1
00:00:00,476 --> 00:00:03,371
This sandwich is
an unmitigated disaster.
2
00:00:04,124 --> 00:00:07,761
I asked for turkey and roast beef
with lettuce and Swiss on whole wheat.
3
00:00:07,921 --> 00:00:10,058
- What did they give you?
- Turkey and roast beef
4
00:00:10,178 --> 00:00:12,277
with Swiss and lettuce on whole wheat.
5
00:00:18,063 --> 00:00:20,648
It's the right ingredients,
but in the wrong order.
6
00:00:21,736 --> 00:00:22,983
In a proper sandwich,
7
00:00:23,145 --> 00:00:24,906
the cheese is adjacent to the bread
8
00:00:25,026 --> 00:00:27,706
to create a moisture barrier
against the lettuce.
9
00:00:28,625 --> 00:00:31,743
They might as well have dragged
this thing through a car wash.
10
00:00:32,439 --> 00:00:35,621
- I don't believe it.
- I know. It's basic culinary science.
11
00:00:36,247 --> 00:00:38,749
Some guy is auctioning off
a miniature Time Machine prop
12
00:00:38,910 --> 00:00:41,335
from the original film,
and no one is bidding on it.
13
00:00:41,496 --> 00:00:44,255
A time machine
from the movie The Time Machine?
14
00:00:44,738 --> 00:00:47,176
No. A time machine
from Sophie's Choice.
15
00:00:47,900 --> 00:00:50,566
Boy, Sophie could have used
a time machine in that movie.
16
00:00:50,686 --> 00:00:52,452
Did you see it? It's rough.
17
00:00:54,140 --> 00:00:56,654
- That's cool.
- It's only $800?
18
00:00:56,774 --> 00:00:58,342
Yeah. And that's my bid.
19
00:00:58,462 --> 00:00:59,896
You bid $800?
20
00:01:00,057 --> 00:01:02,962
It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.
I figured it would go for thousands,
21
00:01:03,082 --> 00:01:04,983
and I just wanted to be a part of it.
22
00:01:05,144 --> 00:01:07,023
There's only 30 sec left in the auction.
23
00:01:07,143 --> 00:01:08,279
Do you have $800?
24
00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,656
Not to blow on a miniature time machine.
25
00:01:10,822 --> 00:01:13,115
Don't worry. People wait
until the last second to bid,
26
00:01:13,235 --> 00:01:15,202
and they swoop in and get it.
It's called sniping.
27
00:01:15,363 --> 00:01:16,413
15 seconds.
28
00:01:16,573 --> 00:01:18,176
Come on, snipers.
29
00:01:19,761 --> 00:01:21,266
10, 9,
30
00:01:21,870 --> 00:01:23,799
- 8...
- Where are your snipers?
31
00:01:24,166 --> 00:01:25,188
- 5...
- Snipe.
32
00:01:25,308 --> 00:01:26,331
- 4...
- Snipe.
33
00:01:26,451 --> 00:01:27,474
- 3...
- Snipe!
34
00:01:27,594 --> 00:01:28,731
- 2...
- Snipe!
35
00:01:28,851 --> 00:01:29,664
1...
36
00:01:30,819 --> 00:01:31,845
Congratulations!
37
00:01:32,005 --> 00:01:34,472
You are the proud owner
of a miniature time machine!
38
00:01:35,925 --> 00:01:37,290
You lucky duck.
39
00:01:37,719 --> 00:01:39,303
I wonder why no one else bid.
40
00:01:39,423 --> 00:01:41,893
This is a classic piece
of sci-fi movie memorabilia.
41
00:01:42,013 --> 00:01:45,357
- Yeah, I know! I still can't afford it.
- Why don't we share it?
42
00:01:45,523 --> 00:01:48,527
We'll each put in 200 bucks,
we'll take turns having it in our house.
43
00:01:48,688 --> 00:01:50,354
A time-share time machine.
44
00:01:51,945 --> 00:01:53,259
I'm in. Sheldon?
45
00:01:53,379 --> 00:01:54,535
Need you ask?
46
00:01:55,145 --> 00:01:57,678
I still don't understand
why no one else bid.
47
00:02:06,747 --> 00:02:09,203
I understand
why no one else bid.
