1
00:00:03,443 --> 00:00:04,976
So what happened here?
2
00:00:05,043 --> 00:00:07,678
You ever use the phrase
"bonebag"?
3
00:00:07,747 --> 00:00:08,746
No.
4
00:00:08,814 --> 00:00:09,680
Don't.
5
00:00:12,004 --> 00:00:13,371
I mean, yeah,
you would think that.
6
00:00:13,491 --> 00:00:15,387
But actually not everything
is good in a taco.
7
00:00:15,453 --> 00:00:16,986
Hey, that guy just cut you off!
8
00:00:18,022 --> 00:00:19,460
Hey, stop it! That is not cool.
9
00:00:19,580 --> 00:00:21,957
All right, when I'm driving,
I'm the horn captain.
10
00:00:22,025 --> 00:00:23,308
Yeah, okay, Captain.
11
00:00:23,428 --> 00:00:24,752
Well, then use your horn
like a man.
12
00:00:25,548 --> 00:00:26,285
Hey.
13
00:00:26,405 --> 00:00:27,594
God.
14
00:00:27,826 --> 00:00:29,413
Oh, my G...
15
00:00:34,130 --> 00:00:35,508
That's very nice.
That's really good.
16
00:00:35,531 --> 00:00:37,164
I'll make sure she gets
the message, buddy.
17
00:00:37,284 --> 00:00:39,072
Hey, screw you, bonebag!
18
00:00:39,139 --> 00:00:40,640
Stop it. Just... enough already.
What?!
19
00:00:40,708 --> 00:00:41,573
I just took a finger bowl for you.
What'd you call me?!
20
00:00:41,642 --> 00:00:43,642
Adam...
Just let it go.
21
00:00:43,711 --> 00:00:44,810
Oh! Oh, my God!
22
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,778
I'll break your nose!
23
00:00:46,847 --> 00:00:48,281
Bonebag!
24
00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:49,748
What does that even mean?!
25
00:00:50,951 --> 00:00:52,729
Oh...
26
00:00:52,849 --> 00:00:54,444
I got one conference
in the afternoon,
27
00:00:54,564 --> 00:00:58,155
and then I got the hotel room
all night.
28
00:00:58,222 --> 00:00:59,658
Honey, we can have sex here.
29
00:00:59,682 --> 00:01:01,258
I'm not talking about sex.
30
00:01:01,325 --> 00:01:02,038
Excuse me.
31
00:01:02,158 --> 00:01:03,726
I'm talking about hotel sex.
32
00:01:03,794 --> 00:01:06,362
I do enjoy a postcoital
pillow chocolate.
33
00:01:06,430 --> 00:01:08,353
But you know what,
he's so young.
34
00:01:08,354 --> 00:01:10,088
We've never spent
the night away from him.
35
00:01:10,156 --> 00:01:11,756
Is that something
we even want to do?
36
00:01:11,824 --> 00:01:13,090
Yes! Absolutely.
37
00:01:13,158 --> 00:01:14,291
We totally want...
38
00:01:14,360 --> 00:01:15,769
I love Tommy.
Come on, Tommy's great.
39
00:01:15,889 --> 00:01:16,660
Tommy, high five.
40
00:01:16,728 --> 00:01:18,696
Yeah!
Yeah!
41
00:01:18,763 --> 00:01:20,532
But he's a little needy.
42
00:01:21,632 --> 00:01:23,365
He takes after his daddy.
43
00:01:24,500 --> 00:01:27,469
Plus, we don't have
a sitter we trust for the night.
44
00:01:27,536 --> 00:01:28,603
How about Adam and Callie?
45
00:01:28,671 --> 00:01:30,556
Yeah, they'd want to do that.
46
00:01:30,676 --> 00:01:32,439
Come on.
Adam's been asking for months.
47
00:01:32,507 --> 00:01:34,108
Oh, oh, really?
If I can get him,
48
00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:35,175
are we in?
49
00:01:35,243 --> 00:01:36,910
Are you in?
50
00:01:36,977 --> 00:01:38,077
All right, all right.
51
00:01:38,145 --> 00:01:39,545
If he... if they'll do it.
52
00:01:39,613 --> 00:01:42,013
But the hotel better have
a crazy-high thread count,
53
00:01:42,082 --> 00:01:43,216
'cause it's been so long.
54
00:01:43,283 --> 00:01:44,750
I already checked.
55
00:01:44,817 --> 00:01:45,717
It's off the hook.
56
00:01:45,785 --> 00:01:47,585
Oh, I love you.
57
00:01:52,294 --> 00:01:54,290
This guy's too old
to be having sex.
58
00:01:54,358 --> 00:01:55,891
I hate my job.
59
00:01:57,761 --> 00:01:59,460
Oh, man!
60
00:01:59,528 --> 00:02:01,784
It's been 24 hours,
and this thing won't go down.
61
00:02:01,904 --> 00:02:02,920
You guys got to do something!
62
00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:04,290
All right,
take it easy, sailor.
63
00:02:04,410 --> 00:02:05,355
We'll be at the hospital soon.
64
00:02:05,475 --> 00:02:06,132
Try to relax.
65
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:07,267
I'm trying to relax,
66
00:02:07,335 --> 00:02:08,936
but you guys have no idea
67
00:02:09,004 --> 00:02:11,369
what it's like to be in
a perpetual state of arousal.
68
00:02:11,437 --> 00:02:12,837
Oh, I believe I do.
He does.
69
00:02:12,906 --> 00:02:15,039
He's like an animal.
70
00:02:15,107 --> 00:02:16,275
Well, you are.
71
00:02:16,342 --> 00:02:17,475
Trust me, son,
72
00:02:17,543 --> 00:02:19,265
you don't want
to turn out like this.
73
00:02:19,385 --> 00:02:21,945
I never made
a lasting commitment.
74
00:02:22,014 --> 00:02:25,087
I only cared about my pleasure.
75
00:02:25,207 --> 00:02:30,418
I never made room for love.
I never made room for love.
76
00:02:30,486 --> 00:02:33,921
I never made room for love.
77
00:02:40,746 --> 00:02:43,329
I'm telling you,
it was horrible.
78
00:02:43,395 --> 00:02:46,731
The sweaty desperation,
his whole old boner dude aura.
79
00:02:46,799 --> 00:02:48,499
Whew. Like watching
Larry King Live.
80
00:02:48,568 --> 00:02:50,167
Hey, wait a second.
That man is a broadcaster,
81
00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:51,335
he's not a punch line.
