00:17:34,631
Besides, Stu said he thinks
I might have what it takes
385
00:17:34,633 --> 00:17:35,999
to be an actress.
386
00:17:36,001 --> 00:17:39,669
Well, you certainly got
the beauty part down pat.
387
00:17:39,671 --> 00:17:43,974
You're so sweet to me, Charlie.
388
00:17:43,976 --> 00:17:47,879
What can I say, you, uh,
summon the sweetness in me.
389
00:17:50,282 --> 00:17:54,986
As well as some other stuff.
390
00:17:54,988 --> 00:17:56,420
Yes, I can tell.
391
00:17:56,422 --> 00:17:59,322
Well, guess what.
392
00:17:59,324 --> 00:18:02,091
What?
393
00:18:02,093 --> 00:18:04,260
I don't work
for Stu and Marcy anymore.
394
00:18:04,262 --> 00:18:06,528
I know.
You told me.
395
00:18:06,530 --> 00:18:10,365
So, this whole thing isn't
quite as inappropriate
396
00:18:10,367 --> 00:18:12,067
as it once was.
397
00:18:12,069 --> 00:18:16,103
I guess it's not.
398
00:18:16,105 --> 00:18:17,304
So...
399
00:18:17,306 --> 00:18:21,575
I guess it wouldn't be
inappropriate...
400
00:18:21,577 --> 00:18:24,178
to do this.
401
00:18:30,384 --> 00:18:31,984
Not at all.
402
00:18:31,986 --> 00:18:36,555
Just like it's not
inappropriate to do this.
403
00:18:43,797 --> 00:18:46,398
- So, Holly, y-you're a dancer.
- Yeah.
404
00:18:46,400 --> 00:18:49,567
Oh, actually, Karen, no.
I am a stripper.
405
00:18:49,569 --> 00:18:51,870
And I'm a realist.
406
00:18:51,872 --> 00:18:55,674
It's like, do you go to the cinema,
407
00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:57,109
or do you go to the movies?
408
00:18:57,111 --> 00:18:59,378
I don't know about you,
but I go to the fuckin' movies.
409
00:18:59,380 --> 00:19:02,014
- Right.
- How 'bout you, handsome?
410
00:19:02,016 --> 00:19:03,082
Huh?
411
00:19:03,084 --> 00:19:05,051
You like strippers?
Or dancers?
412
00:19:05,053 --> 00:19:08,588
Oh, strip--
dancers.
413
00:19:08,590 --> 00:19:09,923
You're fuckin' hot, dude.
414
00:19:09,925 --> 00:19:12,492
You in a band?
415
00:19:12,494 --> 00:19:14,394
Kind of a boyfriend-girlfriend
thing goin' on--
416
00:19:14,396 --> 00:19:17,364
No, I'm not in a band,
but I do play some guitar.
417
00:19:17,366 --> 00:19:20,000
Ooh, guitarists are the best!
418
00:19:20,002 --> 00:19:22,570
So good with their
fuckin' hands! Right?
419
00:19:22,572 --> 00:19:24,672
They know how to find the spot.
Right, baby?
420
00:19:24,674 --> 00:19:26,508
And then that guitar,
421
00:19:26,510 --> 00:19:28,877
up on stage,
it's like this pulsing member,
422
00:19:28,879 --> 00:19:30,913
and they're just workin' it,
and workin' it, and workin' it.
423
00:19:30,915 --> 00:19:34,049
I mean, you know what I'm
talking about. Right, honey?
424
00:19:34,051 --> 00:19:37,086
I don't wanna know if she
knows what you're talking about.
425
00:19:37,088 --> 00:19:40,557
Am I gonna have to get
used to this one, dad?
426
00:19:40,559 --> 00:19:44,494
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm not very domesticated.
427
00:19:44,496 --> 00:19:45,829
Yeah, just don't pee on the rug.
428
00:19:45,831 --> 00:19:49,066
Oh, I did that once!
At Vince Neil's house,
429
00:19:49,068 --> 00:19:51,502
I was so drunk,
I just squatted on the floor,
430
00:19:51,504 --> 00:19:53,837
and I peed everywhere.
431
00:19:53,839 --> 00:19:55,806
He thought it was hot.
432
00:19:55,808 --> 00:19:59,942
That's nice.
So, where'd you guys meet?
433
00:19:59,944 --> 00:20:01,844
Oh, backstage at a Motley show.
434
00:20:01,846 --> 00:20:04,814
I had to wrap my lips
around the tour manager.
435
00:20:04,816 --> 00:20:07,216
- It was totally worth it.
