1
00:00:01,177 --> 00:00:03,762
You know, I've been thinking
about timetravel again.

2
00:00:03,974 --> 00:00:06,521
Why? Did you hit a roadblock
with invisibility?

3
00:00:08,016 --> 00:00:09,376
Put it on a backburner.

4
00:00:10,389 --> 00:00:11,740
Anyway.
It occurs to me,

5
00:00:11,933 --> 00:00:13,649
If I have ever did
perfect time machine,

6
00:00:13,842 --> 00:00:15,810
I'd just go into the past
and give it to myself.

7
00:00:16,080 --> 00:00:19,379
That's eliminating the need for me
to invent it in the first place.

8
00:00:20,201 --> 00:00:21,223
Interesting.

9
00:00:21,414 --> 00:00:23,633
Yeah, it really kicks the pressure off.

10
00:00:24,596 --> 00:00:25,880
Sounds like a breakthrough.

11
00:00:26,053 --> 00:00:28,388
Should I call Science Magazine
and tell them to hold the cover?

12
00:00:28,859 --> 00:00:30,824
It's time travel,
I will have already done that.

13
00:00:32,988 --> 00:00:34,745
Then I guess congratulations
are in order.

14
00:00:35,292 --> 00:00:37,877
No, congratulations will
have been in order.

15
00:00:39,222 --> 00:00:41,205
You know, I am not going
to enjoy this party.

16
00:00:41,360 --> 00:00:43,170
I know,
I'm familiar with you.

17
00:00:43,705 --> 00:00:46,438
The last department party,
Professor Finkleday cornered me

18
00:00:46,592 --> 00:00:48,869
and talked about
spelunking for 45 minutes.

19
00:00:49,065 --> 00:00:50,128
Yes, I was there.

20
00:00:50,283 --> 00:00:52,150
You know what's interesting
about caves?

21
00:00:52,310 --> 00:00:53,693
- What?
- Nothing.

22
00:00:55,787 --> 00:00:58,130
Then we'll avoid him,
we'll meet the new department head,

23
00:00:58,265 --> 00:00:59,957
congratulate him,
shake his hand and go.

24
00:01:00,116 --> 00:01:02,804
How's this?
"Pleased to meet you, Dr. Gablehauser.

25
00:01:03,076 --> 00:01:04,889
"How fortunate for you
that the university's

26
00:01:05,026 --> 00:01:06,623
"chosen to hire you,
despite the fact

27
00:01:06,758 --> 00:01:08,986
"that you've done no original
research in 25 years,

28
00:01:09,121 --> 00:01:11,168
"and instead have written
a series of popular books

29
00:01:11,304 --> 00:01:13,040
"that reduce
the great concepts of science

30
00:01:13,177 --> 00:01:14,428
"to a series of anecdotes,

31
00:01:14,602 --> 00:01:16,815
"each one dumbed down
to accommodate the duration

32
00:01:17,008 --> 00:01:18,896
"of an average bowel movement.

33
00:01:20,333 --> 00:01:21,333
Mahalo."

34
00:01:25,095 --> 00:01:27,089
"Mahalo's" a nice touch.

35
00:01:28,208 --> 00:01:30,523
You know there only eight consonants
in Hawaiian language?

36
00:01:30,658 --> 00:01:32,761
Interesting.
You should lead with that.

37
00:01:35,343 --> 00:01:37,302
Oh, God, look at this buffet.

38
00:01:38,064 --> 00:01:39,316
I love America.

39
00:01:39,811 --> 00:01:41,241
You don't have buffets in India?

40
00:01:41,438 --> 00:01:43,713
Of course,
but it's all Indian food.

41
00:01:44,605 --> 00:01:47,132
You can't find a bagel
in Mumbai to save your life.

42
00:01:47,473 --> 00:01:48,473
Shmear me.

43
00:01:50,893 --> 00:01:53,652
- Here's an interesting turn of events.
- What?

44
00:01:56,134 --> 00:01:57,330
Howard brought a date?