82
00:02:51,402 --> 00:02:52,903
Really?
83
00:02:52,970 --> 00:02:55,037
Just sick of people making fun
of Larry King, you know.
84
00:02:55,105 --> 00:02:56,671
Guy's been delivering news 53 years,
85
00:02:56,740 --> 00:02:57,672
gets no respect.
86
00:02:57,739 --> 00:02:59,040
I like Larry King a lot.
87
00:02:59,108 --> 00:03:00,743
And, see, listen,
it's fine for you guys.
88
00:03:00,863 --> 00:03:01,994
You have a great thing
with Lisa,
89
00:03:02,114 --> 00:03:03,048
you and Callie are on the road.
90
00:03:03,168 --> 00:03:05,409
Yeah, we're on the road.
Unless somebody cuts me off.
91
00:03:05,664 --> 00:03:07,246
The other day,
she almost got me killed.
92
00:03:07,313 --> 00:03:08,814
She starts yelling at some guy
while I'm driving.
93
00:03:08,883 --> 00:03:10,649
So Callie's got road rage, huh?
94
00:03:10,717 --> 00:03:12,252
Yeah, she's got everything rage.
I don't know
95
00:03:12,318 --> 00:03:13,219
if she can control it.
96
00:03:15,387 --> 00:03:17,555
Y-You took two?
97
00:03:17,622 --> 00:03:19,889
Y-You paid for one,
but you took two.
98
00:03:19,957 --> 00:03:23,292
Hey, extra, extra, bonebag
thinks rules don't apply to him!
99
00:03:29,164 --> 00:03:30,732
Hey! Hey!
Whoa!
100
00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:32,633
Give me an egg.
What are you gonna do?
101
00:03:32,700 --> 00:03:33,982
Bonebag!
102
00:03:34,668 --> 00:03:36,168
Oh! Nailed him!
103
00:03:37,271 --> 00:03:38,670
Oh, crap, run.
104
00:03:38,738 --> 00:03:39,539
Bonebag?
105
00:03:39,607 --> 00:03:40,606
What does that even mean?
106
00:03:40,673 --> 00:03:41,806
I think she's combining
107
00:03:41,875 --> 00:03:43,174
"douche bag" and "bonehead."
108
00:03:43,242 --> 00:03:44,476
It's kind of
elegant wordplay actually.
109
00:03:44,543 --> 00:03:45,644
Like "spork."
110
00:03:45,711 --> 00:03:46,877
Yeah, yeah,
exactly like "spork."
111
00:03:47,605 --> 00:03:48,678
Think what really
sets people off
112
00:03:48,798 --> 00:03:49,781
is the whole ambiguity of it,
you know.
113
00:03:49,847 --> 00:03:51,157
That and the crazy eyes.
114
00:03:51,771 --> 00:03:52,941
But let me tell you this.
115
00:03:53,061 --> 00:03:56,018
If something was to actually
go down, I'd be all over that.
116
00:03:56,086 --> 00:03:58,854
You know, 'cause I'm six-five,
not afraid to mix it up.
117
00:03:59,933 --> 00:04:00,717
Mix it up?
118
00:04:00,837 --> 00:04:01,789
Really? Is that what you do?
119
00:04:01,856 --> 00:04:03,657
Been known to mix it up.
Next time
120
00:04:03,725 --> 00:04:05,619
you mix it up, can you let
me know? I'd love to see that.
121
00:04:05,739 --> 00:04:08,893
Thing about that is, you can't
actually see it when I mix it up
122
00:04:09,013 --> 00:04:10,161
with your human eyes.
123
00:04:10,229 --> 00:04:11,830
'Cause I'm so fast,
I'm like a blender.
124
00:04:11,897 --> 00:04:13,130
You know what I'm saying?
Mm-hmm.
125
00:04:13,199 --> 00:04:15,289
Yeah, you got to
embrace Callie's anger.
126
00:04:15,409 --> 00:04:17,201
Lisa, she has this crazy hatred
127
00:04:17,269 --> 00:04:18,702
for stores that claim to
be going out of business.
128
00:04:18,770 --> 00:04:19,603
Hmm?
Frankly, I don't really care.
129
00:04:19,670 --> 00:04:20,939
It's been consistently proven
130
00:04:21,006 --> 00:04:22,372
to boost sales.
I know.
131
00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:24,107
But I pretend that
it drives me crazy,
132
00:04:24,175 --> 00:04:25,207
you know, for Lisa's sake.
133
00:04:25,276 --> 00:04:26,876
It calms her down
and it gives us
134
00:04:26,943 --> 00:04:28,076
something to be
angry about together.
135
00:04:29,013 --> 00:04:30,845
Oh, my God! Really?!
What?
136
00:04:30,913 --> 00:04:31,654
What?
Look.
137
00:04:31,774 --> 00:04:33,816
Guess who's going
out of business again.
138
00:04:33,883 --> 00:04:36,417
How many times can a futon store
go out of business?
139
00:04:36,485 --> 00:04:37,852
Oh, come on!
140
00:04:37,919 --> 00:04:39,293
I can't believe you!
141
00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:41,454
Who do these bastards
think they are?!
142
00:04:41,522 --> 00:04:43,456
God.
143
00:04:43,523 --> 00:04:44,522
God, I love you.
144
00:04:44,590 --> 00:04:45,890
You see, that's beautiful.
145
00:04:45,957 --> 00:04:47,357
That's what I'm talking about.
146
00:04:47,425 --> 00:04:48,725
From now on, I only want
147
00:04:48,794 --> 00:04:50,294
the kind of commitment
you guys have.
148
00:04:50,361 --> 00:04:52,295
Wow. That old man
really shook you up?
149
00:04:52,362 --> 00:04:54,130
I am making room for love.
150
00:04:54,197 --> 00:04:56,698
You know, I've already signed up
for an online dating service.
151
00:04:56,766 --> 00:04:58,099
Yeah, I'm only gonna date women
152
00:04:58,167 --> 00:04:59,434
who are looking for
something serious.
153
00:04:59,502 --> 00:05:01,702
In fact, under "hobbies,"
I put listening...
154
00:05:01,770 --> 00:05:02,637
Wow.
Okay.
155
00:05:02,704 --> 00:05:03,738
...and feeling my feelings...
156
00:05:03,806 --> 00:05:05,172
Whatever that means.
...and brunch.
157
00:05:05,239 --> 00:05:06,728
Oh, that's great.
Everybody loves brunch.
158
00:05:06,848 --> 00:05:10,108
So, uh...
