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Previously on Californication...
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The Miss's caught me eating
one of her chocolate bars
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out of the cleaning lady's vagina.
Hello, darling.
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You fucking fuckface!
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I would like you to meet
the poet and philosopher...
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- Holy shit, that's Marilyn Manson
- Marilyn Manson.
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We are talking about doing
a duet together.
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Maybe tour of the States.
That would be really something, right?
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I'm just here for the narcotics.
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- We're getting married!!
- The Runkles!
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I'll fucking marry you Fuckers
on stage at the Greek!
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Fuck Yeah, why not?
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- You guys are coming on Tour, Right?
- What?
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We gotta keep writing this musical.
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If we are not together, I don't expect you
to have taken some vow of celibacy.
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Karen, you want me not to see
anybody else, just say the word.
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I decided to go abroad, for an
indeterminate amount of time.
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I want to make a
literary pilgrimage.
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Watching her go, I don't know...
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It kinda feels like
the end of something.
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Makes you wonder if she was the only thing
that was still keeping us together.
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How can you even debate this shit?
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Go. Hit the road, don't look
back, you fucking idiot.
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Right, what if...
What if...
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You've lived your entire adult life
according to "what if".
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What if the one you think is "the
one" is not really "the one"?
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What if you shut your fucking piehole
and pour me another drink?
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You came to see me.
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Yeah, but I can't help
where my dreams take me.
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Yeah, but what do you dream
about when you get there?
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That says a lot.
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What the fuck is wrong with that ass?
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Nothing.
She's pretty amazing.
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In some way, she's perfect for me.
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The eternal dilemma, isn't it?
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"Home, sweet home" vs. "the wild
cold world outside your door".
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You know which way you chosen,
you died to regret it.
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Says who?
It's not even me talking.
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You know that.
I just ask the questions.
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Why are you so afraid
to give up and let go?
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It's ok, Hank.
We tried and we failed.
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It's not the end of the world.
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But, if I gave up on us,
what would I have left?
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The rest of your life.
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Hank.
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You OK?
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Just a wet dream
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Why on earth are you packing so early?
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Well, first of all, it's noon
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And second, I'm still leaving
after the show tonight
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Which brings us to the real question
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Should I be packing for two?
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Cause I'm pretty sure
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I could fit in a multitude of
black T-shirts and jeans and...
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Or I could be possibly
persuaded to come back to bed
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And postpone packing
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Be more persuasive
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Are you pushing my head now?
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- Oh my god!
- Just a little bit.
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www.addic7ed.com
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www.addic7ed.com
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And... I'm hard!
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Thanks, Hanky.
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Let me check..
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You're a liar.
And I love you for it.
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That's hardly appropriate.
Sorry, naughty smurf.
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She's not married yet.
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Are you sure you wanna
go through with this?
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- Why are you trying to talk her out of it?
- Yeah, why you be trying to talk me out of it?
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Charlie and Marcy Runkle are the
Fred and Ethel Mertz of our time
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They belongs together.
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That's right.
And if you'll excuse me,
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Ethel has to make yellow while Lucy and
Ricky discuss their issues and what not.
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So I've... I've a chance to
go with Atticus on the road.
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- Yeah?
- And I thought maybe...
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You would wanna talk about it,
talk, I don't know.
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I shouldn't even factor into your decision
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But you do, you always do.
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Well... Hank, what do
you want me to do?
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I mean... to say:
"Oh, please, stay!"
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Let's live happily ever after
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I can't do that.
Do you want my permission?
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I mean, you're a big boy. You're gonna make
your own decision about it, anyways.
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Besides, I... I thought you're in a
relationship with someone.
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Well, maybe that's what's
good for you then,
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like a non-relationship relationship.
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Cause you have a hard time functioning
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within the confines of a traditional one.
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Well, it was never anything
traditional about us
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Have you heard from our
literary pilgrim?
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No, only what she puts up on Instagram.
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What's Instagram?
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Ok, you guys working shit out?
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You back together?
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I guess not.
Ok, here's the deal:
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Me and CW Runks are gonna do this thing.
And do you know why?
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- No, why?
- Because we're gonna be fucking happy.
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- And you know why?
- Why?
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Because it's better than being
fucking miserable all the time.
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This whole time we've been out here
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it's been like a midlife crisis roller coaster ride.
And it's fucking over!
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Now. So let's all just
live happily ever after.
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Ok? Good?
It's settled?
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Good!
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What's going on?
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Atticus's had to sell the
plane to fund the tour
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And the record company ain't giving him
the kind of support they used to.