45
00:01:57,458 --> 00:01:58,995
A more plausible explanation is that

46
00:01:59,169 --> 00:02:00,519
his work in robotics has made

47
00:02:00,683 --> 00:02:02,169
an amazing leap forward.

48
00:02:03,109 --> 00:02:05,159
Hey, what up,
science bitches?

49
00:02:07,478 --> 00:02:08,558
May I introduce my

50
00:02:08,712 --> 00:02:10,294
special lady friend Summer?

51
00:02:10,582 --> 00:02:13,185
- I told you touching's extra.
- Right. Sorry.

52
00:02:14,995 --> 00:02:17,432
Here comes our new boss.
Be polite.

53
00:02:17,785 --> 00:02:20,134
Hi, fellas.
Eric Gablehauser.

54
00:02:20,355 --> 00:02:21,411
Howard Wolowitz.

55
00:02:22,299 --> 00:02:23,841
Nice to meet you.
And you are?

56
00:02:24,847 --> 00:02:26,733
An actualrealscientist.

57
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:31,498
How was that?

58
00:02:33,314 --> 00:02:35,282
I can't believe he fired me.

59
00:02:36,147 --> 00:02:38,731
Well, you did call him
a glorified high school science teacher

60
00:02:38,904 --> 00:02:42,085
whose last successful experiment
was lighting his own farts.

61
00:02:43,643 --> 00:02:44,666
In my defense,

62
00:02:44,858 --> 00:02:47,269
I prefaced that by saying,
"With all due respect."

63
00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:10,408
Synchro: Sixe

64
00:03:13,916 --> 00:03:14,916
Morning.

65
00:03:15,270 --> 00:03:16,270
Morning.

66
00:03:16,821 --> 00:03:18,617
You're making eggs for breakfast?

67
00:03:18,873 --> 00:03:21,325
This isn't breakfast,
it's an experiment.

68
00:03:23,516 --> 00:03:25,291
'Cause it looks a lot like breakfast.

69
00:03:25,814 --> 00:03:27,866
I finally have time
to test my hypothesis

70
00:03:28,063 --> 00:03:29,858
about the separation
of the water molecules

71
00:03:30,040 --> 00:03:32,953
from the egg proteins and its
impact vis-a-vis taste.

72
00:03:34,699 --> 00:03:35,699
Sounds yummy.

73
00:03:37,000 --> 00:03:38,811
I look forward
to your work with bacon.

74
00:03:39,256 --> 00:03:40,256
As do I.

75
00:03:42,138 --> 00:03:44,087
You know, I'm sure
if you just apologize

76
00:03:44,299 --> 00:03:46,289
to Gablehauser,
he would give you your job back.

77
00:03:46,443 --> 00:03:47,659
I don't want my job back.

78
00:03:48,165 --> 00:03:49,944
I've spent the past
three and a half years

79
00:03:50,102 --> 00:03:51,949
staring at grease boards
full of equations.

80
00:03:52,145 --> 00:03:54,570
Before that, I spent four years
working on my thesis.

81
00:03:54,724 --> 00:03:56,136
Before that, I was in college,

82
00:03:56,271 --> 00:03:58,298
and before that,
I was in the fifth grade.

83
00:03:59,695 --> 00:04:03,287
This is my first day off in decades
and I'm going to savor it.

84
00:04:05,727 --> 00:04:07,715
I'll let you get back
to fixing your eggs.

85
00:04:07,998 --> 00:04:10,563
Not just fixing my eggs,
I'm fixing everyone's eggs.

86
00:04:11,401 --> 00:04:12,951
And we all thank you.

87
00:04:44,523 --> 00:04:46,375
Use new eggs.

88
00:04:50,943 --> 00:04:52,988
I'm running out to the market.
You need anything?

89
00:04:54,146 --> 00:04:55,880
This would be
one of those circumstances

90
00:04:56,028 --> 00:04:59,416
that people unfamiliar with the law of
large numbers would call a coincidence.

91
00:05:00,076 --> 00:05:01,581
- I'm sorry?
- I need eggs.

92
00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:03,136
Four dozen should suffice.

