Come on! Everyone take your dick in your hand.
Bloody Da Vinci, are you going to ask for extra shade now?
It’s not too long...
It’s not going to be too long.
I've googled this.
India comes on number 16 on the global penis index.
And anyway, everyone was told that the upper limit should be only 7 inches.
No, sir. I was making the mole.
Asshole.
Are you going to put a shade of lipstick on the tip?
What the hell is this?
Too ambitious. 4/10.
Is that a dick or a beaker?
Anaconda.
5/10.
6/10 bro. What’s wrong with it?
We had discussed this already.
I saw it.
Bloody Picasso, what the hell is this?
You were supposed to draw a dick, not your selfie.
He ruined my mood completely.
Not that bad actually. Not bad.
- Scope for improvement. - Decent. Decent.
This will go for rechecking.
Who made this?
10/10.
For your honesty, bitch.
This is unfair.
My marks were cut.
From now on no one will know you by your faces in this hostel.
For the next 10 days, this will be your identity on the campus.
You will stick this on your back.
Screwed!
Freshie, sitting in the library.
You thought there will no ragging in the library.
Smart boy, wrong choice.
Ravi Teja can smell freshers from miles away.
Let’s do one thing.
We’ll both go to my room.
Sit next to each other and turn on the laptop.
And...enjoy.
What?
The thing that starts with a P and ends with ORN.
And at the end, I want to lick my fingers.
So salty.
What?
POPCORN.
Come on, girls, Teja, is ragging a fresher.
- Freshers get ragged. - Exactly.
Go and talk to him.
Absolutely not. I am scared of Ravi Teja.
I am not as scary as I look.
I’m much more.
Unfortunately, whenever I see a female I want to have sex.
But no one gives it to me.
What?
The thing that starts with a C and ends with T.
CONSENT.
You can’t rag without consent, Teja.
Yes.
And if we complain about this you’ll be facing DISCO.
DISCO?
Yeah... Disciplinary Committee.
And once the DISCO starts
it won’t stop before spreading chaos.
It's all written here in the anti-ragging dossier.
You guys will complain to the DISCO. Who will believe you guys?
You guys rag freshers too.
Are you mad, Teja? I never ragged anyone.
And girls never rag anyone.
Because we value consent.
And I even filed a petition on change.org against Kabir Singh.
Kabir Singh? Who is this new guy?
Fuck! You...
Move aside. You haven’t seen Kabir Singh?
- No. - Come on. Give me your phone.
If he doesn't watch it then how will he vote on the petition?
Watch it now.
Yes. Come, Preeti.
- Sorry. - Mohit. Mohit Panda.
What?
Girls, we rescued a Panda today.
Come, Panda. Sorry, Mohit.
Come.
Kabir Singh...seeing.
If anyone rags you, put in a complaint.
It's a responsibility and not power.
You might not get a single intro if you do this.
People might lock you in the bathroom.
Or stick a note on your back that says "Asshole".
But you still have to uphold this responsibility
because complaining is the second-best form of helping.
And best...
Laughter yoga. I practise a lot.
But complaint should be in return
for action to be taken.
That's why there is a format for complaint in the dossier.
Dossier?
Didn’t you read the anti-ragging dossier before joining the institute?
Here. Read it today.
You read all the terms and conditions before installing any app on your phone.
- You do, don’t you? - Yes.
Read it.
Udipi. More bread.
Quickly.
He’s Udipi. He’s a senior.
He used to rag innocent juniors.
So under sub-clause 21 section 8, he's doing community service.
Community service. Easy way to atone.
Udipi.
So Udipi, what moral lesson did you learn from this punishment?
Those who dig graves for others falls themselves.
Thank you.
Go.
See...he learned his lesson.
But don't worry. I will duly train you.
- Sir... - Take your pants off.
Take it off.
Can’t I do it without taking it off?
Listen, mama-mama bread.
Is it my fault that Superman used to wear his underwear over his pants?
Is it my fault? It’s not. Then just do as I said.
Wear it now.
What will you do on your wedding night?
Martha...asshole.
Take it off.
Hey 50% off.
Why are you laughing?
Come and kneel down here.
Kneel down here.
I said kneel down. Don’t mimic Shahrukh.
Dickhead.
Let me show you.
Don't call me sir.
Why don’t you give some eggs too?
Comedy Nights is going here right?
I am Gutthi
Bloody assholes. This is a pathetic batch.
We'll have to show them porn for 24-hours in a row.
- Right. - Only then will they learn.
Are you serious? Do you mean it? Thank you.
Look Ronnie Sin...with your hands tied behind your back.
Now say thank you.
Give yourself a blowjob.
Run! Run!
Do whatever you want, come to my room
Do you own the hostel asshole?
People ask us DISCO guys why ragging happens in the first place.