- I think she means us.
436
00:20:07,218 --> 00:20:10,619
Oh, right.
Right. Um--
437
00:20:10,621 --> 00:20:13,488
- Trader Joe's.
- Yeah.
438
00:20:13,490 --> 00:20:17,325
He was handling the melons!
439
00:20:17,327 --> 00:20:18,927
No.
440
00:20:22,332 --> 00:20:24,899
So, you two used to
be a couple, right?
441
00:20:24,901 --> 00:20:26,768
And this is your little girl.
442
00:20:26,770 --> 00:20:29,271
So now, when does Bates
enter the picture?
443
00:20:29,273 --> 00:20:30,505
How do you know Richard?
444
00:20:30,507 --> 00:20:33,575
She doesn't.
I just told her about him.
445
00:20:33,577 --> 00:20:35,310
Why?
446
00:20:35,312 --> 00:20:37,912
'Cause he's such a fuckin'
character, Karen. That's why.
447
00:20:37,914 --> 00:20:41,749
Totally.
448
00:20:41,751 --> 00:20:43,718
- I mean, from what I've heard.
- Yeah.
449
00:20:49,323 --> 00:20:53,493
So, um, anyone want another drink?
450
00:20:53,495 --> 00:20:54,828
I do!
451
00:20:54,830 --> 00:20:56,430
- I'll give you a hand, mom.
- Thanks, sweetie.
452
00:20:56,432 --> 00:20:58,199
I'm gonna come with you guys.
453
00:20:58,201 --> 00:21:00,168
I need to use the ladies' room.
454
00:21:00,170 --> 00:21:04,039
I gotta pee like a fuckin' racehorse.
455
00:21:05,309 --> 00:21:10,480
Way to go, Hank.
456
00:21:10,482 --> 00:21:12,049
Really nice girl you got
yourself there.
457
00:21:12,051 --> 00:21:13,817
Class up the wazoo.
458
00:21:13,819 --> 00:21:14,951
Shut up.
459
00:21:14,953 --> 00:21:16,352
Yeah, whatever, look.
What I wanna know is...
460
00:21:16,354 --> 00:21:19,957
Did Bates fuck
that chick or something?
461
00:21:19,959 --> 00:21:22,626
What? You're talking
about my girlfriend.
462
00:21:22,628 --> 00:21:24,895
Oh, bullshit.
That chick is not your type.
463
00:21:24,897 --> 00:21:26,864
What the fuck do you know
about my type?
464
00:21:26,866 --> 00:21:28,432
I know your type, and she's inside.
465
00:21:28,434 --> 00:21:31,035
And she's not the one pissing
"like a fuckin' racehorse."
466
00:21:31,037 --> 00:21:34,739
My question is, why are you
working so very hard
467
00:21:34,741 --> 00:21:38,843
to protect her from the truth?
468
00:21:38,845 --> 00:21:41,580
Well, maybe she's been
through enough, all right?
469
00:21:41,582 --> 00:21:44,349
Okay, yeah, but maybe
she and Bates don't make it,
470
00:21:44,351 --> 00:21:47,118
and then you've got yourself
another shot at the good life.
471
00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:48,686
Mind your business, son.
472
00:21:48,688 --> 00:21:50,989
And don't think I haven't
entertained that very notion.
473
00:21:50,991 --> 00:21:53,759
But my strict moral code
prohibits me...
474
00:21:53,761 --> 00:21:54,993
- Fair enough.
- Acting on it.
475
00:21:54,995 --> 00:21:57,997
Mm-hmm.
476
00:21:57,999 --> 00:22:01,066
I've been meaning to ask you...
477
00:22:01,068 --> 00:22:02,067
Would you do a favor for me?
478
00:22:02,069 --> 00:22:03,469
No.
479
00:22:03,471 --> 00:22:07,473
No? That quick?
Really?
480
00:22:07,475 --> 00:22:10,376
What?
481
00:22:10,378 --> 00:22:11,510
Will you read my screenplay?
482
00:22:11,512 --> 00:22:12,779
Fuck you.
483
00:22:12,781 --> 00:22:14,915
Okay.
484
00:22:14,917 --> 00:22:17,651
Well, just so you know...
485
00:22:17,653 --> 00:22:21,555
I don't have the same strict
moral code that you do, Hank.
486
00:22:23,925 --> 00:22:26,927
- I give it ten pages.
- Thank you.
487
00:22:47,318 --> 00:22:51,521
That...was exquisite!