93
00:05:03,389 --> 00:05:04,502
- Four dozen?
- Yes,

94
00:05:04,652 --> 00:05:06,498
and evenly distributed
amongst brown, white,

95
00:05:06,653 --> 00:05:09,046
free-range, large,
extra large and jumbo.

96
00:05:09,915 --> 00:05:10,996
Okay, one more time.

97
00:05:11,247 --> 00:05:13,067
Never mind.
You won't get it right.

98
00:05:13,590 --> 00:05:15,114
I'd better come with you.

99
00:05:22,002 --> 00:05:24,182
How come you didn't
go into work today?

100
00:05:24,308 --> 00:05:25,627
I'm taking a sabbatical

101
00:05:25,781 --> 00:05:28,252
because I won't kowtow
to mediocre minds.

102
00:05:28,913 --> 00:05:30,568
So you got canned, huh?

103
00:05:31,112 --> 00:05:33,659
Theoretical physicists
do not get canned...

104
00:05:34,665 --> 00:05:35,665
but yeah.

105
00:05:37,171 --> 00:05:38,483
Maybe it's all for the best.

106
00:05:38,623 --> 00:05:41,276
I always say when one door closes,
another one opens.

107
00:05:41,976 --> 00:05:43,248
No, it doesn't.

108
00:05:44,181 --> 00:05:46,450
Not unless the two doors
are connected by relays

109
00:05:46,604 --> 00:05:49,069
- or there are motion sensors involved.
- No, I meant...

110
00:05:49,204 --> 00:05:51,649
Or if the first door closing
creates a change of air pressure

111
00:05:51,784 --> 00:05:53,271
that acts upon the second door.

112
00:05:54,247 --> 00:05:55,247
Never mind.

113
00:05:56,966 --> 00:05:58,590
Slow down.

114
00:05:58,803 --> 00:06:01,070
- Please, slow down!
- We're fine!

115
00:06:01,216 --> 00:06:03,452
You're not leaving yourself
enough space between cars.

116
00:06:03,608 --> 00:06:06,341
- Oh, sure, I am.
- No, let me do the math for you.

117
00:06:06,461 --> 00:06:08,920
This car weighs,
let's say 4,000 pounds.

118
00:06:09,194 --> 00:06:11,065
Now add 140 for me,
120 for you...

119
00:06:11,421 --> 00:06:12,589
120?

120
00:06:12,975 --> 00:06:14,466
I'm sorry. Did I insult you?

121
00:06:14,659 --> 00:06:17,155
Is your body mass
somehow tied into your self-worth?

122
00:06:17,984 --> 00:06:19,007
Well, yeah.

123
00:06:19,834 --> 00:06:20,834
Interesting.

124
00:06:20,954 --> 00:06:22,858
Anyway, that gives us
a total weight of,

125
00:06:23,013 --> 00:06:24,590
let's say 4,400 pounds.

126
00:06:24,794 --> 00:06:26,027
Let's say 4,390.

127
00:06:26,908 --> 00:06:29,763
Fine. We're traveling forward at--

128
00:06:29,936 --> 00:06:31,653
good Lord-- 51 miles an hour.

129
00:06:32,280 --> 00:06:33,669
Let's assume that your brakes

130
00:06:33,843 --> 00:06:35,466
are new
and the calipers are aligned.

131
00:06:35,666 --> 00:06:37,289
Still, by the time we come
to a stop,

132
00:06:37,409 --> 00:06:39,979
we'll be occupying the same space
as that Buick in front of us,

133
00:06:40,172 --> 00:06:42,534
an impossibility that
nature will quickly resolve

134
00:06:42,703 --> 00:06:44,005
into death, mutilation...

135
00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,496
Oh, look, they built
a new putt-putt course.

136
00:06:50,180 --> 00:06:51,317
This is great.

137
00:06:51,832 --> 00:06:52,832
Look at me.

138
00:06:52,997 --> 00:06:54,817
I'm in the real world
of ordinary people

139
00:06:55,423 --> 00:06:58,329
just living their ordinary,
colorless workaday lives.

140
00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:00,403
Thank you.

141
00:07:00,596 --> 00:07:01,675
No, thankyou.