But there’s a simple answer for it.
GKK Syndrome.
Meaning Gali Ka Kutta Syndrome.
Let’s assume you’re a common mongrel
who wanders from pillar to post in your neighbourhood.
You’ve such a useless existence, don’t you?
Sad life.
These seniors are like those dogs.
Forget about their home, neighbourhood, or school
even customer care never showed them any respect.
But their existence gets a purpose
when some biker or freshie enters their neighbourhood
and they chase after him.
If the biker stops there’s nothing these dogs can do.
But these bikers never stop or complain to the municipality.
They keep running.
And you know, this GKK Syndrome is very common.
Very common. It's found in most places.
Like your PT teacher, HR Manager, uncle, and...even in religion.
Now if someone begs or pleads in front of a purposeless, useless entity
then it’s going to be fun for him.
7/10.
I always got A+ in my art class as a kid.
If sir finds out this is how I am using my talent...
I don't understand why they print the anti-ragging dossier in the first place.
Why don't they add to the college motto
that each man for himself.
And where is this bastard taking us?
Where there’s a supervillain like Kilvish, there is also Shaktimaan.
Come on.
If some boys got drunk and peed on your desk
then are you going to fine them?
As the hostel president, I am firing you from the warden's post.
Sir is the hostel president. Mukesh Khanna.
Money?
I am Mukesh Khanna not Ambani.
I don't understand the language of money.
130 rupees. Fine, send me through UPI.
Sir...
So you guys didn’t get breakfast either.
Ragging? In this hostel?
When I am around?
What’s the problem?
Sir, they are giving us a headache.
They haven’t given us an intro yet.
Maybe, but they all voted for me.
So I cannot do anything.
Quietly keep getting ragged or...
Don't they know about Brexit?
Brexit?
Bra exit.
You’ve to quietly sneak in the girl’s hostel at night
and steal the girl’s bra.
And become the hero of Race 3.
And this bra...
I mean whichever girl’s bra you’ll steal
will be hung in the Victoria Chamber of Secrets.
Go tonight at 9 pm after in-time.
I'll wait for you here with the entire wing.
Either you get the bra or get ragged.
Quickly find Victoria’s secret and get out.
But how will we know which bra is of Victoria?
And more thing.
Where’s the brand name written on Victoria’s Secret?
Is that the secret?
Assholes. It’s written on the bra’s strap.
And on the helm of the sports bra. Okay.
This is what happens when the entire generation watches porn instead of FTV.
Dickheads all of you.
Hey.
Victoria’s Secret.
Must belong to a hot gal.
Take it off.
My girlfriend has already told me.
Someday I’ll definitely get in trouble trying to take off the bra.
Sir, what if we get caught?
Don't worry about it. Two girls will handle everything.
One of them is my girlfriend.
And the other is my ex-girlfriend.
Bra.
Bloody perverts.
It’s sister-in-law.
That's Mukesh Khanna’s ex and she’s his present.
He said they will handle everything.
Will you handle everything, sister-in-law?
Of course. We’ll handle everything.
But first, take off your t-shirts. Come on.
I don’t think Mukesh Khanna will like it if he finds out, sister-in-law.
Take your t-shirt off, dickheads.
Hostel life is full of exertion. So here’s our best friend.
Balm.
Don't speak like diploma people. He has a name.
Methyl Salicylate. What's it called?
Methyl Salicylate.
Good. Fast learner.
And yes, students must always have this with them.
Dettol, bandages, cotton, enema tube, Odomos.
Enema tube.
You’re so naive.
It's easy to swallow mess food.
But coming out is the real challenge.
So...
Use only what you need.
Bernie Sanders says student debt is a serious problem.
But pay for me now and I’ll pay you back later.
I didn’t bring my wallet.
My Victoria.
Come.
Shy guy...
Jhantoo's
He's your dinner. Go and enjoy.
- Come on. - Forgive me.
It was a mistake.
I don't know even know what a bra is.
- Come on. - I thought it’s a catapult.
You came to steal Mukti’s bra. Huh.
Do you know the effort it takes to buy a bra?
Wait for three months for the sale to begin.
- Dozens of trips to the mall. - Sister...
- Wait in the queue. - Sister...
- You don’t even get your size... - Sister!
You’re missing the point.
You came to steal Mukti’s bra. Huh.
Then you must behave similarly with mom and sister, you fucking perverts.
No. Today you’ve resorted to this, tomorrow you’ll touch anyone you want!
What is this? Take it off.
You like objectifying girls, don’t you?
Okay, then.
Come on.
Where?
Now you can’t download games or open porn sites.
Now your roommates can never do what they did with me.
What?
They replaced my study material with their study material.
When I used to type titration, it used to show results for tits.
This is for next time, okay.
Limited edition, top-of-the-line, noise cancellation headphones.