I got something incredibly fun
159
00:05:10,176 --> 00:05:11,544
brewing Saturday night.
160
00:05:11,611 --> 00:05:12,445
What are you and Callie doing?
161
00:05:12,565 --> 00:05:14,312
Yeah, Saturday night...
we're wide open.
162
00:05:14,380 --> 00:05:16,447
Awesome. You guys can
watch Tommy while Lisa and I
163
00:05:16,514 --> 00:05:18,281
go downtown, stay in
this really cool hotel.
164
00:05:18,349 --> 00:05:19,949
That does sound incredibly fun.
165
00:05:20,017 --> 00:05:21,184
Yeah.
For you.
166
00:05:21,251 --> 00:05:23,086
Come on.
I wouldn't trap you like that
167
00:05:23,154 --> 00:05:24,375
unless it meant something to me.
168
00:05:24,495 --> 00:05:26,379
Gentlemen, here's to finding
a beautiful woman who's looking
169
00:05:26,499 --> 00:05:28,923
for a lifetime of commitment
just like you two have.
170
00:05:29,043 --> 00:05:30,007
Hey, I want to have
what you two have:
171
00:05:30,127 --> 00:05:31,606
Saturday night with no kid.
172
00:05:31,726 --> 00:05:33,246
And you can have
what Lisa and I have
173
00:05:33,366 --> 00:05:34,461
by watching Tommy
on Saturday night.
174
00:05:34,530 --> 00:05:37,096
See? To everybody having
everyone else's lives.
175
00:05:37,163 --> 00:05:38,597
Hear, hear!
I never actually said I wanted it.
176
00:05:38,665 --> 00:05:39,964
Yeah, but you clinked,
so that happened.
177
00:05:40,032 --> 00:05:40,898
Mm, mm.
Oh, my God.
178
00:05:40,965 --> 00:05:42,499
It's done.
179
00:05:44,003 --> 00:05:46,273
Seriously,
this parenting thing is easy.
180
00:05:46,725 --> 00:05:48,537
Yeah, he's a good
little eater, huh?
181
00:05:48,605 --> 00:05:51,206
Yeah. You haven't had
to call him a bonebag once.
182
00:05:51,274 --> 00:05:52,741
Must be your motherly instinct
kicking in.
183
00:05:52,808 --> 00:05:54,444
Yeah, okay, just to be clear,
184
00:05:54,511 --> 00:05:57,077
we're not using this weekend
as a trial run for anything.
185
00:05:57,145 --> 00:05:58,478
Oh, you mean
raising our own child?
186
00:05:58,546 --> 00:05:59,714
God, no.
187
00:05:59,780 --> 00:06:01,515
The only upside
to raising a child so far
188
00:06:01,582 --> 00:06:02,650
is these, uh, teething cookies.
189
00:06:02,716 --> 00:06:03,616
God.
190
00:06:03,683 --> 00:06:05,383
Do you smell something horrible?
191
00:06:06,878 --> 00:06:07,581
No, no.
192
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,701
I don't smell anything.
I didn't do anything.
193
00:06:10,791 --> 00:06:11,556
It was him.
194
00:06:13,629 --> 00:06:14,858
Yeah, I assumed so.
195
00:06:14,925 --> 00:06:15,792
Oh, yeah.
196
00:06:15,860 --> 00:06:17,260
I'll go change him.
197
00:06:17,327 --> 00:06:18,290
Come on, cutie pie.
198
00:06:18,410 --> 00:06:20,128
Yeah, snap a new one on him.
199
00:06:21,034 --> 00:06:22,329
Ah, bonebag!
200
00:06:22,398 --> 00:06:23,431
What is it?
201
00:06:23,498 --> 00:06:25,098
"Bonebag"?
Oh, Callie invented it.
202
00:06:25,167 --> 00:06:26,631
Just, expression of
extreme disappointment...
203
00:06:26,751 --> 00:06:27,902
No, the text.
Oh.
204
00:06:27,969 --> 00:06:30,239
Uh, they canceled
the conference.
205
00:06:30,359 --> 00:06:32,777
Oh. All right, well, then let's
just turn around and go home.
206
00:06:32,897 --> 00:06:34,137
We should be with Tommy anyway.
207
00:06:34,704 --> 00:06:38,143
Or maybe we just continue on
with our plans for the evening.
208
00:06:38,210 --> 00:06:39,577
Look,
209
00:06:39,644 --> 00:06:42,279
we have not had a night off
since Tommy was born.
210
00:06:42,346 --> 00:06:44,737
Come on. I miss you.
I miss my wife.
211
00:06:45,675 --> 00:06:46,482
All right.
212
00:06:46,549 --> 00:06:48,984
Just let me have
one check-in call for Tommy.
213
00:06:49,051 --> 00:06:50,417
Okay, Lise.
214
00:06:50,485 --> 00:06:52,320
Yeah. We will text you updates.
215
00:06:52,387 --> 00:06:54,287
But I'm telling you,
Tommy is doing awesome.
216
00:06:54,355 --> 00:06:56,890
He finished off a whole box
of these teething crackers.
217
00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:58,502
So where do you
get those anyway?
218
00:06:58,622 --> 00:07:01,155
Adam! There's something
wrong with Tommy.
219
00:07:01,275 --> 00:07:02,628
Okay, uh, I got to go.
220
00:07:02,696 --> 00:07:04,095
Definitely nothing
wrong with Tommy.
221
00:07:04,163 --> 00:07:05,731
Uh, all right, bye.
Have fun.
222
00:07:06,933 --> 00:07:07,931
What?
223
00:07:07,999 --> 00:07:09,366
Look at him.
Oh, good Lord.
224
00:07:09,433 --> 00:07:10,366
His kickstand's up.
225
00:07:11,569 --> 00:07:13,336
Wait, what are you doing?
226
00:07:13,403 --> 00:07:14,403
Calling 911.
227
00:07:14,470 --> 00:07:16,071
No. No, no.
They record those calls.
228
00:07:16,138 --> 00:07:17,973
I don't think
we want that on our record.
229
00:07:18,040 --> 00:07:19,287
I got a better idea.
230
00:07:21,276 --> 00:07:23,609
All right.
Just gonna text Ethan.
231
00:07:23,677 --> 00:07:26,035
Hey, Tommy, why don't you think
about baseball, buddy.
232
00:07:26,155 --> 00:07:27,321
Ah, it's getting worse!
233
00:07:27,441 --> 00:07:29,310
Okay, no baseball.
Think about soccer, okay?
234
00:07:29,347 --> 00:07:30,415
Everybody hates soccer.