142
00:07:02,548 --> 00:07:04,441
And thank you, ordinary person.

143
00:07:06,879 --> 00:07:09,026
You want to hear
an interesting thing about tomatoes?

144
00:07:09,304 --> 00:07:10,484
No, not really.

145
00:07:10,656 --> 00:07:13,357
Listen, didn't you say
you need some eggs?

146
00:07:13,708 --> 00:07:16,885
Yes, but anyone who knows anything
about the dynamics of bacterial growth

147
00:07:17,039 --> 00:07:20,030
knows to pick up their refrigerated food
on the way out of the supermarket.

148
00:07:20,796 --> 00:07:23,013
Okay, then maybe you should start
heading on out then.

149
00:07:24,379 --> 00:07:25,998
No, this is fun.

150
00:07:26,406 --> 00:07:29,264
Oh, the thing about tomatoes--
and I think you'll really enjoy this--

151
00:07:29,543 --> 00:07:32,929
is they're shelved with the vegetables,
but they're technically a fruit.

152
00:07:33,141 --> 00:07:34,431
- Interesting.
- Isn't it?

153
00:07:34,592 --> 00:07:36,734
No, I mean
what you find enjoyable.

154
00:07:41,399 --> 00:07:42,399
Oh, boy.

155
00:07:44,207 --> 00:07:45,207
What now?

156
00:07:46,268 --> 00:07:48,667
Well, there's some value
to taking a multivitamin,

157
00:07:48,861 --> 00:07:50,944
but the human body
can only absorb so much.

158
00:07:51,125 --> 00:07:52,395
What you're buying here

159
00:07:52,629 --> 00:07:55,233
are the ingredients
for very expensive urine.

160
00:07:56,870 --> 00:07:59,420
Well, maybe that's what
I was going for.

161
00:07:59,894 --> 00:08:01,630
Then you'll want some manganese.

162
00:08:08,533 --> 00:08:09,991
That was fun.

163
00:08:10,111 --> 00:08:12,672
Maybe tomorrow we can go
to one of those big warehouse stores.

164
00:08:12,792 --> 00:08:13,968
Oh, I don't know.

165
00:08:14,169 --> 00:08:17,831
It's going to take me a while to recover
from all the fun I had today.

166
00:08:18,853 --> 00:08:19,853
Are you sure?

167
00:08:20,046 --> 00:08:21,983
There are a lot of advantages
to buying in bulk.

168
00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:24,665
For example, I noticed
that you purchase your tampons

169
00:08:24,858 --> 00:08:26,270
one-month supply at a time.

170
00:08:28,971 --> 00:08:29,955
What?

171
00:08:30,555 --> 00:08:32,580
Think about it.
It's a product that doesn't spoil

172
00:08:32,732 --> 00:08:36,000
and you're going to be needing them
for at least the next 30 years.

173
00:08:36,729 --> 00:08:39,339
You want me to buy 30 years
worth of tampons?

174
00:08:40,143 --> 00:08:42,748
Well, 30, 35.
When did your mother go into menopause?

175
00:08:44,727 --> 00:08:46,367
I'm not talking
about this with you.

176
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:49,256
This is a natural human process,

177
00:08:49,410 --> 00:08:51,803
and we're talking about
statistically significant savings.

178
00:08:52,034 --> 00:08:55,739
Now, if you assume 15 tampons
per cycle and a 28-day cycle...

179
00:08:55,874 --> 00:08:57,398
Are you fairly regular?

180
00:09:02,568 --> 00:09:03,822
Okay, no warehouse store,

181
00:09:03,957 --> 00:09:06,080
but we're still on
for putt-putt golf, right?

182
00:09:12,295 --> 00:09:14,933
Hey, I just ran into Penny.
She seemed upset about something.

183
00:09:15,377 --> 00:09:17,441
I think it's her time of the month.

184
00:09:19,851 --> 00:09:22,282
I marked the calendar
for future reference.

185
00:09:25,661 --> 00:09:27,188
What's with the fish?

186
00:09:28,165 --> 00:09:29,615
It's an experiment.