48
00:02:11,085 --> 00:02:13,564
Episode 114: The Nerdvana Annihilation
49
00:02:15,011 --> 00:02:17,766
Transcript: swsub.com
Sync: sub-way.fr | italiansubs.net
50
00:02:37,403 --> 00:02:39,829
Did the listing actually
say "miniature"?
51
00:02:42,042 --> 00:02:43,470
I just assumed.
52
00:02:44,953 --> 00:02:48,118
Who sells a full-size
time machine for $800?
53
00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:51,908
In a Venn diagram,
that would be an individual located
54
00:02:52,028 --> 00:02:55,104
within the intersection of the sets
"No longer want my time machine"
55
00:02:55,224 --> 00:02:56,542
and "Need $800."
56
00:02:58,132 --> 00:02:59,960
It's actually a tremendous bargain.
57
00:03:00,080 --> 00:03:03,337
Even with shipping, it works out
to less than four dollars a pound.
58
00:03:04,508 --> 00:03:06,241
Cocktail shrimp are $12.50.
59
00:03:09,020 --> 00:03:10,925
How are we going to get it upstairs?
60
00:03:12,355 --> 00:03:15,113
If we take the dish off,
it might fit in the elevator.
61
00:03:15,274 --> 00:03:17,654
Yes, but the elevator
has been broken for 2 years.
62
00:03:17,774 --> 00:03:19,224
I've been meaning to ask you.
63
00:03:19,344 --> 00:03:21,621
Do you think we should
make a call about that?
64
00:03:23,241 --> 00:03:26,257
Not necessary.
I have a Master's in engineering.
65
00:03:26,377 --> 00:03:29,128
I remotely repair satellites
on a regular basis.
66
00:03:29,507 --> 00:03:32,136
I troubleshoot space shuttle payloads.
67
00:03:32,910 --> 00:03:35,342
When the Mars Rover started
pulling to the left,
68
00:03:35,462 --> 00:03:37,643
I performed a front-end alignment
69
00:03:37,763 --> 00:03:40,027
from 62 million miles away.
70
00:03:50,140 --> 00:03:51,816
No. That baby's broken.
71
00:03:54,775 --> 00:03:56,140
Come on, guys! Push!
72
00:03:56,260 --> 00:03:59,594
If I push any harder,
I'm going to give birth to my colon.
73
00:04:00,643 --> 00:04:02,557
I can't feel my fingers. Hurry up!
74
00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:05,032
It's the same amount of work
no matter how fast you go.
75
00:04:05,152 --> 00:04:06,784
- Basic physics.
- Sheldon?
76
00:04:07,410 --> 00:04:10,774
If my fingers ever work again,
I've got a job for the middle one.
77
00:04:12,463 --> 00:04:14,634
- Hey, guys.
- Hi, Penny.
78
00:04:17,594 --> 00:04:18,990
Take a break, guys.
79
00:04:20,476 --> 00:04:23,766
- What are you doing?
- We're just moving something upstairs.
80
00:04:24,091 --> 00:04:25,519
- What is it?
- Just...
81
00:04:26,218 --> 00:04:27,780
You know. Time machine.
82
00:04:29,145 --> 00:04:31,024
Neat. But I really got to get to work.
83
00:04:31,184 --> 00:04:34,110
- Give us a few minutes.
- I don't have them. I'm running late.
84
00:04:34,270 --> 00:04:35,926
Then, I have a simple solution.
85
00:04:36,046 --> 00:04:38,174
Go up to the roof.
Hop over to the next building.
86
00:04:38,294 --> 00:04:40,726
There's a small gap, don't look down
if you're subject to vertigo,
87
00:04:40,846 --> 00:04:42,409
and use their stairwell.
88
00:04:43,171 --> 00:04:44,370
You're joking, right?
89
00:04:44,530 --> 00:04:46,763
I never joke when it comes to vertigo.
90
00:04:48,876 --> 00:04:51,452
Damn. Okay, I'll just take the roof.
91
00:04:52,205 --> 00:04:54,225
If you wait for us
to set up the time machine,
92
00:04:54,345 --> 00:04:56,359
I can drop you off at work yesterday.
93
00:04:58,253 --> 00:05:00,261
Time travel joke.
It's not... never mind.
94
00:05:02,514 --> 00:05:04,838
For what it's worth,
I thought it was humorous.
95
00:05:08,779 --> 00:05:10,146
Let's just do this.
96
00:05:10,484 --> 00:05:12,865
- You guys ready to push?
- In a minute.