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And no thanks to that nutjob missus of his,
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he's having some serious
cash flow problems.
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We're back to touring by bus.
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- Where is that fucking ginger?
- He's in the bedroom.
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He wants to talk with someone
who understands
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what it's like to live with heartbreak
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I told him, you know,
I've got lots of experience,
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but no, he doesn't care, he wants you.
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Hey Atticus!
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What's up rock star?
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I can't play the gig tonight, Hank.
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Why is that?
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I went home this morning,
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and got down on bended knee,
and asked Natalie to take me back.
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And she told me to fuck off.
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She's really done with me,
which is understandable
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given my behavior.
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But I've never done an opening night
without a good luck kiss from her.
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Back in the early day, she used to give me this really
comprehensive blow job, like balls and all, you know?
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Although, I was usually too wired to come.
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That's a cute story, buddy.
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But I'm afraid the big rock show must go on
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But I haven't been on a bus
in well over 10 years.
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It's so embarrassingly bargain basement.
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Are you kidding? That bus
out there, that's beautiful. That bus.
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- Really, you like it?
- Yes, I love it. It's bad ass.
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- It's cool?
- It's so cool.
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It's like a land airplane
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It's gas friendly, eco-friendly
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You'll probably get an award for that shit.
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- How do you do it, Hank?
- Do what?
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The woman that you love is out there
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and you know you can't have her.
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How do you even get up in the morning?
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Booze is always helpful
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So is the art.
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Everything that I write
is either for her, or about her, so
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I'm with her, even when I'm not,
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in my writing.
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That's very moving, Hank.
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- Don't cry!
- Why?
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It's unbecoming.
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You said something moving,
why shouldn't I cry?
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What about your aussie blockiness?
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Or your British stiff upper lip.
Whatever the fuck you are.
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I think you should come
on tour with me, Hank.
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I feel like if we finish our
master piece,
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our rock opera about love,
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maybe we'll both end up with the girl
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I'll think about it.
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In the meantime.
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Are you ready to rock out,
or do you cock out?
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I'll admit this is pretty cool.
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It's like Disneyland every day
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Yeah. Without the morbidly obese
running around in scooters
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Even the concept of time
is different, you know,
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it's rock and roll fucking
summer camp forever.
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- It's got to end at some point, doesn't it?
- Says who?
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All roads lead back home eventually
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Sounds like a Country song
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Hey. You're Faith, right?
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Yeah, that's me.
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I'm Vince, from Mysstery.
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Two s's. We're opening the show tonight
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Well... Hey, Vince from Mistery
with to s's
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- Good luck up there.
- Cool, thanks.
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00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:17,067
I'm wondering if maybe you
want to come hang on our bus
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It's the one that says
"Cat Club"
176
00:10:19,055 --> 00:10:21,902
We call it that because
chicks who want to come on
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we ask them to pee on this
litter box we keep by the front door
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This way we know for sure that
they're willing to party
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I'm free, I got a full bladder.
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I don't think you'd have
to do that, though
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because you're pretty famous
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00:10:34,830 --> 00:10:37,790
Thanks for the preferential
treatment and all, no thanks
183
00:10:37,791 --> 00:10:40,882
What? We're not big enough
for the legendary Faith?
184
00:10:40,883 --> 00:10:42,664
No, no, it's not like that at all
185
00:10:42,665 --> 00:10:45,473
But if you're gonna be a dick about it,
I can just come clean
186
00:10:45,474 --> 00:10:46,874
You're just not really that talented
187
00:10:46,875 --> 00:10:49,404
I've heard your album
and it's really shitty mall metal
188
00:10:49,405 --> 00:10:51,556
So, if I were you, I would
just quit now
189
00:10:51,557 --> 00:10:53,877
and maybe Hot Topic will hire
you back this summer
190
00:10:53,878 --> 00:10:56,213
Wow, you're kind of a bitch!
191
00:10:56,214 --> 00:10:59,452
Hey, watch your manners, son.
That's no way to talk to a lady.
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00:10:59,453 --> 00:11:01,524
Fuck off, dad.
193
00:11:01,525 --> 00:11:03,273
You know what this calls for?
194
00:11:03,274 --> 00:11:04,736
Titty twister!
195
00:11:25,394 --> 00:11:27,953
Good evening, Los Angeles!
196
00:11:27,954 --> 00:11:29,921
You wanted the best?
197
00:11:29,922 --> 00:11:33,769
Well I got stuck in the traffic
coming on the fucking hill.
198
00:11:33,770 --> 00:11:36,329
From London, England,
by way of Mars
199
00:11:36,330 --> 00:11:38,697
The Bacardi Concert series presents:
200
00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:41,626
Atticus Fucking-Fetch!