187
00:09:31,026 --> 00:09:32,906
What happened
to your scrambled egg research?

188
00:09:33,077 --> 00:09:34,331
Oh, that was a dead end.

189
00:09:34,523 --> 00:09:37,321
Scrambled eggs are as good
as they're ever going to be.

190
00:09:37,979 --> 00:09:40,080
So... fish?

191
00:09:41,787 --> 00:09:43,715
I read an article
about Japanese scientists

192
00:09:43,877 --> 00:09:46,598
who inserted DNA from luminous
jellyfish into other animals,

193
00:09:46,865 --> 00:09:49,894
and I thought,
"Hey, fish nightlights."

194
00:09:53,448 --> 00:09:54,739
Fish nightlights?

195
00:09:55,103 --> 00:09:56,724
It's a billion-dollar idea.

196
00:09:59,257 --> 00:10:00,257
Mum's the word.

197
00:10:01,942 --> 00:10:03,427
Are you sure you don't want

198
00:10:03,562 --> 00:10:06,051
to just apologize to Gablehauser
and get your job back?

199
00:10:07,118 --> 00:10:08,585
No, I have too much to do.

200
00:10:09,968 --> 00:10:11,120
Like luminous fish.

201
00:10:12,084 --> 00:10:13,550
I'm sorry.
I didn't...

202
00:10:15,501 --> 00:10:16,774
That's just the beginning.

203
00:10:17,138 --> 00:10:18,338
I also have an idea

204
00:10:18,531 --> 00:10:21,138
for a bulk mail-order
feminine hygiene company.

205
00:10:21,343 --> 00:10:23,302
Oh, glow-in-the-dark tampons!

206
00:10:26,704 --> 00:10:28,556
Leonard, we're gonna be rich.

207
00:10:32,617 --> 00:10:34,535
Thanks for coming
on such short notice.

208
00:10:34,670 --> 00:10:37,347
- You did the right thing calling.
- I didn't know what else to do.

209
00:10:37,501 --> 00:10:40,644
He's lost all focus.
Every day he's got a new obsession.

210
00:10:47,576 --> 00:10:50,026
This is a particularly disturbing one.

211
00:10:53,039 --> 00:10:54,039
Mommy?

212
00:10:55,193 --> 00:10:56,889
Hi, baby!

213
00:11:07,455 --> 00:11:10,658
Oh, you got yourself a loom?
How nice!

214
00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:12,320
Thank you.

215
00:11:12,503 --> 00:11:14,297
Honey, why'd you get a loom?

216
00:11:15,720 --> 00:11:18,421
I was working with luminous fish,
and I thought...

217
00:11:20,926 --> 00:11:21,926
"loom."

218
00:11:24,558 --> 00:11:26,526
Mom, what are you doing here?

219
00:11:26,830 --> 00:11:28,064
Leonard called me.

220
00:11:28,576 --> 00:11:30,158
I know, but why?

221
00:11:30,623 --> 00:11:32,991
Because one of the great minds
of the 21st century

222
00:11:33,127 --> 00:11:36,368
is raising glow-in-the-dark fish
and weaving serapes.

223
00:11:37,314 --> 00:11:39,699
This is not a serape,
this is a poncho.

224
00:11:39,874 --> 00:11:41,971
A serape is open at the sides;
a poncho is closed.

225
00:11:42,100 --> 00:11:43,119
This is a poncho.

226
00:11:43,254 --> 00:11:45,993
And neither is a reason
to call someone'smother.

227
00:11:47,727 --> 00:11:49,981
Really? When was the last time
you left the house?

228
00:11:50,871 --> 00:11:52,299
I went to the market with Penny.

229
00:11:52,492 --> 00:11:53,965
That was three weeks ago.

230
00:11:54,389 --> 00:11:56,721
Well, then buckle up.
In the next four to eight days

231
00:11:56,876 --> 00:11:58,788
she's going to get very crabby.

232
00:12:01,315 --> 00:12:04,112
Sweetheart, your little friend
is concerned about you.

233
00:12:04,317 --> 00:12:06,634
Yes, well, I'm not a child--
I'm a grown man,

234
00:12:06,806 --> 00:12:08,789
capable of living my life as I see fit.