97
00:05:12,985 --> 00:05:14,899
Howard stepped outside to throw up.
98
00:05:20,608 --> 00:05:22,364
I don't know
what you were worried about.
99
00:05:22,484 --> 00:05:24,326
I think it really works in the room.
100
00:05:26,656 --> 00:05:29,511
It is by far the coolest thing
I have ever owned.
101
00:05:29,631 --> 00:05:32,543
The exact time machine
that carried actor Rod Taylor
102
00:05:32,703 --> 00:05:35,591
from Victorian England
into the post-apocalyptic future,
103
00:05:35,711 --> 00:05:37,867
where society had splintered
into two factions:
104
00:05:37,987 --> 00:05:40,657
the subterranean Morlocks,
who survived by feasting
105
00:05:40,777 --> 00:05:43,273
on the flesh of the gentle
surface-dwelling Eloi.
106
00:05:45,536 --> 00:05:47,803
Talk about your chick magnets.
107
00:05:51,249 --> 00:05:53,217
The guy who lives next to me
is always like,
108
00:05:53,337 --> 00:05:56,684
"I have a Jacuzzi on my balcony.
I have a Jacuzzi on my balcony."
109
00:05:56,804 --> 00:05:58,175
But wait until I tell him,
110
00:05:58,295 --> 00:06:00,395
"I've got a time machine
on my balcony.
111
00:06:02,066 --> 00:06:04,479
Stuff that in your Speedoes,
Jacuzzi Bob."
112
00:06:05,820 --> 00:06:08,551
Gentlemen, we said we'd take turns,
but I think you'll agree
113
00:06:08,671 --> 00:06:11,290
that practicality
dictates it remain here.
114
00:06:11,619 --> 00:06:13,904
You can't keep it here.
What if I meet a girl and say,
115
00:06:14,024 --> 00:06:15,790
"You wanna come up and see
my time machine?
116
00:06:15,910 --> 00:06:18,228
It's at my friends' house."
How lame is that?
117
00:06:18,905 --> 00:06:20,047
He's got a point.
118
00:06:20,167 --> 00:06:23,338
I think we're going to need some ground
rules; in addition to the expected
119
00:06:23,458 --> 00:06:26,216
"no shoes in the time machine,"
and "no eating in the time machine,"
120
00:06:26,336 --> 00:06:30,211
I propose we add "pants must be worn
at all times in the time machine."
121
00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:32,298
Seconded.
122
00:06:33,545 --> 00:06:35,316
I was going to put down a towel.
123
00:06:39,070 --> 00:06:40,581
I still want it on my balcony.
124
00:06:40,701 --> 00:06:43,031
I say we move it on a bi-monthly basis.
125
00:06:43,191 --> 00:06:46,159
- That sounds fair.
- Bi-monthly is an ambiguous term.
126
00:06:46,319 --> 00:06:48,160
It's every other month or twice a month?
127
00:06:48,321 --> 00:06:49,986
- Twice a month.
- Then no.
128
00:06:50,106 --> 00:06:51,903
- Okay, every other month.
- No.
129
00:06:53,583 --> 00:06:55,042
You can't be selfish.
130
00:06:55,203 --> 00:06:57,545
We all paid for it,
so it belongs to all of us.
131
00:06:57,706 --> 00:07:00,255
Now get out of the way
so I can sit in my time machine.
132
00:07:10,302 --> 00:07:14,207
I am setting the dials
for March 10, 1876.
133
00:07:14,555 --> 00:07:16,913
Good choice, Alexander Graham Bell
invents the telephone
134
00:07:17,033 --> 00:07:19,123
- and calls out for Dr. Watson.
- Wait a minute.
135
00:07:19,243 --> 00:07:21,819
- I'd want to see that, too.
- So when it's your turn, you can.
136
00:07:21,979 --> 00:07:23,783
But if we all go back to the same point,
137
00:07:23,903 --> 00:07:26,783
Bell's lab is going to get very crowded.
He'll know something's up.
138
00:07:27,934 --> 00:07:29,951
Also since the time machine
doesn't move in space,
139
00:07:30,112 --> 00:07:32,236
you'll end up in 1876 Pasadena.
140
00:07:32,356 --> 00:07:34,889
And even if you can make it to Boston,
are you going knock on the door
141
00:07:35,009 --> 00:07:37,086
and say to Mrs. Bell,
"Big fan of your husband.