201
00:12:07,581 --> 00:12:11,265
Good luck out there.
Not that you need it.
202
00:12:11,266 --> 00:12:14,450
You're a fucking rock star
203
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:24,549
A long way from church, eh?
204
00:13:24,550 --> 00:13:26,590
Are you kidding me?
205
00:13:53,428 --> 00:13:56,647
Do you, bald fucking wanker,
206
00:13:56,648 --> 00:14:00,366
take this sexy little tree stump
207
00:14:00,367 --> 00:14:03,767
to be your immortal beloved?
208
00:14:03,768 --> 00:14:06,444
I most certainly do.
209
00:14:06,445 --> 00:14:08,125
Do!
210
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,836
Right.
And do you,
211
00:14:11,837 --> 00:14:13,757
delicious little spinner
212
00:14:13,758 --> 00:14:16,093
with whom I have shared
a sexual encounter
213
00:14:16,094 --> 00:14:19,534
which will sustain me
well into my golden years,
214
00:14:19,535 --> 00:14:21,652
take this...
215
00:14:21,653 --> 00:14:24,642
sweaty hairless pinhead
216
00:14:24,643 --> 00:14:28,854
to be the very last
sexual parter of you entire life?
217
00:14:28,855 --> 00:14:30,798
Jesus!...
218
00:14:32,809 --> 00:14:35,167
Well, when you put it like that...
219
00:14:36,063 --> 00:14:38,847
Let's do(ce) it.
I do(ce) it.
220
00:14:44,632 --> 00:14:47,712
Good.
Let's get on with it.
221
00:14:52,108 --> 00:14:53,559
By the power vested on me
222
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,999
by the Sun Kill Moon ministry
of Northern California
223
00:14:57,000 --> 00:15:00,016
I now pronounce you wife
and man
224
00:15:09,893 --> 00:15:13,204
Now, while we're here,
does anyone else feel like getting wedded
225
00:15:13,205 --> 00:15:17,097
on this glorious, glorious LA evening?
226
00:15:17,098 --> 00:15:20,591
Anyone?
227
00:15:21,689 --> 00:15:24,159
Anyone?
228
00:15:24,160 --> 00:15:25,717
Karen
229
00:15:35,231 --> 00:15:37,902
Karen, be with me.
230
00:15:37,903 --> 00:15:39,942
Spend the rest of your life
with this fool,
231
00:15:39,943 --> 00:15:44,806
and this fool will spend the rest of
his life making sure you don't regret it
232
00:15:46,016 --> 00:15:48,052
What do you say, babe?
233
00:15:48,053 --> 00:15:51,230
- Say Yes!
- Will you be my wife?
234
00:15:51,231 --> 00:15:53,807
Come on!
Say yes!
235
00:15:58,348 --> 00:16:00,782
No?
Nobody?
236
00:16:01,405 --> 00:16:02,955
Really?
237
00:16:04,888 --> 00:16:10,134
No? Then get the fuck off my stage.
Be gone, all of you!
238
00:16:14,284 --> 00:16:16,917
I wrote this next song
for my wife, Natalie
239
00:16:16,918 --> 00:16:20,189
in hope that she'll forgive me
240
00:16:20,190 --> 00:16:23,362
although if she did, I'll probably
just bugger it up all over again
241
00:16:24,414 --> 00:16:27,858
But tonight I'm gonna play it
for my good friend and collaborator
242
00:16:27,859 --> 00:16:32,399
Hank Moody. Who knows a thing
or two about heart break himself
243
00:17:26,042 --> 00:17:29,497
- Wait, you look familiar.
- Hank Moody
244
00:17:29,498 --> 00:17:30,898
- Come on
- Manson
245
00:17:30,899 --> 00:17:33,460
Thank you for coming to
my fucking mother show
246
00:17:33,461 --> 00:17:34,955
Hi, Brian.
247
00:17:35,356 --> 00:17:37,504
Actually, I'm surprised that you came
248
00:17:37,505 --> 00:17:40,239
I just want to make it clear,
I was just fucking with you.
249
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,129
I would not give drugs to your daughter.
250
00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:45,067
Because I need them for later.
251
00:17:45,068 --> 00:17:46,545
But wait. How is the kid?
252
00:17:46,546 --> 00:17:48,294
- She's great.
- Good, good.
253
00:17:48,295 --> 00:17:50,795
Would you get her to send me the
picture of me tea-bagging Atticus?