235
00:07:30,482 --> 00:07:31,949
Oh, my God, what if he's hurt?
236
00:07:32,016 --> 00:07:33,699
What if it's broken?
What does it mean?
237
00:07:33,819 --> 00:07:35,251
I think it means he likes you.
238
00:07:35,319 --> 00:07:36,175
Do we put him in the bath?
239
00:07:36,295 --> 00:07:38,253
No, I-I want to take this
to the next level.
240
00:07:38,322 --> 00:07:39,888
Here we go.
241
00:07:39,956 --> 00:07:41,723
Ethan says that he has
a date in the park,
242
00:07:41,790 --> 00:07:43,557
and he will meet us in ten minutes.
Okay.
243
00:07:43,625 --> 00:07:45,792
I'm just gonna put some
pants on Dr. Feelgood here.
244
00:07:45,860 --> 00:07:47,594
Okay.
All right. Okay.
245
00:07:47,662 --> 00:07:48,661
Hey.
246
00:07:48,728 --> 00:07:50,128
Good Tommy.
247
00:07:50,197 --> 00:07:51,096
We're your friends, Tommy.
248
00:07:51,165 --> 00:07:52,645
Tommy.
249
00:07:56,645 --> 00:07:57,682
Tommy will be fine.
250
00:07:57,802 --> 00:07:59,107
It's, uh, it's totally normal.
251
00:07:59,227 --> 00:08:01,366
It's incredibly disturbing,
but totally normal.
252
00:08:01,486 --> 00:08:02,365
Whew!
253
00:08:03,021 --> 00:08:03,674
Good.
254
00:08:03,794 --> 00:08:05,115
Um, Ethan?
255
00:08:05,218 --> 00:08:05,949
Uh-huh.
256
00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:07,721
There's a lady over there
257
00:08:07,841 --> 00:08:11,322
staring at you with, like,
a really intense weird look.
258
00:08:11,390 --> 00:08:13,656
Yeah, that's his Internet date.
259
00:08:13,726 --> 00:08:15,325
Oh, she's so stunning.
260
00:08:17,594 --> 00:08:19,294
Good luck.
261
00:08:19,362 --> 00:08:21,497
Oh, he can't hear you now.
262
00:08:21,564 --> 00:08:23,190
He's like a zombie
when he's smitten.
263
00:08:23,310 --> 00:08:24,899
Good luck, zombie Ethan.
264
00:08:25,784 --> 00:08:28,501
Committed Listener 515?
265
00:08:28,569 --> 00:08:31,119
Oh, I can only pray
that you're Long-Term Silver.
266
00:08:31,239 --> 00:08:33,667
"Hobbies include listening
and feeling my feelings"?
267
00:08:33,787 --> 00:08:34,987
And brunch.
268
00:08:35,107 --> 00:08:36,831
You know what, I think
that she might be the one.
269
00:08:36,951 --> 00:08:38,609
Really?
270
00:08:38,677 --> 00:08:39,510
No.
271
00:08:41,012 --> 00:08:42,389
Speaking of zombies.
272
00:08:42,509 --> 00:08:44,514
Hey, Mr. Zombie Boy.
273
00:08:44,583 --> 00:08:46,549
Hey, Tommy.
How you doing, buddy?
274
00:08:49,152 --> 00:08:50,818
Uh-oh.
My glasses.
275
00:08:53,389 --> 00:08:55,589
Oh.
They're taking Tommy to the park.
276
00:08:55,657 --> 00:08:57,469
Wow. He is, like, crazy happy.
277
00:08:57,589 --> 00:08:58,792
He's smiling from ear to ear.
278
00:08:58,862 --> 00:08:59,659
I know.
279
00:08:59,726 --> 00:09:01,127
Well, now that we got that,
280
00:09:01,194 --> 00:09:04,229
put that away and we can relax;
we can get our massages.
281
00:09:04,296 --> 00:09:05,396
All right.
282
00:09:05,464 --> 00:09:07,198
Okay. I'm done.
283
00:09:07,265 --> 00:09:09,110
Hi. I'm Laurie.
284
00:09:09,230 --> 00:09:11,368
I'll be one of
your masseuses today.
285
00:09:11,488 --> 00:09:12,602
Hi, Laurie.
Hi.
286
00:09:12,671 --> 00:09:14,171
And I'm Dan.
287
00:09:14,238 --> 00:09:15,672
I'll be your other masseuse.
288
00:09:15,739 --> 00:09:16,460
Great.
289
00:09:16,580 --> 00:09:19,275
Yeah, I'm sorry... um,
who are you gonna be rubbing?
290
00:09:20,116 --> 00:09:22,443
Well, that's...
up to you guys.
291
00:09:22,512 --> 00:09:26,972
Uh, no offense, Dan, um...
seem like a great guy...
292
00:09:27,092 --> 00:09:29,015
but I'm just wondering, uh,
is there someone else who could
293
00:09:29,084 --> 00:09:31,019
help us out with this,
maybe, like, another lady?
294
00:09:33,287 --> 00:09:35,055
No, I'm sorry.
We're fully booked.
295
00:09:35,122 --> 00:09:36,055
It's okay, it's okay.
296
00:09:36,123 --> 00:09:37,122
Dan can do me, all right?
297
00:09:37,190 --> 00:09:38,591
No, he's not gonna do you.
I'm sorry.
298
00:09:38,658 --> 00:09:40,858
Look, I'm not gonna have
some guy oiling up my wife.
299
00:09:40,926 --> 00:09:42,093
Honey, it doesn't matter.
300
00:09:42,162 --> 00:09:43,228
You don't think it's weird
301
00:09:43,295 --> 00:09:44,495
that Laurie's gonna be
oiling me?
302
00:09:44,563 --> 00:09:45,395
Because she's a very attractive
young lady.
303
00:09:45,463 --> 00:09:46,898
Honey, she's a masseuse.
304
00:09:46,965 --> 00:09:48,898
It's her job. It doesn't
bother me, okay? Come on.
305
00:09:49,553 --> 00:09:51,067
You know what, Dan,
I'm gonna have you do me.
306
00:09:51,135 --> 00:09:52,634
Great.
307
00:09:52,703 --> 00:09:53,803
Man on man.
308
00:09:54,567 --> 00:09:55,876
Uh... okay.
309
00:09:55,996 --> 00:09:57,509
Well, why don't
you guys disrobe
310
00:09:57,629 --> 00:09:59,441
and, uh, we'll give
you some privacy.
311
00:09:59,508 --> 00:10:01,174
Okay, thanks.