142
00:07:37,206 --> 00:07:39,429
"Can I come in and watch him
invent the telephone?"
143
00:07:40,122 --> 00:07:42,757
Mrs. Bell was deaf.
She's not even going to hear you knock.
144
00:07:44,102 --> 00:07:46,667
I have a solution.
First, go into the future
145
00:07:46,787 --> 00:07:49,596
- and obtain a cloaking device.
- How far into the future?
146
00:07:49,757 --> 00:07:52,510
If I remember correctly, Captain Kirk
will steal a cloaking device
147
00:07:52,630 --> 00:07:55,611
from the Romulans on Stardate 5027.3,
148
00:07:55,731 --> 00:07:58,972
which would be January 10, 2328
by pre-Federation reckoning.
149
00:08:01,607 --> 00:08:05,302
I am setting the dials
for January 10, 2328.
150
00:08:05,911 --> 00:08:08,292
Here we go into the future.
151
00:08:29,919 --> 00:08:30,967
That was fun.
152
00:08:32,325 --> 00:08:33,224
My turn!
153
00:08:34,779 --> 00:08:36,249
Okay, first of all,
154
00:08:36,369 --> 00:08:38,871
what you call a gap
was nearly three feet wide.
155
00:08:38,991 --> 00:08:41,085
- I slipped and skinned my knee.
- Are you okay?
156
00:08:42,041 --> 00:08:44,877
Second of all, the door to the stairwell
of the other building was locked,
157
00:08:44,997 --> 00:08:47,612
so I had to go down the fire escape,
which ends on the 3d floor,
158
00:08:47,773 --> 00:08:50,748
forcing me to crawl through the window
of a lovely Armenian family
159
00:08:50,868 --> 00:08:52,735
who insisted I stay for lunch.
160
00:08:54,087 --> 00:08:56,748
- That doesn't sound too bad.
- It was eight courses of lamb,
161
00:08:56,868 --> 00:08:58,963
and they tried to fix me up
with their son.
162
00:09:01,177 --> 00:09:02,377
- Sorry.
- Not done.
163
00:09:02,538 --> 00:09:05,213
By the time I finally got to work,
they'd given my shift away.
164
00:09:05,374 --> 00:09:08,718
That's right. I lost an entire day's pay
thanks to this.
165
00:09:08,878 --> 00:09:10,553
- This...
- Time machine.
166
00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:16,638
The lights flash and the dish spins.
You want to try it?
167
00:09:17,971 --> 00:09:19,270
I don't want to try it!
168
00:09:19,431 --> 00:09:21,490
My God, you are grown men!
169
00:09:21,795 --> 00:09:25,548
How can you waste your lives
with these stupid toys and costumes
170
00:09:25,668 --> 00:09:28,404
and comic books
and now that?! That...
171
00:09:28,565 --> 00:09:30,062
Again. Time machine.
172
00:09:32,485 --> 00:09:35,262
Please, it's not a time machine.
If anything, it looks like something
173
00:09:35,382 --> 00:09:37,914
Elton John would drive
through the Everglades.
174
00:09:43,769 --> 00:09:45,750
It only moves in time.
175
00:09:45,870 --> 00:09:48,375
It would be worse than useless
in a swamp.
176
00:09:53,950 --> 00:09:55,646
Pathetic! All of you!
177
00:09:55,766 --> 00:09:57,451
Completely pathetic!
178
00:10:02,851 --> 00:10:03,822
My turn!
179
00:10:20,752 --> 00:10:22,733
Leonard, it's 2:00 in the morning.
180
00:10:23,892 --> 00:10:24,710
So?
181
00:10:24,871 --> 00:10:26,507
So it's my turn.
182
00:10:29,472 --> 00:10:31,959
Why did you set it
for the day before yesterday?
183
00:10:32,352 --> 00:10:34,238
Because I want to go back
and keep myself
184
00:10:34,358 --> 00:10:35,846
from getting a time machine.
185
00:10:36,006 --> 00:10:36,914
You can't.
186
00:10:37,034 --> 00:10:39,276
If you were to prevent yourself
from buying it in the past,
187
00:10:39,396 --> 00:10:41,657
you wouldn't have it available
in the present to travel back
188
00:10:41,777 --> 00:10:44,145
and stop yourself from buying it.
Ergo, you would still have it.
189
00:10:44,307 --> 00:10:46,615
This is a classic rookie
time-travel mistake.