254
00:17:50,796 --> 00:17:52,907
- Will do
- Because I want to put that on my Facebook
255
00:17:52,908 --> 00:17:54,396
Will do
256
00:17:55,373 --> 00:17:58,254
And if you guys aren't together
I would pee in your butt
257
00:17:58,255 --> 00:18:00,094
What?!
258
00:18:01,426 --> 00:18:03,746
It's Becca.
259
00:18:03,747 --> 00:18:06,418
- Hey sweetie
- Hi, dad
260
00:18:06,419 --> 00:18:10,285
- How's the road treating you?
- It's so beautiful out here, dad.
261
00:18:10,286 --> 00:18:12,430
I'm having the time of my life
262
00:18:12,431 --> 00:18:16,566
- And tomorrow we leave for Europe
- Glad to hear it
263
00:18:16,967 --> 00:18:22,526
- Are you happy, Dad?
- That's a loaded question
264
00:18:22,527 --> 00:18:25,767
I was just thinking about
what I want for all the people in my life
265
00:18:25,768 --> 00:18:29,002
And I realized that I just
wanted you to be happy
266
00:18:29,003 --> 00:18:31,997
I want to see you smile
and know you mean it
267
00:18:33,583 --> 00:18:36,812
- are you high right now?
- Significantly
268
00:18:36,813 --> 00:18:39,027
We just smoked some killer weed.
269
00:18:39,028 --> 00:18:40,428
Of course you did
270
00:18:41,498 --> 00:18:44,029
Be careful
271
00:18:44,030 --> 00:18:47,658
And have fun, just not too much
272
00:18:47,659 --> 00:18:49,059
Don't worry, dad
273
00:18:49,060 --> 00:18:51,225
All roads lead back home
274
00:18:51,226 --> 00:18:53,776
That sounds like a Country song
275
00:18:54,661 --> 00:18:58,403
- I love you, dad
- I love you too, sweetie
276
00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:01,651
Would you do me a favor and
send Manson
277
00:19:01,652 --> 00:19:04,184
that photo of him tea-bagging Atticus
278
00:19:04,185 --> 00:19:06,434
Ok, will do
279
00:19:06,435 --> 00:19:08,607
Ok, sweetie, I love you
280
00:19:19,816 --> 00:19:21,473
I'm coming with you
281
00:19:25,711 --> 00:19:29,416
That makes me so very happy
282
00:20:12,681 --> 00:20:16,090
Good for you, man.
You made the right decision
283
00:20:16,091 --> 00:20:19,077
Besides, even if you actually had the balls
to do it, and she actually said yes
284
00:20:19,078 --> 00:20:22,617
- what would you have done?
- I would've married her right then and there.
285
00:20:23,018 --> 00:20:25,399
And then, what? You would have fucked
like rabbits for a couple days,
286
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:27,693
you would have had some sweet little
pillow talk, and then one day she would
287
00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:30,844
ask you to go to Home Depot with her.
Party is over
288
00:20:31,245 --> 00:20:33,952
You know, you talk a good game,
but I was with you when you died
289
00:20:33,953 --> 00:20:37,960
and you were about to do it. You were gonna take
one last shot at the love of your life, buddy.
290
00:20:37,961 --> 00:20:41,268
Sure, I would have given it a try. Maybe I
could even got her back in the sack again.
291
00:20:41,269 --> 00:20:43,519
But eventually, you get out of bed.
292
00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:48,268
You're still you. All the problems
you've ever had, they're still there.
293
00:20:48,269 --> 00:20:49,957
So you're just supposed to give up?
294
00:20:49,958 --> 00:20:52,117
It's not about giving up.
It's about letting go.
295
00:20:52,118 --> 00:20:54,870
Finally accepting who you are.
296
00:20:56,007 --> 00:20:57,646
Guess who
297
00:21:00,578 --> 00:21:03,431
God, I can't wait for her to die
and come down
298
00:21:08,038 --> 00:21:09,590
Karen?
299
00:21:12,625 --> 00:21:14,098
Karen!
300
00:21:27,234 --> 00:21:29,771
You have to go, don't you?
301
00:21:30,998 --> 00:21:32,829
Yeah, I do.
302
00:21:34,158 --> 00:21:36,317
I'm sorry, I do.
303
00:21:40,038 --> 00:21:41,554
Don't be.
304
00:21:50,517 --> 00:21:53,150
You just don't know what you're
gonna be missing.
305
00:21:53,151 --> 00:21:54,554
I do.
306
00:21:54,955 --> 00:21:56,955
That's what makes it is so hard.
307
00:22:01,100 --> 00:22:03,769
- I could love you, you know.