312
00:10:01,242 --> 00:10:02,409
All right.
313
00:10:09,892 --> 00:10:12,017
And then Grammy got a letter
from the War Department
314
00:10:12,085 --> 00:10:13,919
saying that he had
been killed in Anzio.
315
00:10:13,986 --> 00:10:15,654
But she didn't believe it, did she?
No.
316
00:10:15,721 --> 00:10:16,751
She did not.
317
00:10:16,871 --> 00:10:19,958
And six years later, Grampy
walked through that door.
318
00:10:20,997 --> 00:10:22,348
And sure, his hands
had been blown off,
319
00:10:22,468 --> 00:10:24,746
but he had flowers
taped to his stumps.
320
00:10:25,136 --> 00:10:27,296
And for the next 50 years,
321
00:10:27,365 --> 00:10:28,998
they lived a life
of total happiness.
322
00:10:29,067 --> 00:10:30,765
You see, that is what I want:
323
00:10:30,835 --> 00:10:34,770
exactly what your grandparents
had, but with hands.
324
00:10:34,837 --> 00:10:38,139
Well, mister, I think
you just found it.
325
00:10:40,241 --> 00:10:43,209
This might be the first
day of our life together.
326
00:10:44,840 --> 00:10:46,740
Well, what are we waiting for?
327
00:10:49,409 --> 00:10:52,516
Whoo!
328
00:10:52,584 --> 00:10:54,785
Come on. Come on.
329
00:10:54,853 --> 00:10:56,353
You're welcome.
330
00:11:02,425 --> 00:11:05,127
Good luck, guys.
331
00:11:05,194 --> 00:11:08,829
Oh!
332
00:11:17,504 --> 00:11:19,671
Mmm...
333
00:11:23,775 --> 00:11:25,543
Whoa!
334
00:11:32,516 --> 00:11:34,617
Oh, my hands!
335
00:11:46,794 --> 00:11:49,195
You like that sound?
336
00:11:49,263 --> 00:11:51,139
That's your lotion.
337
00:11:52,365 --> 00:11:54,600
Heating up.
338
00:11:54,668 --> 00:11:56,468
Get ready for it.
339
00:11:58,838 --> 00:12:00,104
Mmm.
Okay. Yeah.
340
00:12:00,173 --> 00:12:01,238
No, can't do this.
Sorry.
341
00:12:01,306 --> 00:12:02,706
I, uh... yeah,
I'm gonna need Laurie.
342
00:12:02,773 --> 00:12:03,773
Yep, sorry.
Is everything okay?
343
00:12:05,810 --> 00:12:07,075
Hey, check this out.
344
00:12:07,144 --> 00:12:08,209
We're kind of parenting here.
345
00:12:08,278 --> 00:12:10,046
Yeah, kind of rockin' it.
346
00:12:10,113 --> 00:12:11,980
Yeah, it makes all that
complaining Mike always does
347
00:12:12,048 --> 00:12:13,682
seem ridiculous.
348
00:12:13,750 --> 00:12:16,685
Hey! Hey, that kid
just pushed Tommy down,
349
00:12:16,805 --> 00:12:18,318
and his dad's not doing
anything about it.
350
00:12:18,386 --> 00:12:20,386
Yeah, I mean, Tommy
looks all right.
351
00:12:20,454 --> 00:12:23,083
No, no, no. It's the
principle here, okay?
352
00:12:23,203 --> 00:12:24,123
You can't j...
353
00:12:24,190 --> 00:12:25,892
Hey! Hey, you!
Oh... whoa, whoa.
354
00:12:25,958 --> 00:12:26,925
Just... hey, hey.
355
00:12:26,993 --> 00:12:28,260
Hey, just take it easy.
356
00:12:28,328 --> 00:12:29,195
I agree.
357
00:12:29,315 --> 00:12:32,230
Th-this is... ridiculous,
358
00:12:32,350 --> 00:12:34,344
and I am just as enraged
as you are about this.
359
00:12:34,464 --> 00:12:36,283
Really?
Ye... uh, yes.
360
00:12:36,403 --> 00:12:37,934
Okay. You going to do
something about it?
361
00:12:38,003 --> 00:12:39,868
Y-yes. Yes, I am.
362
00:12:39,937 --> 00:12:41,637
Now would be the time.
363
00:12:42,972 --> 00:12:45,573
Hey.
364
00:12:45,641 --> 00:12:46,975
What's up?
Hey.
365
00:12:47,043 --> 00:12:48,377
How you doing?
Hey.
366
00:12:48,443 --> 00:12:50,678
Your, uh... your kid just
pushed my kid down over there.
367
00:12:50,746 --> 00:12:53,090
Oh. Yeah, well,
boys will do that.
368
00:12:53,210 --> 00:12:53,999
I know. I know.
369
00:12:54,119 --> 00:12:55,184
Could you, um...?
370
00:12:55,252 --> 00:12:56,480
This guy...
371
00:12:56,874 --> 00:12:58,635
I'm sorry. Could you
do me a favor and just, like,
372
00:12:58,901 --> 00:13:00,520
pretend that you're, like,
really angry
373
00:13:00,590 --> 00:13:02,179
at me right now?
What did you say?
374
00:13:02,299 --> 00:13:03,591
If that was, like,
a two or something,
375
00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:04,758
just bring it up
to, like, a nine.
376
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,226
What the hell is
your problem, man?
377
00:13:06,293 --> 00:13:07,127
Yeah, okay, that's good.
That's good.
378
00:13:07,194 --> 00:13:08,327
Just live in that space.
379
00:13:08,396 --> 00:13:09,328
That'd be...
that would be perfect.
380
00:13:09,396 --> 00:13:10,495
I'm not gonna live in any sp...
381
00:13:10,564 --> 00:13:11,463
Hey, what are you, weird?
382
00:13:11,532 --> 00:13:13,895
Yes. Yes, I am.
383
00:13:14,015 --> 00:13:16,096
I'm... I'm really sorry
about that.
384
00:13:18,420 --> 00:13:20,631
Hey! Yeah, you.
Uh, hey, Callie.
385
00:13:20,751 --> 00:13:23,101
So this is... this is the
gentleman that we're yelling at.
386
00:13:23,221 --> 00:13:25,012
Yeah, your kid just pushed
our kid down again.
387
00:13:25,086 --> 00:13:26,621
Technically, he's not
our kid. Callie...
388
00:13:26,688 --> 00:13:28,321
Oh, my God!
What is he doing now?