488
00:22:51,523 --> 00:22:53,890
Best sex of my life!
Did you see how long I lasted?
489
00:22:55,026 --> 00:23:00,163
Huh? Oh, no. No, n...
You're crying.
490
00:23:00,165 --> 00:23:02,499
Of course you're crying.
491
00:23:02,501 --> 00:23:04,735
I dirtied you.
I'm so sorry.
492
00:23:04,737 --> 00:23:08,839
I just don't know
what I'm going to do now.
493
00:23:14,347 --> 00:23:16,346
F--
Hello?
494
00:23:16,348 --> 00:23:18,048
Have you talked to Lizzie?
495
00:23:18,050 --> 00:23:19,149
No.
496
00:23:19,151 --> 00:23:21,384
Well, I left her a bunch of messages,
497
00:23:21,386 --> 00:23:22,952
and she's not calling me back.
498
00:23:22,954 --> 00:23:25,654
Why should she? You fired her
for no fucking reason.
499
00:23:25,656 --> 00:23:28,190
Okay, so I'm hiring her back,
500
00:23:28,192 --> 00:23:29,824
because Stuart's
a little fuckin' nightmare,
501
00:23:29,826 --> 00:23:31,426
and she's got the magic touch.
502
00:23:31,428 --> 00:23:35,063
She certainly does.
503
00:23:35,065 --> 00:23:38,667
Well, if I see her,
I will let her know.
504
00:23:38,669 --> 00:23:40,502
Thanks.
505
00:23:40,504 --> 00:23:41,836
Hey, you wouldn't wanna come over here
506
00:23:41,838 --> 00:23:43,538
and see if you could put
Stuart down, would you--
507
00:23:43,540 --> 00:23:45,140
Hello?
508
00:23:49,213 --> 00:23:51,981
- Guess what.
- What?
509
00:23:51,983 --> 00:23:54,984
Looks like someone got you
your job back.
510
00:23:54,986 --> 00:23:58,154
Thank you, Charlie.
511
00:23:58,156 --> 00:24:01,258
I guess...
512
00:24:01,260 --> 00:24:02,626
this isn't quite so...
513
00:24:02,628 --> 00:24:04,861
appropriate anymore?
514
00:24:04,863 --> 00:24:09,566
Well, I haven't officially
accepted the position yet.
515
00:24:09,568 --> 00:24:12,402
- Ah.
- Uh-huh.
516
00:24:21,981 --> 00:24:25,049
♪ Well, she loves my cock ♪
517
00:24:25,051 --> 00:24:27,050
♪ loves my cock ♪
518
00:24:27,052 --> 00:24:29,553
Come on, girls,
unleash your inner whores.
519
00:24:29,555 --> 00:24:32,489
I know they're in there.
Come on. Like this.
520
00:24:32,491 --> 00:24:34,825
Come on, roll your hips.
You know--
521
00:24:34,827 --> 00:24:36,092
Did you put something in my drink?
522
00:24:36,094 --> 00:24:37,294
Well, if I did,
I got some in mine, too.
523
00:24:37,296 --> 00:24:38,428
That's for sure.
524
00:24:38,430 --> 00:24:41,031
The pole, right.
Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh.
525
00:24:41,033 --> 00:24:42,499
Come on, tall boy.
526
00:24:42,501 --> 00:24:45,436
Uh...Oh!
527
00:24:46,439 --> 00:24:48,739
Yes.
528
00:24:48,741 --> 00:24:51,375
Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
529
00:24:51,377 --> 00:24:53,144
- All right, all right.
- Hey!
530
00:24:53,146 --> 00:24:55,179
Hey.
Hey! What are you doing?
531
00:24:55,181 --> 00:24:57,281
What the fuck?
532
00:24:57,283 --> 00:25:00,384
Hey! Hey, hey! Ow!
533
00:25:00,386 --> 00:25:03,620
- Get out! Get out!
- Hey!
534
00:25:06,057 --> 00:25:07,723
You come to my home?
535
00:25:07,725 --> 00:25:11,694
You lay hands on my woman?
How fucking dare you?
536
00:25:11,696 --> 00:25:13,996
You psycho slut from hell!
537
00:25:13,998 --> 00:25:15,631
Batesy, Batesy!
She's with me!
538
00:25:15,633 --> 00:25:18,767
This is my girlfriend.
539
00:25:18,769 --> 00:25:20,202
Holly.
540
00:25:37,453 --> 00:25:40,454
It's nice to meet you, Holly.
541
00:25:40,456 --> 00:25:44,358
I'll be upstairs.