Now the outside world cannot bother you.
Not even music.
Let the wingies party all night, but your sleep won’t get disturbed. Come on.
Come on.
Asshole.
Let me explain to you again.
You’re the boy, you’re the girl, and you...
are the condom.
Clear?
Girls. Girls. Girls.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry.
Only we girls cry while having sex.
You can’t cry. Be a man!
Don't cry.
You dick...lie down.
Lie down.
Come on, lie down.
Lie down!
Now, spread your legs!
Sit.
Yeah...
And get on with it.
"Embrace me tight..."
Easy tiger.
This is no fun.
Thing is...
Doggy style!
- Come on. - Make like a dog.
Wait...he doesn’t know how to make like a dog.
Come on, get on your knees.
And you, hold his hair. Go ahead.
Go for it.
Very good.
Yeah...that’s right. Go for it.
Good job.
Yeah...
Sorry, ma'am, I can't do this.
I came to the college for a job, not to give blowjobs.
Bloody pimp, I’ve said this before.
Consent.
Exactly.
Is this your first time?
Come on, girls. This is his first time.
Before you do anything ask the girl
whether she wants to wear a condom or not, does she want to do it or not?
Do you want to wear a condom?
No.
He didn’t want a condom, and you guys are wasting your time.
Let it be.
This batch is pathetic.
Bloody dickheads. Let’s leave them with the warden.
- Come on. - No, ma’am. Please listen to me.
We did this because the seniors told us to do so.
We had no idea that the girl's hostel is like this.
I see...
So tell me how is a girl’s hostel.
Pillow fight.
Catfight.
Makeout.
Ahh, makeout.
We kiss and caress in the hostel.
You want another chance, don’t you?
Yes.
Fine, given.
We’ll ask you a question. If you answer it correctly
then you’ll get the bra you came for.
And on top of that
Napu and I will kiss too. Lip to lip.
And tongue.
But if your answer is wrong.
There's going to be kissing alright...same.
But between you two.
Girls, fair?
Yeah.
Okay.
Fine.
Well, you know a lot about girls, don’t you?
So tell me...
where is the labia situated?
Ma'am...
Asshole, you could’ve said no if you didn’t know.
Why did you have to say it’s a country in Africa?
If my girlfriend finds out she will screw...you.
And if you brought vaseline from home, why didn’t you apply it?
You wanted to have fun, didn’t you?
I didn't know these girls will turn out to be two-timing.
And let’s get out of here quietly.
- We’ll deal with presi tomorrow. - But Rakhi.
Screw Rakhi. He’s still worried about Rakhi.
Where is the bra?
We couldn’t get it, sir.
I want my bra in my room right now!
I sent you idiots to get the bra
instead, you were sticking your tongue in each other.
Since ’95 there hasn’t been a single kiss in this hostel.
And no one thought this is how it’s going to be.
It's all my fault.
I gave the wrong answer.
I didn’t know what a labia.
That's basic knowledge, man! Labia is a country in Africa.
Rupesh Bhatti.
How dare you send three guys to a girl's hostel.
When the deal was for four.
Akanksha.
Akanksha Thakur. Second-year.
Go ahead. She’s giving her intro.
And why just her. Here’s my intro as well.
Rupesh Bhatti. Second-year.
D 69. I am not the president yet...but I will become the president someday.
Of the Haryana Farmer’s Welfare Association.
Ankit Pandey, aka DOPA.
The hentai king of his hostel.
They must be returning from the girl’s hostel any minute.
Put on your clothes.
Mukesh Khanna, you?
You know them, bro.
Now you all got your intros. Are you happy?
Got yourself embarrassed. Judged us.
Now if any senior asks you
then tell him that you have Jhaantoo’s intro.
What?
Jhaantoo...sir.
Other than that for cigrette, alcohol, DOPA recommended award winning porn
or any information to control a bull or a cow that’s gone out of limit
only then will you come to this room.
Got it. Now get lost bitches.
- Get out. Get lost. - Come on.
By the way, this time you chose nice boys.
Thanks.
Guys, guys, let’s focus now.
Because Chirag's coming and he'll write a complaint to DISCO...
Come back later. We’re preparing for ragging.
Yes
even we got the information
that you guys are planning extensively for ragging.
Someone complained to DISCO about this room.
All five have to come.
Okay.
Yes.
Fuck DISCO.
DISCO will say sequel on anyone and we’ll let the rest go.
So they will call you one by one.
If you don’t give any name to DISCO they will keep harassing you.
If they put a backlog then your degree will get extended.
And once your degree gets extended
then you lose the job, career, and green card.
Then marriage and kids too.
The biological clock is ticking on you, not them.
But don't get carried away, maintain your unity.
Most importantly don’t take any names.
And give only one answer to all their questions.