389
00:13:28,389 --> 00:13:29,689
He's... he's peeing on Tommy.
390
00:13:29,757 --> 00:13:30,812
Ooh. Not cool.
391
00:13:30,932 --> 00:13:32,408
So what?
That's what people do.
392
00:13:32,528 --> 00:13:35,529
That is not what people do;
that is what cocker spaniels do.
393
00:13:35,596 --> 00:13:37,131
You... you know what you are?
394
00:13:37,199 --> 00:13:39,106
Wait. Please...please don't say it.
A bonebag.
395
00:13:39,969 --> 00:13:41,144
What'd she just call me?
396
00:13:41,387 --> 00:13:43,553
Um... she called you a bonebag.
397
00:13:43,673 --> 00:13:46,940
Which is actually an elegant
little piece of wordplay there.
398
00:13:47,007 --> 00:13:48,994
It... it applies.
399
00:13:49,114 --> 00:13:49,867
You're a bonebag.
400
00:13:49,987 --> 00:13:51,579
Yeah, well, what are you
going to do about it?
401
00:13:51,647 --> 00:13:53,613
Gonna... gonna mix it up.
402
00:13:53,681 --> 00:13:54,879
Mix it up?
That's right.
403
00:13:54,999 --> 00:13:56,083
I hope you like smoothies,
404
00:13:56,151 --> 00:13:57,402
'cause you just turned on
the blender, buddy.
405
00:13:57,522 --> 00:13:58,421
Take these.
406
00:13:58,541 --> 00:14:00,354
Actually, wait, I need them.
407
00:14:00,422 --> 00:14:02,890
What did you just
call my husband?
408
00:14:02,959 --> 00:14:05,760
Called him a... bonebag.
409
00:14:05,828 --> 00:14:07,764
You son of a bitch.
410
00:14:07,831 --> 00:14:09,297
Baby!
411
00:14:09,366 --> 00:14:10,151
You're a bonebag.
412
00:14:10,271 --> 00:14:11,310
That's right, baby.
You tell him.
413
00:14:11,430 --> 00:14:12,701
Yeah.
414
00:14:12,770 --> 00:14:14,370
I am so sorry, Adam.
415
00:14:14,437 --> 00:14:16,706
Not as sorry as my nose is.
416
00:14:16,772 --> 00:14:19,709
It is so sweet of you to drive
your friend to the hospital.
417
00:14:19,776 --> 00:14:21,168
Well, he's hurt,
he's my friend,
418
00:14:21,288 --> 00:14:23,079
and I just found this
ambulance. What do you do?
419
00:14:24,036 --> 00:14:26,617
You know, this is our first ride
in your ambulance together.
420
00:14:27,067 --> 00:14:29,584
This is our first ride
in my ambulance together.
421
00:14:30,788 --> 00:14:32,487
Hello, soul mate.
422
00:14:32,555 --> 00:14:35,190
Hello, soul mate.
423
00:14:40,184 --> 00:14:42,063
Oh, God.
424
00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:42,897
Mama like?
425
00:14:43,017 --> 00:14:44,533
Oh, God, yeah.
426
00:14:44,601 --> 00:14:45,770
Is that where it
is, right there?
427
00:14:45,890 --> 00:14:47,602
Oh, yeah.
That's it. That's it.
428
00:14:47,670 --> 00:14:49,171
Yeah. Right there?
Okay, hey. Keep your hands
429
00:14:49,238 --> 00:14:49,871
where I can see them,
okay, pal?
430
00:14:49,940 --> 00:14:51,706
Honey, come on.
431
00:14:51,774 --> 00:14:53,475
Right here?
Oh, God.
432
00:14:53,543 --> 00:14:55,076
I feel like I'm really
getting to know you.
433
00:14:55,144 --> 00:14:56,044
Oh, yeah.
434
00:14:56,112 --> 00:14:57,312
Okay, you know what?
435
00:14:57,380 --> 00:14:58,066
You're just going to have
to reign it back there
436
00:14:58,186 --> 00:15:00,150
a little bit, 'cause this
has got to stay G-rated.
437
00:15:00,217 --> 00:15:01,884
Honey, you finally got me
to relax,
438
00:15:01,952 --> 00:15:03,152
and now you're driving me crazy.
439
00:15:03,220 --> 00:15:04,532
I'm sorry, This is just weird.
440
00:15:04,652 --> 00:15:05,661
Well, what do you
think's gonna happen?
441
00:15:05,781 --> 00:15:07,040
That I'm going to fall
in love with Dan
442
00:15:07,160 --> 00:15:08,357
and we're going
to run away together?
443
00:15:08,424 --> 00:15:09,190
With Dan?
444
00:15:09,310 --> 00:15:09,989
Are you kidding?
Come on.
445
00:15:10,109 --> 00:15:11,715
I mean, first, he has terrible
taste in music.
446
00:15:11,835 --> 00:15:13,830
It's Laurie's mix.
I told you.
447
00:15:13,897 --> 00:15:15,243
Let me put it to you this way.
448
00:15:15,363 --> 00:15:17,189
If you don't relax,
we are not going to stay
449
00:15:17,309 --> 00:15:18,868
in a hotel
until Tommy's in college.
450
00:15:18,935 --> 00:15:20,569
Okay? Okay.
Okay. Okay.
451
00:15:20,636 --> 00:15:21,737
Thank you.
452
00:15:21,804 --> 00:15:23,605
And now for some real music.
453
00:15:23,673 --> 00:15:25,909
Laurie.
454
00:15:28,412 --> 00:15:32,314
Oh, God.
455
00:15:32,382 --> 00:15:33,605
Yes.
456
00:15:33,725 --> 00:15:35,192
Look, when I see
injustice in the world,
457
00:15:35,229 --> 00:15:36,586
I feel like I have
to do something.
458
00:15:36,653 --> 00:15:37,853
Okay, Batman.
459
00:15:37,921 --> 00:15:39,356
Look, I can't just let people
460
00:15:39,422 --> 00:15:40,760
literally pee all over us.
461
00:15:40,880 --> 00:15:42,991
Well, there is a right
and a wrong way
462
00:15:43,059 --> 00:15:44,693
to resolve these sorts
of conflicts.
463
00:15:44,760 --> 00:15:47,051
I know.
Talk things out like adults.
464
00:15:47,171 --> 00:15:48,663
Or you could steal stuff...
465
00:15:48,731 --> 00:15:50,378
which is why I had Ethan
466
00:15:50,401 --> 00:15:52,497
take that little
pee sack's tricycle.