235
00:12:08,909 --> 00:12:11,946
And I certainly don't need someone
telling on me to my mother!

236
00:12:13,354 --> 00:12:14,666
Wait, where are you going?

237
00:12:14,839 --> 00:12:17,135
To my room.
And no one's allowed in!

238
00:12:19,693 --> 00:12:21,372
He gets his temper
from his daddy.

239
00:12:22,458 --> 00:12:23,538
He's got my eyes.

240
00:12:23,781 --> 00:12:24,803
I see.

241
00:12:25,224 --> 00:12:27,816
All that science stuff,
that comes from Jesus.

242
00:12:31,775 --> 00:12:34,360
- Sheldon, your mom made dinner.
- I'm not hungry!

243
00:12:35,460 --> 00:12:37,435
Don't trouble yourself.
He's stubborn.

244
00:12:37,626 --> 00:12:39,511
He may stay in there till the Rapture.

245
00:12:41,383 --> 00:12:43,134
We so sure that's abadthing?

246
00:12:43,712 --> 00:12:45,331
I tell you,
I love the boy to death,

247
00:12:45,486 --> 00:12:48,874
but he has been difficult since
he fell out of me at the K-Mart.

248
00:12:51,454 --> 00:12:52,908
Excuse me for being so bold,

249
00:12:53,070 --> 00:12:56,504
but I now see where Sheldon
gets his smoldering good looks.

250
00:12:58,403 --> 00:13:00,795
Honey, that ain't gonna work,
but you keep tryin'.

251
00:13:02,238 --> 00:13:03,413
I made chicken.

252
00:13:04,213 --> 00:13:08,154
I hope that isn't one of the animals
that you people think is magic.

253
00:13:14,258 --> 00:13:16,762
You know, we have an Indian
gentleman at our church,

254
00:13:16,974 --> 00:13:19,297
a Dr. Patel--
It's a beautiful story.

255
00:13:19,490 --> 00:13:23,909
The Lord spoke to him and moved him
to give us all 20% off on Lasik--

256
00:13:24,062 --> 00:13:25,640
You know, those that needed it.

257
00:13:26,586 --> 00:13:27,920
That is a lovely story.

258
00:13:28,490 --> 00:13:30,171
Are we gonna do anything about Sheldon?

259
00:13:30,327 --> 00:13:32,793
Oh, we will.
You have to take your time with Sheldon.

260
00:13:33,187 --> 00:13:35,406
His father, God rest his soul,
used to always say to me,

261
00:13:35,607 --> 00:13:38,347
"Mary, you have to take
your time with Sheldon."

262
00:13:39,640 --> 00:13:42,464
- Sounds like a wise man.
- Oh, not so wise.

263
00:13:42,657 --> 00:13:45,279
He once tried to fight a bobcat
for some licorice.

264
00:13:46,528 --> 00:13:48,593
So, everybody
grab a plate

265
00:13:48,867 --> 00:13:51,417
and a pretty place mat
that Shelly wove.

266
00:13:52,137 --> 00:13:54,211
Has Shelly ever freaked out
like this before?

267
00:13:54,371 --> 00:13:55,643
Oh, all the time.

268
00:13:55,913 --> 00:13:58,111
I remember one summer
when he was 13,

269
00:13:58,391 --> 00:14:00,976
he built a small nuclear
reactor in the shed

270
00:14:01,679 --> 00:14:04,876
and told everybody he was gonna provide
free electricity for the whole town.

271
00:14:05,043 --> 00:14:06,336
Well, the only problem was,

272
00:14:06,490 --> 00:14:08,979
he had no what you call
"fissionable" materials.

273
00:14:10,251 --> 00:14:12,965
Anyway, when he went on the Internets
to get some,

274
00:14:13,184 --> 00:14:16,682
a man from the government
came by and sat him down

275
00:14:16,914 --> 00:14:19,357
real gentle, and told him
it's against the law

276
00:14:19,511 --> 00:14:21,362
to have yellow-cake uranium
in a shed.