542
00:25:47,128 --> 00:25:48,128
How can I help?
543
00:25:48,130 --> 00:25:49,195
You can take your tramp,
544
00:25:49,197 --> 00:25:51,765
and you can get the fuck
out of my house!
545
00:25:51,767 --> 00:25:52,932
Oh! Who's she calling
a tramp, huh?
546
00:25:52,934 --> 00:25:54,367
Pretty sure she means you.
547
00:25:54,369 --> 00:25:56,069
This is all your fault.
548
00:25:56,071 --> 00:25:58,905
Everything you fucking touch
turns to shit!
549
00:25:58,907 --> 00:26:00,441
I know this is probably
none of my business,
550
00:26:00,443 --> 00:26:02,076
but I don't think
this is Hank's fault.
551
00:26:02,078 --> 00:26:03,077
- Shut up!
- Shut up!
552
00:26:03,079 --> 00:26:04,412
Shutting up.
553
00:26:04,414 --> 00:26:05,880
Oh, no, no.
It is my fault.
554
00:26:05,882 --> 00:26:08,116
It's always my fault.
555
00:26:08,118 --> 00:26:11,520
How can I be of service?
556
00:26:11,522 --> 00:26:13,588
All right.
Let's go, tramp.
557
00:26:13,590 --> 00:26:15,022
I'll get you that screenplay, Hank.
558
00:26:15,024 --> 00:26:16,323
Yeah, can't wait.
559
00:26:16,325 --> 00:26:18,158
Becca, let this be a lesson to you.
560
00:26:18,160 --> 00:26:19,526
Stay off the pole.
561
00:26:19,528 --> 00:26:22,963
You think this is funny?
Do you see anyone laughing?
562
00:26:22,965 --> 00:26:24,464
I'm so sick and tired of you
showing up out of nowhere
563
00:26:24,466 --> 00:26:27,367
and fucking with our lives.
564
00:26:27,369 --> 00:26:29,035
Like somehow you know better.
565
00:26:29,037 --> 00:26:32,105
You make a mess,
and then you waltz off,
566
00:26:32,107 --> 00:26:33,873
like you've done something noble.
567
00:26:33,875 --> 00:26:37,744
But we have to clean up after you!
568
00:26:37,746 --> 00:26:40,213
Let this be a lesson to you, dad.
569
00:26:40,215 --> 00:26:44,117
Stay the fuck away.
570
00:26:44,119 --> 00:26:47,954
I like you much better
when you're in New York.
571
00:26:47,956 --> 00:26:51,124
Whoo! Chick's got
fuckin' balls, huh?
572
00:26:51,126 --> 00:26:53,193
Thanks for the hospitality, bitches!
573
00:26:53,195 --> 00:26:57,497
Mm-hmm.
574
00:26:57,499 --> 00:27:00,333
You all right?
575
00:27:00,335 --> 00:27:03,470
Wanna get a drink?
576
00:27:03,472 --> 00:27:04,937
Sure, why not?
577
00:27:04,939 --> 00:27:06,372
Cool, let's hit the 'bow.
578
00:27:06,374 --> 00:27:08,274
- The rainbow?
- Mm-hmm.
579
00:27:08,276 --> 00:27:10,709
I went there once with a guy
named Lew Ashby.
580
00:27:10,711 --> 00:27:11,710
You ever heard of him?
581
00:27:11,712 --> 00:27:13,212
Hear of him?
582
00:27:13,214 --> 00:27:17,150
Sucked his dick more times
than I can count.
583
00:27:17,152 --> 00:27:19,720
Ooh!
584
00:27:19,722 --> 00:27:23,358
You have a Porsche, huh?
585
00:27:23,360 --> 00:27:26,261
Very, very hot.
That makes mama wet.
586
00:27:26,263 --> 00:27:29,332
Holy shit, this is my favorite song!
587
00:27:29,334 --> 00:27:30,966
Check it out.
Watch this.
588
00:27:33,972 --> 00:27:36,940
♪ And here I go again on my own ♪
589
00:27:36,942 --> 00:27:42,179
♪ going down the only road
I've ever known ♪
590
00:27:42,181 --> 00:27:44,415
♪ like a drifter I was born ♪
591
00:27:44,417 --> 00:27:48,752
♪ to walk alone ♪
592
00:27:48,754 --> 00:27:53,824
♪ and I've made up my mind ♪
593
00:27:53,826 --> 00:27:56,467
♪ I ain't wasting no more time ♪
594
00:27:56,587 --> 00:28:06,903
Sync & corrections by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com