467
00:15:53,169 --> 00:15:55,036
Hey, you got
a new bicycle, Tommy.
468
00:16:00,910 --> 00:16:02,711
Go ahead.
I know you want to.
469
00:16:02,779 --> 00:16:03,776
Really?
470
00:16:03,896 --> 00:16:05,380
Really. What's
mine is yours now.
471
00:16:10,686 --> 00:16:11,986
That was awesome.
472
00:16:12,054 --> 00:16:13,155
You're awesome.
473
00:16:13,223 --> 00:16:15,424
You're awesome.
474
00:16:26,972 --> 00:16:28,771
Was it just me, or...
475
00:16:28,838 --> 00:16:30,538
did that kind of...
476
00:16:30,606 --> 00:16:32,540
Suck.
Yeah.
477
00:16:32,608 --> 00:16:34,405
Guys, why are we stopped?
478
00:16:34,525 --> 00:16:36,311
Come on.
We got a bleeder back th...
479
00:16:36,379 --> 00:16:37,447
Oh, come on.
480
00:16:38,522 --> 00:16:39,618
Hey, buddy,
481
00:16:39,738 --> 00:16:41,751
do you not
see this is an ambulance?
482
00:16:41,818 --> 00:16:42,995
Move it!
483
00:16:43,115 --> 00:16:44,663
Sorry, sweetie. Last time.
484
00:16:44,783 --> 00:16:45,659
You tell 'em, baby.
485
00:16:45,779 --> 00:16:47,723
Bonebag!
486
00:16:47,792 --> 00:16:49,425
Okay, guys. You're all set.
487
00:16:49,494 --> 00:16:51,194
We'll just give you a few
minutes to get dressed.
488
00:16:51,261 --> 00:16:52,762
And remember to...
489
00:16:52,830 --> 00:16:54,296
drink a lot of water.
490
00:16:54,364 --> 00:16:56,432
It's... That's my line.
491
00:16:56,498 --> 00:16:58,066
This is not the Laurie show.
492
00:16:58,134 --> 00:16:59,303
Oh, that was great.
493
00:16:59,368 --> 00:17:00,201
Oh, God.
Wasn't it, honey?
494
00:17:00,270 --> 00:17:02,205
Oh, yeah.
495
00:17:02,272 --> 00:17:03,071
Oh, my God!
496
00:17:03,140 --> 00:17:04,841
Mike. What are you doing?
497
00:17:04,907 --> 00:17:06,308
What? I'm not doing anything.
498
00:17:06,375 --> 00:17:07,703
I was... What?
499
00:17:07,823 --> 00:17:09,577
Did that girl turn you on?
500
00:17:09,645 --> 00:17:10,237
What girl?
501
00:17:10,357 --> 00:17:13,641
- What girl? Laurie from 20 seconds ago.
- Laurie?
502
00:17:13,761 --> 00:17:15,578
Yeah, who you referred
to as an attractive lady.
503
00:17:15,698 --> 00:17:16,887
Is that what happened?
504
00:17:17,269 --> 00:17:19,221
Laurie was working out
a lot of stuff in my back.
505
00:17:19,290 --> 00:17:20,789
Oh. Oh.
506
00:17:20,857 --> 00:17:23,158
Yeah, and she pushed a lot of
blood in different directions.
507
00:17:23,225 --> 00:17:24,176
Mm-hmm.
I didn't have any control
508
00:17:24,296 --> 00:17:26,229
as to where it was going.
I'm kidding, babe.
509
00:17:26,297 --> 00:17:28,496
I'm busting your chops.
510
00:17:28,564 --> 00:17:31,266
She said we had a few
minutes, right? So, uh...
511
00:17:31,334 --> 00:17:32,403
Do you want to...
512
00:17:32,523 --> 00:17:34,335
Should we, you know?
513
00:17:34,403 --> 00:17:35,703
Could we?
We could.
514
00:17:35,771 --> 00:17:37,005
Should we?
515
00:17:37,072 --> 00:17:38,372
We shall.
516
00:17:38,440 --> 00:17:40,304
Let me set the mood.
517
00:17:40,424 --> 00:17:42,310
Do it.
518
00:17:43,780 --> 00:17:44,879
Oh, yeah.
519
00:17:46,349 --> 00:17:48,986
God, you are one beautiful...
520
00:17:51,144 --> 00:17:53,263
I am so sorry. You're right.
521
00:17:53,383 --> 00:17:55,079
I pushed it. We should never
have been doing this.
522
00:17:55,147 --> 00:17:57,191
No, sweetie.
Just finish these forms
523
00:17:57,311 --> 00:17:59,719
so we can get home
and finish what we started.
524
00:18:00,926 --> 00:18:02,038
- Come here.
- Oh... Mmm...
525
00:18:02,711 --> 00:18:03,360
Ow!
526
00:18:03,383 --> 00:18:04,723
Oh. Sorry. Oh...
527
00:18:04,790 --> 00:18:05,957
No, it's okay.
Babe.
528
00:18:06,027 --> 00:18:08,059
Oh... I love you.
529
00:18:09,659 --> 00:18:10,497
What?
530
00:18:10,563 --> 00:18:12,196
Nothing. Why don't
you just stay right here?
531
00:18:12,264 --> 00:18:13,298
Okay. Mm-hmm.
Right here.
532
00:18:13,365 --> 00:18:14,688
And then fill that out.
Okay.
533
00:18:14,808 --> 00:18:17,079
I'm gonna go use the restroom.
Okay, honey.
534
00:18:20,206 --> 00:18:21,906
He broke his nose during sex.
535
00:18:21,974 --> 00:18:23,041
I know.
536
00:18:23,109 --> 00:18:24,771
That's when you know it's good.
537
00:18:24,891 --> 00:18:26,987
What is going on?
What are you doing here?
538
00:18:26,988 --> 00:18:28,290
Hey! Mike!
What are you doing here?
539
00:18:28,312 --> 00:18:29,579
- Is Tommy okay?
- Tommy is fine.
540
00:18:29,648 --> 00:18:31,302
Well, he did pitch a little
diaper tent, but...
541
00:18:31,422 --> 00:18:33,162
What happened to your nose?
What happened to your nose?
542
00:18:33,282 --> 00:18:34,359
You look like a duck.
543
00:18:34,479 --> 00:18:35,895
You look like
a... Help me.
544
00:18:36,015 --> 00:18:37,076
Duck.
Duck.
545
00:18:38,188 --> 00:18:40,503
All right.
Let's get this right.
546
00:18:40,619 --> 00:18:41,511
All right.