190
00:10:50,026 --> 00:10:53,072
Can I go back and prevent you
from explaing that to me?
191
00:10:53,810 --> 00:10:54,836
Same paradox.
192
00:10:54,956 --> 00:10:57,659
If you were to travel back in time
and, say, knock me unconscious,
193
00:10:57,820 --> 00:11:00,090
you would not then have the conversation
that irritated you,
194
00:11:00,210 --> 00:11:02,915
motivating you to go back
and knock me unconscious.
195
00:11:04,178 --> 00:11:06,585
What if I knocked you
unconscious right now?
196
00:11:08,060 --> 00:11:09,756
It won't change the past.
197
00:11:11,598 --> 00:11:13,884
But it'd make the present so much nicer.
198
00:11:15,261 --> 00:11:17,119
Are you upset about something?
199
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:19,441
What was your first clue?
200
00:11:20,328 --> 00:11:22,068
Well, it was a number of things.
201
00:11:22,188 --> 00:11:23,454
First, the late hour.
202
00:11:23,574 --> 00:11:25,573
Then your demeanor
seems very low-energy,
203
00:11:25,693 --> 00:11:27,826
- plus your irritability.
- Yes, I'm upset!
204
00:11:28,678 --> 00:11:30,964
I don't usually pick
up on those things.
205
00:11:31,629 --> 00:11:32,674
Good for me.
206
00:11:35,952 --> 00:11:37,078
Good for you.
207
00:11:38,050 --> 00:11:38,907
Wait.
208
00:11:41,030 --> 00:11:43,330
Did you want to talk about
what's bothering you?
209
00:11:44,646 --> 00:11:47,375
- I don't know. Maybe.
- I'm on fire tonight.
210
00:11:52,899 --> 00:11:54,148
Here's the thing.
211
00:11:54,711 --> 00:11:58,561
Girls like Penny never end up
with guys who own time machines.
212
00:11:59,190 --> 00:12:00,279
I disagree.
213
00:12:00,555 --> 00:12:02,930
Your inability to
successfully woo Penny
214
00:12:03,050 --> 00:12:05,569
long predates your acquisition
of the time machine.
215
00:12:08,266 --> 00:12:10,375
That failure clearly
stands on its own.
216
00:12:12,025 --> 00:12:15,176
- Thanks for pointing it out.
- In addition, your premise is flawed.
217
00:12:15,298 --> 00:12:17,875
In the original film,
Rod Taylor got Yvette Mimieux
218
00:12:17,995 --> 00:12:19,658
with that very time machine.
219
00:12:19,818 --> 00:12:22,322
In Back to the Future,
Marty McFly got the opportunity
220
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:25,046
to hook up with his extremely
attractive young mother.
221
00:12:28,012 --> 00:12:30,704
- Those are movies.
- Of course they're movies.
222
00:12:30,824 --> 00:12:32,835
Were you expecting me to come up
with an example
223
00:12:32,955 --> 00:12:35,031
involving a real-life time machine?
224
00:12:37,304 --> 00:12:38,461
That's absurd.
225
00:12:40,702 --> 00:12:41,998
Come on, guys, push!
226
00:12:42,266 --> 00:12:45,432
If I push any harder, I'm going
to give birth to my colon.
227
00:12:47,658 --> 00:12:49,368
- Hey, guys.
- Hi, Penny.
228
00:12:52,723 --> 00:12:54,325
Take a break, guys!
229
00:12:55,429 --> 00:12:59,429
- What are you doing?
- You know, just moving a time machine.
230
00:13:00,817 --> 00:13:02,910
Neat, but I really gotta get to work.
231
00:13:03,507 --> 00:13:04,714
No problem.
232
00:13:11,266 --> 00:13:12,593
Hang on.
233
00:13:13,854 --> 00:13:15,746
But... what about your time machine?
234
00:13:15,866 --> 00:13:18,467
Some things are more
important than toys.
235
00:13:27,122 --> 00:13:28,286
I'm scared.
236
00:13:28,793 --> 00:13:30,624
Don't worry, baby. I've got you.
237
00:13:52,599 --> 00:13:54,370
It's still my turn.
238
00:13:59,950 --> 00:14:01,253
What are you doing?
239
00:14:02,513 --> 00:14:04,257
I'm packing up all my collectibles
240
00:14:04,377 --> 00:14:06,950
and taking them down
to the comic book store to sell.