- Faith...
308
00:22:03,770 --> 00:22:08,208
I'm... I'm not saying that I do.
309
00:22:09,434 --> 00:22:13,202
I'm saying that I could.
310
00:22:14,144 --> 00:22:18,475
Which is rare for me,
and deserves to be acknowledged
311
00:22:19,491 --> 00:22:24,562
You understand me, better than
any guy I've ever met
312
00:22:25,435 --> 00:22:27,261
You get me.
313
00:22:28,886 --> 00:22:34,093
And that has been the nicest feeling
314
00:22:37,898 --> 00:22:39,362
I'm just saying.
315
00:22:39,363 --> 00:22:42,936
And I'm just saying that you're
pretty fucking amazing.
316
00:22:43,337 --> 00:22:46,639
And I hope you find what
you're looking for out here.
317
00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:49,671
I hope you find what you're
looking for out back there
318
00:22:51,356 --> 00:22:53,923
I'll even say a prayer for you.
319
00:22:53,924 --> 00:22:57,826
Just not a very big one
320
00:22:59,511 --> 00:23:03,527
- I hate saying goodbye to you
- Then don't
321
00:23:04,541 --> 00:23:06,181
You know what?
322
00:23:06,582 --> 00:23:10,838
The great thing about
never really being together:
323
00:23:10,839 --> 00:23:13,586
never really have to break up
324
00:23:14,917 --> 00:23:18,390
Hank, get the fuck out of here
325
00:23:18,391 --> 00:23:22,473
Before I wrap my legs around you
and convince you to stay.
326
00:23:22,474 --> 00:23:25,051
And you know I can do it.
327
00:23:53,816 --> 00:23:55,278
What is this? Wow what?
328
00:23:58,079 --> 00:24:00,608
- What's going on?
- Hank's got to go
329
00:24:00,609 --> 00:24:02,872
He's got to see a horse about a girl
330
00:24:02,873 --> 00:24:06,027
Is this about following your bliss?
331
00:24:06,912 --> 00:24:09,291
That what we were talking
about in bed yesterday?
332
00:24:09,292 --> 00:24:12,727
- Is it about love?
- It is
333
00:24:12,728 --> 00:24:14,259
Then you must go.
334
00:24:15,429 --> 00:24:17,135
I can't turn the bus around,
335
00:24:17,136 --> 00:24:19,380
but I can send an emissary.
336
00:24:28,713 --> 00:24:30,683
Sorry, crying again.
337
00:24:30,684 --> 00:24:33,068
Don't be sorry. It's unbecoming.
338
00:24:36,015 --> 00:24:41,302
All right, you. Go. My work here is done.
339
00:24:44,303 --> 00:24:47,455
I really see to you happily ever after
340
00:25:44,137 --> 00:25:46,388
I know he means a great deal to you,
341
00:25:46,389 --> 00:25:48,577
as he does to me.
342
00:25:48,578 --> 00:25:53,281
And I just want you to know that
I'm here for you, if you need me
343
00:25:53,282 --> 00:25:55,768
Emotionally,
344
00:25:55,769 --> 00:25:57,594
spiritually,
345
00:25:57,595 --> 00:25:59,960
and obviously sexually.
346
00:26:01,559 --> 00:26:03,288
Thank you, Atticus
347
00:26:03,289 --> 00:26:04,700
I'm serious, darling.
348
00:26:04,701 --> 00:26:07,878
Sometimes and orgasm can
relieve heartache
349
00:26:07,879 --> 00:26:10,082
I've done a lot of research
in the area
350
00:26:10,083 --> 00:26:13,429
Can I at least get a good luck kiss?
I do have a gig tonight, you know.
351
00:26:13,430 --> 00:26:15,543
I'm a bit nervous
352
00:26:58,252 --> 00:27:01,178
I know you're not one for
emoting, Krull,
353
00:27:01,179 --> 00:27:02,609
but thank you
354
00:27:02,610 --> 00:27:04,462
I had a girl once
355
00:27:04,463 --> 00:27:06,423
love of my life she was
356
00:27:06,424 --> 00:27:09,490
Fucked it up, of course.
357
00:27:09,491 --> 00:27:11,659
I thought there'd be time.
358
00:27:11,660 --> 00:27:14,357
Turns out, it's just roads
359
00:27:14,358 --> 00:27:17,715
Long and paved potholes
360
00:27:17,716 --> 00:27:20,001
I read that once in a book.
361
00:27:20,696 --> 00:27:22,945
Go and get her, pal
362
00:27:37,426 --> 00:27:42,154
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