No, sir.
So you didn’t rag anyone?
I know shagging, sir, but ragging...
So you don’t know what ragging is.
Sir, I’m completely against ragging.
How?
The same way you rag freshers.
Sir, we girls don’t even use bad words.
Men are assholes, I tell you.
So who was involved in the ragging?
Ma’am, I am pretty certain it was those three guys.
Especially that Jatin.
Jhantoo?
Yes, sir. I saw it with my own eyes.
Freshers looking terrorised in front of him.
And this is why we told you to rag boys
so you can put the blame on them.
Now go quietly and act like Preeti from Kabir Singh.
You don't know what’s going on.
And ma’am, we girls want ragging to stop.
They...
They steal our bra, ma’am.
They stole Mukti’s Victoria 36D.
Poor thing can’t stop crying.
Victor Secret 36D. That’s hard to find.
Exactly.
I've been ragging kids for so many years but never came to this.
Last year Bassi threw the water cooler from the third floor.
They never summoned him.
Poor girls got stuck in this mess because of us.
It's a good thing girls got involved too.
Have you ever seen girls getting suspended?
You're right.
They will get us out of this mess too.
And anyway he’s a bookworm.
Jaat, you won’t understand.
You think you’re smart.
We'll see you later.
Yes, don't worry about a thing. We’ll handle this.
Akku...
take care.
And
keep writing.
Nabomita!
Is she getting married? What do you mean keep writing?
You all have been suspended for a year.
And fined Rs. 15,000 each.
Sir...
No sir.
Sir, we're very poor.
Have you seen Swades?
That grandma who doesn’t have electricity.
She is my grandma, sir.
Sir, my father runs Baba’s Dhaba.
He doesn't get any money for it.
That YouTuber betrayed him, sir.
Sir, that guy Mukesh. Battling with cancer.
He’s my older brother.
- But isn’t he dead? - What? He’s dead?
Sir, we don’t even have money for his funeral.
See...isn’t this fun?
Don’t apologise to us. Call the freshers.
Bro...
We made a big mistake.
Please forgive us.
He’s not a fresher.
Asshole, we never ragged you.
Look at his face.
I wouldn’t even offer him my buffalo’s milk forget about ragging.
When did we screw with you?
Sir
it’s not them.
Then who is it?
Chirag Bansal.
But he's the head of our anti-ragging squad.
In fact, he’s written this anti-ragging dossier for this institute.
Exactly.
Yes, sir, It’s him.
He’s made my life hell.
All the other freshers have started with their hostel life.
But I feel I am back in school.
The things he makes me do, sir.
Like what?
Bathe every day.
Change your underwear every day.
And put on a new diaper every day.
What? Everyday?
Bathe every day?
No, sir. I never forced him, sir.
Sir, he even took me to the bathroom.
And he stands outside and listens to the water dropping.
Two days ago, he was saying that I cheated.
I could hear water falling all the time. Meaning you didn’t use any soap.
It feels like home, sir.
I haven’t started abusing yet, sir.
The other day my roommate called me the son of a bitch.
And I said you become what you say.
That's not how it’s done, sir.
All my wingmates are getting intro's.
He doesn't let me download any series from torrents.
Because it’s pirated.
And seniors are showing live sex to freshers on xhamsters.
Is this ragging?
But their hands are tied, sir.
Oh, God.
Boys are going over to the girl's hostel and dancing.
Kissing.
While I am sitting here and trying to understand
the configuration on the motherboard.
We're very disappointed with you, Chirag.
But since the complaint is in writing we'll have to take action.
Please leave.
Sorry, sir.
Sir, would you like some milk?
No, I'll have tea later.
No, thanks. Bye.
Every dog has its limits. And he never crosses it.
Whether it's ragging or caring everything must have a limit.
Not the match-making kind.
If you rag kids, they can get spoiled.
But if you over-care for them, things can get worse.
As for the juniors, they will adapt themselves to this environment.
If the hostel is a jungle, then they are a delicate Mowgli.
The courage they need to survive four years in this jungle
can only be taught by Sher Khan...
I mean the seniors.
Today they are at the bottom.
But tomorrow, they will be on top of the food chain.
And peace will be maintained in this jungle.
And if not...we're not a bunch of assholes sitting around.
Even lemon tastes sour today.
You can have it with this piece of bread because this is sour too.
It's not the cook but the server's talent.
Hey asshole, two more pieces of bread.
Hurry up.
Did you add salt to dessert as well?
No.
I told you...you rag children too much.
Give me two pieces of bread.
I've told you before, Chirag, don't rag children without consent.
Leave all that and tell me
did you lund (learn) your lesson.
Yes, one shouldn’t even care without consent.
Fuck off.
Asshole! Asshole!
From now on, Chirag will be spelt G A N D U!
Asshole!