241
00:14:07,291 --> 00:14:08,924
Was that really necessary?
242
00:14:09,185 --> 00:14:11,837
If you need money,
you can always sell blood.
243
00:14:13,305 --> 00:14:14,429
And semen.
244
00:14:16,267 --> 00:14:17,723
This is not about money.
245
00:14:17,957 --> 00:14:19,311
We brought food!
246
00:14:19,521 --> 00:14:22,337
Lox and bagels, the
breakfast of time-travelers.
247
00:14:22,914 --> 00:14:25,409
Terrific. Does anyone want to buy
my share of the time machine?
248
00:14:25,570 --> 00:14:27,797
- Why?
- I don't want it anymore.
249
00:14:27,917 --> 00:14:30,122
- Why?
- Just... personal reasons.
250
00:14:30,283 --> 00:14:33,334
My Spidey sense tells me this
has something to do with Penny.
251
00:14:33,753 --> 00:14:36,100
Look, do you want to
buy me out or not?
252
00:14:36,220 --> 00:14:38,501
I'll give you $100,
which will make me half-owner
253
00:14:38,621 --> 00:14:40,139
and we'll put it on my balcony.
254
00:14:40,259 --> 00:14:43,051
Screw his balcony. I'll give you
$120 and we'll put it in my garage.
255
00:14:43,350 --> 00:14:45,054
I paid $200 for my share.
256
00:14:45,214 --> 00:14:47,791
Dude, everybody knows a time
machine loses half its value
257
00:14:47,911 --> 00:14:49,901
the minute you drive
it off the lot.
258
00:14:50,279 --> 00:14:53,019
I'll go for $200. That time
machine stays right where it is.
259
00:14:53,180 --> 00:14:56,980
$300 and I'll throw in my original
1979 Mattel Millennium Falcon
260
00:14:57,100 --> 00:14:58,817
with real light speed sound effects.
261
00:14:59,174 --> 00:15:02,544
No. No more toys or action figures
262
00:15:02,797 --> 00:15:05,876
or props or replicas
or costumes or robots
263
00:15:05,996 --> 00:15:07,681
or Darth Vader voice changers.
264
00:15:07,801 --> 00:15:09,327
I'm getting rid of all of it.
265
00:15:09,488 --> 00:15:11,798
You can't do that. Look
what you've created here.
266
00:15:11,918 --> 00:15:13,622
It's like nerdvana.
267
00:15:16,947 --> 00:15:20,005
More importantly,
you have a Darth Vader voice changer?
268
00:15:21,727 --> 00:15:23,019
Not for long.
269
00:15:23,139 --> 00:15:24,827
I call dibs on The Golden Age Flash.
270
00:15:24,947 --> 00:15:27,588
I need that to complete my
Justice Society of America collection.
271
00:15:27,708 --> 00:15:30,041
- Too bad. I called dibs.
- You can't just call dibs.
272
00:15:30,161 --> 00:15:32,642
I can and I did.
Look up "Dibs" in Wikipedia.
273
00:15:33,321 --> 00:15:35,244
Dibs doesn't apply
in a bidding war.
274
00:15:35,364 --> 00:15:36,771
It's not a bidding war.
275
00:15:36,932 --> 00:15:39,358
I'm selling it all to Larry
down at the comic book store.
276
00:15:39,518 --> 00:15:42,028
- Did Larry call dibs?
- Will you forget dibs?!
277
00:15:42,148 --> 00:15:44,473
He offered me a fair price
for the whole collection.
278
00:15:44,593 --> 00:15:48,422
- What's the number? I'll match it.
- I'll match it plus a thousand rupees.
279
00:15:48,849 --> 00:15:50,983
- What's the exchange rate?
- None of your business.
280
00:15:51,103 --> 00:15:52,496
Take it or leave it?
281
00:15:52,906 --> 00:15:55,187
Mom? My bar mitzvah bonds.
How much do I got?
282
00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:56,453
Thanks.
283
00:15:56,641 --> 00:15:59,016
I can go $2,600 and two trees in Israel.
284
00:16:01,351 --> 00:16:02,373
Forget it, guys.
285
00:16:02,493 --> 00:16:05,361
If I sell to one of you, the other two
are going to be really mad at me.
286
00:16:05,481 --> 00:16:07,771
Who cares? As long as you pick me!
287
00:16:08,721 --> 00:16:10,798
Okay, Leonard, put down the box.