547
00:18:42,866 --> 00:18:43,851
Oh, no.
548
00:18:43,971 --> 00:18:45,857
All right. Not working. I'm calling it.
Yeah.
549
00:18:45,924 --> 00:18:47,118
This is so strange.
550
00:18:47,238 --> 00:18:48,519
I mean, this should work.
551
00:18:48,639 --> 00:18:50,083
You've got the whole
British thing going on
552
00:18:50,203 --> 00:18:52,342
with the sexy snake hips.
553
00:18:52,462 --> 00:18:53,686
I thought it would be
like kissing Mick Jagger,
554
00:18:53,806 --> 00:18:55,867
but it's kind of
like kissing a drifter.
555
00:18:55,935 --> 00:18:56,850
No offense.
556
00:18:56,970 --> 00:18:58,911
None taken. I assume you
mean a young Mick Jagger,
557
00:18:59,031 --> 00:19:00,726
cause these days he's a bit
of an old paperbag.
558
00:19:00,846 --> 00:19:01,316
Oh yeah.
559
00:19:01,436 --> 00:19:03,612
You couldn't watch him for 6 hours
without ending up in the hospital?
560
00:19:03,732 --> 00:19:05,652
- I just want one night out with my wife.
- Look,
561
00:19:05,772 --> 00:19:08,177
I know that it looks bad, but it's fine,
I promise.
562
00:19:08,297 --> 00:19:11,283
Alright, and the good news is we learnt
a valuable lesson about picking our bells.
563
00:19:11,403 --> 00:19:12,616
Yeah, and conflict resolution.
564
00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:15,288
That's right. Sometimes you
gotta go in there and mix it up.
565
00:19:15,408 --> 00:19:17,778
He totally turned the blender on.
It was very hot.
566
00:19:17,898 --> 00:19:18,948
- Did you see that?
- Yeah, I liked that.
567
00:19:19,361 --> 00:19:21,852
Hey, idiots.
You both suck.
568
00:19:22,367 --> 00:19:23,884
Do you have any idea what
I've been through today?
569
00:19:24,004 --> 00:19:26,438
I had a man touch me,
just to make my wife happy.
570
00:19:26,558 --> 00:19:28,314
- You what?
- I don't wanna talk about it...
571
00:19:29,139 --> 00:19:30,621
You guys have to get Tommy home. Now.
572
00:19:30,741 --> 00:19:33,668
Cause if Lisa sees him in a hospital,
I will never leave the house again.
573
00:19:34,497 --> 00:19:36,582
Did you even change his diaper?
I mean, really.
574
00:19:36,894 --> 00:19:37,844
He smells like tinkle.
575
00:19:37,964 --> 00:19:39,450
- Um, that's his hair.
- What?
576
00:19:39,570 --> 00:19:42,299
She just...
That's a funny story for another day.
577
00:19:43,100 --> 00:19:46,297
Hey, guys, hello?
Can we go? We gotta get out of here.
578
00:19:47,420 --> 00:19:50,015
- Mike? Oh my God.
- Oh, bonebag.
579
00:19:50,258 --> 00:19:51,427
Bonebag?
580
00:19:52,058 --> 00:19:53,101
Bonebag?
581
00:19:53,221 --> 00:19:55,136
- That's the guy from the car.
- I'm gonna take you down.
582
00:19:55,256 --> 00:19:56,445
Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey!
583
00:19:56,565 --> 00:19:58,421
Hey, hey, calm down.
You're taking this all wrong.
584
00:19:58,541 --> 00:20:00,912
Bonebag is just an elegant
piece of wordplay.
585
00:20:02,897 --> 00:20:04,761
I must say, these guys really
saved my life.
586
00:20:05,636 --> 00:20:07,176
Well, technically, I saved your life.
587
00:20:07,796 --> 00:20:09,974
Yeah, well, I would have, if Tommy
wasn't in my arms.
588
00:20:10,796 --> 00:20:12,684
And you weren't holding Tommy,
it was Lisa.
589
00:20:13,020 --> 00:20:14,005
Same family.
590
00:20:15,249 --> 00:20:17,960
- It's pretty weak.
- Alright, bonebags. Next round's on me.
591
00:20:19,882 --> 00:20:21,932
You know none of this would have happened
if we hadn't clinked on it.
592
00:20:23,432 --> 00:20:24,903
Let's not have each other's lives.
593
00:20:33,046 --> 00:20:35,414
I just want a long term commitment.
594
00:20:37,728 --> 00:20:39,280
I just want a long term commitment.
595
00:20:40,424 --> 00:20:42,300
I just want someone to grow old with.
596
00:20:42,636 --> 00:20:44,177
I just wanna grow old with someone.
597
00:20:45,567 --> 00:20:47,710
I just wanna have a lot of babies and....
598
00:20:47,830 --> 00:20:49,273
I wanna have tons of babies.
599
00:20:49,393 --> 00:20:51,852
- Even in Kansas?
- As many as possible. I'd move to Kansas.
600
00:20:51,972 --> 00:20:53,462
Anywhere.
601
00:20:53,678 --> 00:20:55,196
- Really?
- I have...
602
00:20:55,578 --> 00:20:56,644
I have anger issues.
603
00:20:57,200 --> 00:21:00,038
- I have anger issues.
- I punch windows constantly.
604
00:21:00,310 --> 00:21:02,465
I punch windows sometimes.
605
00:21:03,769 --> 00:21:04,584
Um...
606
00:21:04,704 --> 00:21:07,792
- I don't understand what bonebag means.
- I don't understand what bonebag means.
607
00:21:07,912 --> 00:21:09,646
- It's not elegant wordplay.
- It's not.
608
00:21:09,766 --> 00:21:11,418
I get 20% off at The Commisary.
609
00:21:11,538 --> 00:21:12,397
Just saying.
610
00:21:12,517 --> 00:21:14,852
- I've never been to The Commisary.
- Me neither.
611
00:21:14,972 --> 00:21:16,116
I've worked here for years.
612
00:21:16,236 --> 00:21:17,610
- Really?
- Yeah.
613
00:21:18,746 --> 00:21:20,715
- You wanna hear a lovestory?
- Yeah.
614
00:21:21,375 --> 00:21:23,541
I do. I wanna hear a lovestory.
615
00:21:24,265 --> 00:21:26,153
- Once upon a time...
- Mm-hmm.
616
00:21:26,273 --> 00:21:28,777
- There was a man sent to Anzio.
- Uh-uh.
617
00:21:29,633 --> 00:21:40,591
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