277
00:14:22,852 --> 00:14:25,148
- What happened?
- Well, poor boy had a fit.

278
00:14:25,317 --> 00:14:28,288
Locked himself in his room
and built a sonic death ray.

279
00:14:29,454 --> 00:14:30,457
A death ray?

280
00:14:30,708 --> 00:14:33,871
That's what he called it.
Didn't even slow down the neighbor kids.

281
00:14:35,447 --> 00:14:37,337
It pissed our dog off to no end.

282
00:14:39,697 --> 00:14:41,746
You know, you two
make a cute couple.

283
00:14:43,616 --> 00:14:45,471
No. We're not...
we're not-not a couple.

284
00:14:45,618 --> 00:14:46,891
We're singles. Two singles.

285
00:14:47,030 --> 00:14:50,389
Like those... individuly wrapped
slices of cheese that...

286
00:14:52,704 --> 00:14:53,907
We're friends.

287
00:14:55,445 --> 00:14:57,640
- Did I pluck a nerve there?
- Oh, yeah.

288
00:14:58,052 --> 00:14:59,904
All right, everybody,
it's time to eat.

289
00:15:01,287 --> 00:15:03,712
Oh, Lord,
we thank You for this meal

290
00:15:03,914 --> 00:15:05,516
and all of Your bounty.

291
00:15:06,607 --> 00:15:08,095
And we pray that You help Sheldon

292
00:15:08,264 --> 00:15:09,839
get back on his rocker.

293
00:15:10,975 --> 00:15:13,273
Now, after a moment
of silent meditation,

294
00:15:13,393 --> 00:15:15,444
I'm gonna end with
"In Jesus' name,"

295
00:15:15,618 --> 00:15:17,863
but you two don't feel
any obligation to join in.

296
00:15:19,681 --> 00:15:22,041
Unless, of course,
the Holy Spirit moves you.

297
00:15:32,015 --> 00:15:34,617
Oh, my God, this is the
best cobbler I've ever had.

298
00:15:34,813 --> 00:15:36,407
It was always Sheldon's favorite.

299
00:15:36,527 --> 00:15:38,510
You know what
the secret ingredient is?

300
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:40,305
- Love?
- Lard.

301
00:15:45,736 --> 00:15:47,019
Hey, look who's come...

302
00:15:47,483 --> 00:15:48,718
You'll spook him.

303
00:15:51,003 --> 00:15:53,625
He's like a baby deer.
You got to let him come to you.

304
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,129
This is ridiculous.
Damn it, Sheldon, snap out of it!

305
00:16:05,475 --> 00:16:06,566
You're a physicist--

306
00:16:06,730 --> 00:16:09,460
You belong at the university
doing research, not hiding in your room!

307
00:16:17,164 --> 00:16:18,399
You don't hunt, do you?

308
00:16:25,145 --> 00:16:27,017
Good morning, snickerdoodle.

309
00:16:28,492 --> 00:16:29,590
Morning.

310
00:16:29,871 --> 00:16:32,221
Well, that looks awful fancy.
What is that?

311
00:16:33,948 --> 00:16:35,995
It's my idea
of what DNA would look like

312
00:16:36,169 --> 00:16:37,881
in a silicon-based life-form.

313
00:16:39,610 --> 00:16:43,251
But intelligently designed
by a creator, right?

314
00:16:45,853 --> 00:16:47,014
What do you want, Mom?

315
00:16:47,523 --> 00:16:51,458
You know how your daddy used to say
that you can only fish for so long

316
00:16:51,695 --> 00:16:54,204
before you got to throw a
stick of dynamite in the water?

317
00:16:55,829 --> 00:16:57,508
Well, I'm done fishing.

318
00:16:59,469 --> 00:17:00,473
You put those on.

319
00:17:00,665 --> 00:17:02,178
- What for?
- Because you're gonna

320
00:17:02,308 --> 00:17:04,344
go down to your office,
you're gonna apologize

321
00:17:04,464 --> 00:17:06,032
to your boss
and get your job back.