Let's talk.
288
00:16:10,918 --> 00:16:12,843
Sorry, Raj. My mind is made up.
289
00:16:13,134 --> 00:16:13,951
No!
290
00:16:14,284 --> 00:16:16,312
I can't let you do this.
291
00:16:16,877 --> 00:16:18,355
Get out of my way.
292
00:16:21,993 --> 00:16:24,154
None shall pass!
293
00:16:29,275 --> 00:16:30,868
I did not want to do this,
294
00:16:31,205 --> 00:16:34,414
but I have here the rare mint
condition production error
295
00:16:34,534 --> 00:16:36,798
Star Trek: The Next Generation
Geordi La Forge
296
00:16:36,918 --> 00:16:39,376
without his visor
in the original packaging.
297
00:16:40,102 --> 00:16:42,035
If you do not get out of my way,
298
00:16:42,646 --> 00:16:43,908
I will open it.
299
00:16:45,245 --> 00:16:47,048
Okay, man. Be cool.
300
00:16:48,104 --> 00:16:49,595
We're all friends here.
301
00:16:50,973 --> 00:16:52,473
What the hell's going on?
302
00:16:52,683 --> 00:16:54,133
You hypocrite!
303
00:16:54,684 --> 00:16:55,499
What?
304
00:16:55,664 --> 00:16:57,974
Little Miss "grown-ups
don't play with toys."
305
00:16:58,094 --> 00:17:01,648
If I were to go into that apartment now,
would I not find Beanie Babies?
306
00:17:01,809 --> 00:17:04,638
Are you not an accumulator
of Care Bears and My Little Ponies?
307
00:17:04,758 --> 00:17:07,779
And who is that Japanese feline
I see frolicking on your shorts?
308
00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:10,104
Hello, Hello Kitty!
309
00:17:14,453 --> 00:17:16,744
Okay, look, if this is about yesterday,
Leonard,
310
00:17:16,864 --> 00:17:19,457
I am really sorry about what I said.
I was just upset.
311
00:17:19,619 --> 00:17:22,650
- I need to hear it.
- No, you didn't. You are a great guy
312
00:17:22,770 --> 00:17:25,664
and it is the things you love
that make you who you are.
313
00:17:26,338 --> 00:17:28,895
I guess that makes
me "large breasts."
314
00:17:33,300 --> 00:17:36,335
Still, I think it's time for
me to get rid of this stuff
315
00:17:36,455 --> 00:17:38,526
and, you know,
move on with my life.
316
00:17:39,031 --> 00:17:40,872
- Really?
- Yeah.
317
00:17:42,659 --> 00:17:44,445
Well, good for you.
318
00:17:45,579 --> 00:17:46,536
Thanks.
319
00:17:48,683 --> 00:17:51,199
Do you want to...
I don't know, later...
320
00:17:51,378 --> 00:17:52,385
Excuse me.
321
00:17:53,080 --> 00:17:54,545
- Hey, Penny.
- Hi, Mike.
322
00:17:54,665 --> 00:17:56,606
- Ready to go?
- I just have to change.
323
00:17:56,726 --> 00:17:59,025
- I'll give you a hand.
- Stop it!
324
00:17:59,368 --> 00:18:00,289
Bye, guys.
325
00:18:05,632 --> 00:18:07,232
My turn on the time machine!
326
00:18:30,022 --> 00:18:31,145
It worked.
327
00:18:32,995 --> 00:18:34,532
It really worked.
328
00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:38,481
They said I was mad, but it worked!
329
00:18:46,925 --> 00:18:48,254
Not Morlocks!
330
00:18:48,658 --> 00:18:50,857
Not flesh-eating Morlocks!
331
00:18:51,327 --> 00:18:53,186
Help!
332
00:19:01,575 --> 00:19:03,627
Sheldon, are you okay?
333
00:19:04,302 --> 00:19:06,545
We have to get rid
of the time machine.
334
00:19:06,899 --> 00:19:09,108
It is a little big
for the living room, isn't it?
335
00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,401
Yeah, that's the problem. It's too big.
336
00:19:13,206 --> 00:19:15,904
I'm glad you agree.
I hired some guys to help us move it.
337
00:19:16,024 --> 00:19:17,338
Come on in, fellas.
338
00:19:21,812 --> 00:19:22,866
Morlocks!
339
00:19:23,102 --> 00:19:24,905
Eat him. Eat him.