322
00:17:06,519 --> 00:17:07,612
No.
I'm sorry,

323
00:17:07,766 --> 00:17:09,623
did I start that sentence
with the words,

324
00:17:09,758 --> 00:17:11,524
"If it please Your Highness"?

325
00:17:13,828 --> 00:17:16,550
I'm not going to apologize--
I didn't say anything that wasn't true.

326
00:17:16,697 --> 00:17:18,056
Now, you listen here.

327
00:17:18,235 --> 00:17:20,766
I have been telling you
since you were four years old,

328
00:17:20,924 --> 00:17:22,811
it's okay to be smarter
than everybody,

329
00:17:22,949 --> 00:17:24,667
but you can't go around
pointing it out.

330
00:17:24,956 --> 00:17:27,507
- Why not?
- Because people don't like it!

331
00:17:29,205 --> 00:17:31,849
Remember all the ass-kickings
you got from the neighbor kids?

332
00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:36,547
Now, let's get crackin'.

333
00:17:36,862 --> 00:17:39,512
Shower, shirt, shoes,
and let's shove off.

334
00:17:42,262 --> 00:17:43,981
There wouldn't have been
any ass-kickings

335
00:17:44,144 --> 00:17:46,035
if that stupid death ray
had worked.

336
00:17:50,932 --> 00:17:51,932
Problem solved.

337
00:17:53,085 --> 00:17:55,233
Really? That's impressive.

338
00:17:55,651 --> 00:17:58,410
Leonard, the Lord never gives
us more than we can handle.

339
00:17:58,949 --> 00:18:01,202
Thankfully, He blessed me
with two other children

340
00:18:01,357 --> 00:18:02,583
who are dumb as soup.

341
00:18:08,551 --> 00:18:10,566
Excuse me, Dr. Gablehauser,
are you busy?

342
00:18:10,739 --> 00:18:12,784
- Well, actually...
- Sheldon, he's just doodlin'.

343
00:18:12,939 --> 00:18:14,038
Get in here.

344
00:18:21,368 --> 00:18:23,563
Let's go, baby.
We're losing daylight.

345
00:18:28,131 --> 00:18:29,188
As you know,

346
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,005
several weeks ago
in our first encounter,

347
00:18:32,491 --> 00:18:34,294
we may have gotten off
on the wrong foot

348
00:18:34,449 --> 00:18:36,159
when I called you an idiot.

349
00:18:37,371 --> 00:18:39,866
And I just wanted to say
that I was wrong...

350
00:18:40,410 --> 00:18:41,626
to point it out.

351
00:18:44,901 --> 00:18:46,734
I'm sorry,
we haven't been introduced.

352
00:18:49,131 --> 00:18:50,229
Sheldon's mom.

353
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,653
Now, that's impossible! You must
have had him when you were a teenager.

354
00:18:53,936 --> 00:18:56,183
Oh, aren't you sweet.
His father's dead.

355
00:18:59,242 --> 00:19:00,819
- Recently?
- Long enough.

356
00:19:01,937 --> 00:19:02,996
Please.

357
00:19:04,450 --> 00:19:05,993
Sheldon, shouldn't you be working?

358
00:19:17,219 --> 00:19:18,300
Hey, how did it go?

359
00:19:19,150 --> 00:19:20,307
I got my job back.

360
00:19:20,497 --> 00:19:21,944
Really?
What happened?

361
00:19:22,925 --> 00:19:24,375
I'm not quite sure.

362
00:19:25,559 --> 00:19:27,469
It involves a part
of the human experience

363
00:19:27,604 --> 00:19:29,339
that has always eluded me.

364
00:19:30,364 --> 00:19:31,985
That narrows it down.

365
00:19:36,003 --> 00:19:37,460
I'm very proud of you honey.

366
00:19:37,653 --> 00:19:39,472
You showed a lot of courage today.

367
00:19:40,414 --> 00:19:41,454
Thanks, Mom.

368
00:19:47,903 --> 00:19:50,739
Is Dr. Gablehauser going
to be my new daddy?

369
00:19:54,137 --> 00:19:55,177
We'll see.

370
00:19:55,835 --> 00:19:56,875
Sleep tight.